1. I love being “man handled” while doing it. Throw me against a wall and pull my hair, or get the hell out of here..

2. Though women totally get me hot (can drive myself crazy just THINKING about watching porn, looking at playboy, etc.) I have absolutely no desire to eat a vag.

3. The first time I slept with my ex I came twice. I thought for sure I would marry him. Didn’t happen.

4. The best orgasm I ever had was in the missionary position (weird, I know) right after my partner bit the shit out of my leg and broke skin.

5. I’m ridiculously wet just writing this list, and am taking pause to go fool around with myself.

6. The way into my pants is through my neck. Touch it, kiss it, brush my hair off it, whatever. My panties will drop like they are hot.

7. The first time a guy spanked me I stopped to think about it; and then asked him to do it again.

8. I’ve had my salad tossed, and while it felt AH-MAZING, I’m still grossed out by it.

9. I can’t separate physical from emotional and end up in devastating predicaments when I attempt casual relations.

10. I’ve slept with a Bolivian and an Asian. The Bolivian was way bigger, but the Asian was WAY WAY better at it, and by no means lacking in size as stereotypes lead us to believe.

11. I’m not insanely into receiving oral. Some say it’s because I haven’t had anyone do it right, but I think it’s that I just love being penetrated.

12. Nothing gets me fucking crazier in bed than playing “just the tip” until I can’t take it anymore and practically shove it in. I. Will. Go. Nuts.

13. I do enjoy giving head. I have a fantasy of fucking a guy, getting off him to suck it, and then climbing back on to finish the job. Unfortunately, I’d have to be having condomless sex for this to work out as I picture and don’t play that game unless I’m monogamous. Which I’m not.

14. My cherry didn’t pop until a year after I started having sex. The Bolivian got me. And he got me good.

15. My most hilarious semi sexual experience was meeting up with a bachelor party, joining them on their party bus, going to a strip club, and then making out/dry humping one of the bachelor’s on the stage (thankfully, it wasn’t the groom!!).

16. Once, when I was about 12ish, my mom walked in on me masturbating. With a pillow.

17. My ex’s mom walked in on us doing it on her dryer. I had just got done saying, “I thought this would be better.”

18. I have a tiny tiny scar on my back from when I was sitting on a bathroom sink counter and my partner “pushed” me into the basin and I hit the faucet. Extremely funny, but also kind of painful.

19. I think it would be really hot to do it in a high rise hotel, from behind, with my boobs pushed up against the glass.

20. I can fall asleep pretty much immediately after sex. Unless it is bad.

21. I had a pregnancy scare with my ex when our condom broke. Nothing we could do until the pharmacy opened the next morning and I could go get Plan B so we just sort of hung out. He asked if I was okay and I said, “Yes, just a bit scared.” He responded with, “You’re scared? What about me?” What about you, jackass???

22. I had a boyfriend that couldn’t get off no matter what we tried. It really did a number on my self esteem, and sex because a chore.

23. I wish I was adventurous in the real world as I am in my head.

24. I talk a big game, think an even bigger game, but am severely lacking in tangible sexual experience.

25. I think it is insanely interesting, sexually empowering, and awesome that almost every post on this blog is by a woman. YEAH!!