1. I'm a 26-year-old cisgender female. I identify as a lesbian, but am aware that (as with all identifications) the precise meaning will remain permanently unclear. In fact, I am a little suspicious of my own ability to articulate sexual desire, but I do not think that reflecting on my desire will ruin it. I just think we fool ourselves, most of the time, when we try to talk to ourselves about what really turns us on.

2. I've had 5 sexual partners. One was a 5-year commited relationship with the man to whom I lost my virginity. One of them is my current (also committed long-term) relationship with a woman who I love very much. The other three were friends I messed around with in the interim. Four of them were women. One of these experiences was an attempt to prove to myself that I can have sex without romantic feelings. Turns out I can, and it was fun and I would hypothetically do it again, but I was somewhat surprised and a little relieved to find that my orgasms are better within the terms of a committed, loving relationship.

3. I'm slim, but not super-skinny, I'm pretty happy with my B-C breast size, and I think my ass is probably pretty cute. I don't have a large stomach but my abs are not tight and never will be. I think about the way I look much more than I ought to. I blame the male gaze that has infected society like a cancer, has been feeding me messages since before I could speak...

4. My nipples are my favorite part of my body. Seriously, you could lick/suck on them for days and I wouldn't stop you. This is one of the secret reasons why I never want to give birth to a child. I'm worried I would lose that relationship to my own breasts.

5. I love wearing a strap-on. This strikes me as odd because I look and feel pretty girly most of the time. I never thought I'd want to wear something that protrudes from my crotch, but what a feeling. Wow.

6. Whenever I have sex while wearing a strap-on I fantasize about being penetrated with the strap-on. (I have always wondered if straight men feel this way when they have PIV sex with women.) However, if I do wind up being penetrated, I usually don't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. I really can only take so much penetration.

7. I came out of the closet before I had had sex with a woman. I always felt a little strange about that--as if I decided my destiny before I really knew--but then I remember that that's how I wound up sleeping with a guy, I decided THAT destiny before I had any empirical knowledge too. We all walk into sexuality completely blind, don't we?

8. I have some weird kinks that I'm not ready to admit to myself. Old internet search histories would probably really disturb my partner. I really don't think I'll ever act on them though.

9. Tribadism is really amazing. The problem is that 9 times out of 10, when I try it, I just feel ridiculous. When it works, though... wow.

10. I have this twisted fantasy of having a threesome and gently tribbing with another girl on either side of a guy's penis. It would probably be too awkward of a position to hold, and I will probably never act on it, but still...

11. I fantasize about exhibitionism, but I tend to behave as an almost compulsive voyeur.

12. I masturbate frequently. Often daily. This borders on a political act for me. I think it's important to understand my own individual and ever-changing sexuality.

13. The amount of sex I have directly reflects the amount of emotional intimacy in my relationship. I'm not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg.

14. I love porn. I am a feminist, I am vocal about the harmful effects of objectifying/overly sexualizing women, but I LOVE porn. I do not see this as a contradiction. I think sexual expression is a key component in a culture that values freedom and I think that more women need to pick up cameras/write erotica/talk about what turns them on. If we don't, the market is just going to keep defining desire in terms of the male (usually heterosexual) gaze.This is why I prefer amateur or body-positive porn. But please don't sell me that lame "sensual," "romantic," "female-friendly" bullshit that attempts to define "female sexuality" for me. I'll decide what the fuck porn I'm into. Just show me people who are really enjoying themselves and I'll probably enjoy it too.

15. The anus repulses me. My own anus repulses me. I don't judge you for enjoying analingus but I'll never do it/want it.

16. I  have much better orgasms with my own fingers than with a vibrator, but every once in a while I like to mix it up.

17. I like women of color more than white women, and have always felt guilty about that. I'm white and I hate the thought of desiring race qua race, like I need a certain degree of "exoticism" as defined from the perspective of my bourgeois white privileged perspective... but their nipples and skin are just prettier! And freckles (sorry Celts) kind of freak me out.

18. I like women both chubby and skinny, both femme and androgynous, but I have never been attracted to a stone butch. Dunno why, because I feel a lot of personal admiration for very butch women.

19. Every once in a while I want to fuck a random male stranger. It's a fleeting fantasy that I'll likely never act on, and even if I did I probably wouldn't enjoy it, but it's there.

20. I really want to have group sex. My partner would never be cool with it and I cannot imagine a context in which such a thing could spontaneously develop, but I really hope I get to try it one day.

21. There are, in fact, naked photos of me on the internet. They're on a site with very little traffic, and it's unlikely you'll ever see them...but If I do say so myself, they're really hot.

21. I started masturbating around 9 years old and I used the exceedingly thin handle of a paintbrush holder. I think I did orgasm, but I didn't know what it was.

22. I experienced my next real orgasm while at a horseback riding lesson. I thought something was wrong with me and was very scared. Then it happened again. I told me mom about it but she didn't tell me what happened. I didn't figure it out until much, much later.

23. I've experimented with sex under the influence of consciousness-altering drugs with my partner. It was fun, but really, all I wanted to do while on all these sex/party drugs is talk. Sex is great, but I think the intimacy that I crave has to do with really knowing/being honest with someone. This intimacy is a lot more elusive than it should be.

24. I think that there is something that is fundamentally consciousness altering about sex itself and I think it's more than the happy chemicals and neurotransmitters that fly around in the bloodstream. I think that messing with the boundaries of your body, inviting someone inside, being welcomed in by someone else, reminds us of something elusive and primal about our natures. I also don't think that will ever be made into a commodity.

25. I wish I could talk about sex more freely and more openly with more people. I push people's boundaries too much, but I don't mean to be predatory. Despite the impossibility of articulating sexual desire, I think we need to confront it, to challenge the way it is used against it, to challenge the way we express/repress it, to understand its power for good and its danger... this blog is pretty great.

1. I am a 19-year-old gay male. I am slender and I am from Kentucky, USA.

2. I realized that I was gay in the 6th grade and I told my parents in 8th grade. I then came out to my entire school my sophomore year. I've never once been ridiculed about my sexuality. Not a single time. Everyone has been so incredibly supportive I think my story could be a fairy tale or something.

3. I am 100% gay. I have no sexual attraction to women whatsoever, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like. I also wonder if straight men wonder what it would be like to be with a man.

4. I love straight men. It is such a stereotypical thing, but I do my best to respect their boundaries.

5. When I lost my virginity, I loved it. I bottomed that time and he was rather small so it didn't hurt. From there I topped the next guy, and the rest were back and forth. I have since had sex with 20 men and fooled around with somewhere around 50. Although these numbers seem outrageous, I don't consider myself to be a whore. I enjoy myself and I enjoy making someone else feel good.  I have only loved two of those people, and they both turned out to be crazy.

6. I contracted an STD, and I have never been the same since. Although I still have sex, I am not stupid about it. I was lucky once, I am not taking anymore chances.

7. I was raised Catholic and went to a Catholic school for 12 years. I only thought my sexuality was wrong the first year I realized it was happening, ever since I knew that if there is a God, he doesn't care who I love.

8. I actually keep tabs of who I've slept with in an Excel document and it adds it up automatically for me... (business major).

9. I want to fall in love again. I want to get married and have kids and I'd like to find who I can do that with right now.

10. I am incredibly annoyed by the gay community and their demand for respect, but half don't respect themselves enough to not go half naked down the street for "Gay Pride." I believe respect is earned even though we should have the same civil rights, we do not and we have to work to earn that.

11. I use the terms gay, queer, and fag/faggot daily and think it's funny when other people say them and think that it offends me. Say whatever you want. Freedom of speech is beautiful.

12. Although I don't follow the Church anymore, I still think that sex ruins most relationships and if I meet someone important enough I will do whatever it takes to not have sex until we are married or whatever it is we can have.

13. Most people have no idea that I am gay and some people require me to tell them I am several times. I see no reason to make my sexuality the first thing someone sees about me, instead they should see who I am before I'm encumbered with any preconceived notions of the gay community.

14. Although I don't think I'm damned for being gay, I still wish I were straight sometimes. It would make my life so much easier. (That being said with no history of negative reactions.)

15. This is all out of order but I don't really care. I started masturbating when I was about 9, I think. I may have been closer to 10, but my stepbrother showed me porn at a very young age.

16. When I realized I was gay I thought it was because while I masturbated I had accidentally thought about men, so I would try to think about women... but it never worked.

17. I am a hopeless romantic.

18. When I am in love I will do anything for him.

19. Sometimes I worry that I will never be able to find someone to stay in a relationship with me and I'll end up just being a creepy old man hitting on guys 20 years younger than me.

20. I still am not over a boy I was with over a year ago. Every time I hear the song "I Won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz I think of him. We were supposed to make Christmas goodies last winter while we were going to the same uni.

21. I recently had a sexual encounter that should be added to the script of the next "Eating Out" movie.

22. Sometimes I feel like I never want to have sex again, and I won't for a few weeks, then I end up texting a booty call.

23. I like to be choked during sex sometimes, I recently found this out... it makes things really intense.

24. I want nothing more than to grow old with someone. I want to live on the beach with them.

25. Shit is fucked, relationships will suck, but one day someone will be worth the bullshit. I know it either from the movies or I actually believe it.

1. I am an eighteen-year-old female of undefined sexuality.

2. I have struggled with my sexuality for three years, going through stages of lesbianism, bisexuality and asexuality as well as being both panromantic and hetero-romantic. It was extremely frustrating for me having no definitive sexuality. It's only in the last couple of months that I have been happy to remain undefined, but it's still frustrating from time to time. I feel like I can't affirm to my family my sexuality until I have a concrete sexuality to admit to, as when I first came out as gay aged 16 my mother thought I was attention-seeking and my father laughed. Any other conversations with my family about my LGBT activities have lead to laughter and confusion, and so I've given up trying to say anything.

3. I have had three long term partners, and estimate around 40-50 sexual partners. I'm fairly open about the number of encounters I've had, as I don't see anything shameful in being promiscuous.

4. I enjoy sex, and have two fuck buddies, both male. I have fun with both of them despite them differing vastly in skill and size. I choose to have longer-term sexual partners because, whilst depression means that I'm not in the right frame of mind to have a full-blown relationship, I get all the physical affection and attention I need from regularly seeing these people.

5. My first sexual experience was when I was fourteen. I had my first kiss and fuck when I was raped at a party organized by an older friend. The traumatic way I lost my virginity made me devalue myself for many years, and my promiscuity in this period was more due to mental exasperation than my current reasons. I have been date-raped twice since.

6. Penetrative sex is extremely painful for me, but has no medical diagnosis. Alcohol numbs the pain considerably, however it makes sober PIV sex impossible. Luckily I've had numerous sexual partners who don't mind and have been content with other ways of me pleasuring them. I class "sex" as anything leading up to a sexual encounter: oral, anal, fingering. We think that perhaps I am too tight, and so I have a project to loosen myself up a little.

7. I am hugely into BDSM, enjoying both the dominating and the subordinate roles. I have only recently found my dominant side with one of my partners, who has also recently discovered his masochistic side. I hope to try everything with him, because a lot of guys I've met have been unwilling to try such things and prefer to dominate me.

8. I don't enjoy masturbation.

9. I have had sexual fantasies since I was fourteen years old (pre-trauma). A particularly dominant one was of being a slave in a sex dungeon, as well as rape fantasies. I often wonder if I didn't bring my rapes on myself by wishing for these things.

10. I have a diary in which I keep records of all of my sexual encounters, disastrous or otherwise. I often read them back and it's so visceral I can feel it.

11. My ex-girlfriend of three months was a nymphomaniac. It is with her that I experienced most of my lesbian experiences, including a five-girl encounter. She eventually dumped me because I couldn't keep up with her.

12. I love being punished, to the extent that I will defy my partner to the point that s/he has to punish me. In the same way I love it when a submissive partner fights for control.

13. I have been told by seven people that I have given them the best oral sex of their lives. I love making boys cum in my mouth and swallowing. It makes me sad that a lot of guys don't believe that I can love blowjobs that much, and also that a lot of guys I know have never had an active female partner -- instead saying that the girls they've been with have just lain there and taken it. Just the sounds they make as it gets more intense make me smile. My ex says I have something of an oral fixation.

14. Despite my obsession with pain, I can't stand asphyxiation or collars, because I was strangled repeatedly as a child.

15. I find ankles, wrists and collarbones especially sexy. I like tying them up and biting them.

16. I have never orgasmed in my life, and instead get my kicks out of making people come. People always see me as a challenge, which I actually hate. Despite wanting to orgasm, phrases like that make me feel like a prize or a piece of meat. Even when being someone's "slave," I still feel like a person with control, so that outlook rubs me the wrong way.

17. I love cuddles, but not straight after sex. I do, however, like to talk post-coitus. I think talking about the sex you've just had leads to better sex in the future, especially if the other person didn't want to protest during the act - this way I don't make the same mistake twice which is important to me as I always put their enjoyment above my own (since their enjoyment is my enjoyment).

18. My first boyfriend broke my confidence to such a low unlike any other, and both of my other long term relationships I still class as rebounds, despite them being really good for me. It is with my last partner that I got my confidence up to its record high. I am so grateful to him and we are still good friends. As my Master he had a bond of trust with me beyond any I have with my family, and I trust him more than anyone else in the world.

19. I often think I am promiscuous as revenge at my father for being a terrible parent.

20. I really want to get into porn or prostitution, but the pain during sex stops me from doing so. I hope that one day that the pain subsides so I can get into this work before I get too old.

21. I have a brilliant fuck buddy who lets me try out all my dirtiest thoughts. Our next encounter we plan to try pegging, and his willingness for me to overpower him despite his superior strength is extremely sexy to me. I think I find boys and girls defying their social gender roles incredibly attractive just as I don't see myself conforming to my own social constructs as a woman.

22. I have size 34F breasts but rarely show them in public. I wear T shirts and jumpers so I don't get hit on just for my boobs. Anyone who does see them gets a (quote) "pleasant surprise." Despite this, plus wearing minimal make up, I get just as much attention on a night out or just around as anyone I know who goes out dolled up.

23. I love having sex in weird places. I once met a guy on a four-hour train journey and had sex in the toilets near us.

24. As for the example in (23), I gave him a fake number afterwards. I have an obsession with "perfect encounters": If I have a night with great conversation, great sex, and great personality, I don't want to see that person again for fear of ruining the perfect night I just had. Friends say this is an unhealthy way to live, but, especially with my depressive need to be single, it is probably the best for me at my age.

25. I love to be worshiped completely and utterly.

1. I'm a 21 year old woman who identifies myself as straight. I've had sex with 8 men and 1 woman.

2. I've had two long-term relationships that lasted for years, but I have now been single for 1.5 years. Since this is the first time I've been single for a very long time, I've been quite promiscuous. I've had my first ONS's, fuck buddies and so on.

3. I've explored a lot of different activities in bed with my exes. Anal sex, rimjobs, heaps of different positions, toys and such. I feel that most of it has been more for the sake of checking it off some achievement list of things to do before you die than for the actual pleasure itself. I don't feel ashamed or regretful about anything, though--quite the opposite. I figure that I won't know what I like until I've tried it.

4. I find it really hard to get an orgasm. It's time-consuming and tedious work, and I feel pressured if my sex partner decides he wants to spend 2 hours trying to get me off. I can easily orgasm while masturbating on my own, though, especially in the shower but also with fingers and/or toys (even though activities outside the shower tend to take a bit longer.) When I'm having sex I usually decide early on if I want to "aim" for an orgasm. Often it doesn't feel like it's worth it, as it feels like too much work. I wish that it would "just happen," but I really have to have the right mindset and the sex must involve the right type of stimulation for any magic to happen.

5. I do, however, really like anal sex. Anal sex tends to get me off quite easily, ironically enough. Anal sex in combination with rubbing my clit works like a charm and I can even get off a bit too fast. The problem with this, however, is that I am a victim of shame. I feel bad and dirty for actually liking anal, and I've decided not to have anal sex with anyone that I'm not in a steady relationship with. This means that sex with strangers, fuck buddies and so on usually ends with just the guy getting off. I wish that I wouldn't feel any shame for my kink, as it would make my sex life much more enjoyable.

6. I want to be submissive during sex. I do not care much for BDSM activities, but I like when the guy is a bit rough on me. If I'm not submissive, I just feel out of place and weird during sex, even though I am capable of taking the dominant side. Both of my exes weren't very dominant in bed, and even though the sex was great and I had an orgasm almost every time we had sex, I still felt a bit grossed out and unattracted to both of them because of how they couldn't take on the dominant role very well. When I asked for them to be more dominant, they both seemed to think I meant by being rough and doing some BDSM-kinks. I didn't think it felt right, since none of them had the right mindset for it and I could notice all too well how they were faking it.

7. I regret some of the sex I've had during the time I've been single. Mostly because it was too impulsive, and while I did feel horny at the time and thought it was worth it back then, I just feel dirty and bad now. Mostly because the few people I regret aren't all that attractive, however vain it may sound.

8. Out of all the people I've been with these 1.5 years, I have just been genuinely attracted to one of them. The others have just been for some spontaneous horniness in combination with willingness to explore. But there is one guy that have really driven me crazy. It felt like "lust at first sight," and when I actually got him in bed, he was genuinely dominant and great. I quickly developed a huge crush on him and I still yearn for him.

9. When it comes to whether size matters, I feel that a huge dick is more aesthetically appealing than a small one. About half of the guys I've been with have had big ones, including both of my exes.

10. I've been watching a lot of porn since I was around 11 years old. My tastes for pornography have gotten more and more perverted every year. I've gone from watching vanilla sex to things such as fist-fucking and public BDSM/humiliation. I mostly watch straight porn, but sometimes also watch gay (male) porn as well just for the sake of the anal sex. I do not watch a lot of lesbian porn, since it's too vanilla, and femdom porn just doesn't work for me.

11. The sex I look back on with a dreamy smile is never those times where I've done kinky, perverted stuff. I feel that the porno types of sex I've had felt mechanical and just weren't that awesome. Instead, I look back with a smile on times where I've had simple but nice sex. Usually the best part with it has been how I've felt very present and into it, which just doesn't happen all that often.

12. My fondest sex memory right now is of when of the times me and the guy from #8 had sex. I was laying in my bed on my stomach. He lay on top of me, pushing his crotch against my pussy, dragged down my panties, and lay me down in the spoon position. He put his hand around my neck and chin, stuck a finger in my mouth while fucking me. Compared to a lot of the sex I've had, this feels very vanilla. But as I stated before, the fact that everything felt so present and awesome at the time makes me yearn for more.

13. I'm okay in my body. I've got bad proportions that don't look right compared to today's ideals, but I feel okay with it anyway. I usually just think that if a guy has gone through the pain of trying to get me in bed, he already probably has an idea of how I look naked and is okay with it. Which makes me feel even more comfortable in my naked body, even though my "rational" self feels that there's many "wrongs" with it.

14. I sometimes consider it a possibility to get involved in an open relationship in the future. I have never cheated on any of my partners, and I've never even had any want for having sex with anyone else than the person I've had a relationship with. I do, however, feel that I am more than just sex, and think I could feel comfortable in an open relationship if I met a guy I liked that wanted to have that type of relation.

15. I've had some threesome experiences (2 girls, 1 guy), though they just involved oral and fingers.

16. During one of my threesome experiences, I had sex with a girl. We were both heavily intoxicated and I don't think I did a good job, considering the large amount of alcohol I had that night. It was altogether an interesting experience, though.

17. I consider myself straight. I find women beautiful and sexually attractive, but I don't think I'd be able to develop feelings for one.

18. I think it's hard to say no. Not to SAY no, but to get the guy to understand I really mean it. I've gotten into a lot of sexual situations that I haven't really wanted to be in, and when I have said "no," "stop," or "I don't want to do this," the boys seems to think I'm talking some backwards language since they keep going. I will usually have to keep telling them to stop while trying to resist at least 10 times before they actually take me seriously. I'm not sure why that is, as I'm generally not the type that says "no" when I mean "yes."

19. I can't stand dirty talk. I just start to giggle and get awkward when a guy tries to start up some role play or talk dirty with me. I can, however, communicate what I want by simply telling so. But somehow I feel that the words sounds better in English than in my native language, probably because of all the porn I've watched. Whenever I want to say something in bed that involves vulgar words, I think twice to come up with a good way to say it in my native tongue without it sounding too cheesy.

20. I can't stand receiving oral sex. While I love to give oral, I don't find receiving very interesting. It doesn't feel that much, I find the position awkward and the whole thing is just boring to me. While I've been with a lot of guys that love giving oral, this creates a problem. While I've always said to them that I'd prefer to not get licked, many insist. Which just leads me to just waiting for him to finish his little cunnilingus project while I either do some vague and quiet fake moaning or try to break it ASAP just to get it over with, depending on the situation.

21. I have, however, never faked an orgasm.

22. I don't know how my sex drive is compared to other women's. I feel like my sex drive goes up and down for periods of time. Sometimes I masturbate daily, other times I just do it a couple of times a month. Me and my first boyfriend had sex at least 4 times a week, which I did feel was a bit much. I wish I had a higher drive that was more consistent.

23. Multiple guys have told me that I give the best blowjobs they have ever had. I first thought they exaggerated or just wanted to be nice, but now that I've heard it so many times I guess I should take it seriously. I like giving blowjobs and trying different techniques to find out what different guys react best to, I guess my joy for discovery is a part of my "skills."

24. I can't orgasm from just penetration, neither can I squirt. I have tried different techniques to make it happen, but it haven't worked.

25. I can masturbate to just about anything. I usually don't think about anything special while doing it, and I don't have to watch anything special either. I just get randomly horny and start to touch myself. But it's not that easy when it comes to sex. I find it hard to get turned on just like that, and with most people I need some foreplay. I do not, however, find that foreplay that involves some kissing is enough. I need a lot more aggressive touching and especially on my erogenous parts. The one guy that have gotten me genuinely turned on though, didn't need to perform any special preparations, as his very presence made me soaking wet and longing for sex.

1.      I am an 18-year-old cisgender female in the USA. I call myself panromantic and pansexual. Romantically, I can see myself in a relationship with any gender, even though I have never been in a relationship with anyone but cisgender males. Sexually, I am open to everyone regardless of sex or gender, although I find myself to be more often physically attracted to men. But generally I don’t like dealing with labels. I like who I like, and that’s that.

2.      My first time having PIV sex was when I was 16 with my boyfriend (18) at the time. We had sex in the passenger seat of his car on New Year’s Eve. Everyone had told me it was a big deal to lose my virginity and that it should be special. After it happened, I was hardly affected. I understand how it can be a big deal to some people, but to me, it was just another experience. Other times were much more memorable.

3.      I went on birth control pills shortly after losing my virginity. Not to regulate my period, not to help my skin. I went on birth control because I didn’t want to get pregnant. I got it from the Teen Health Center at my school. When I told my mom I’d had sex, she said she would rather I didn’t have sex, but she told me that if I am going to be doing adult activities, I had to make adult decisions. So birth control. I recently had an IUD put in, since I will be going to college in the fall and I want reliable birth control that I won’t have to remember to take every day.

4.      I have had PIV sex with 2 guys. The first one was a boyfriend, as said above. The most recent one is someone who considers me as just a friend.

5.      I have had sexual contact (fingering, oral sex, “third base”) with 5 guys (this number includes the guys I’ve had PIV sex with). 3 were boyfriends. I have kissed 7 guys; 4 were boyfriends. Just throwing some numbers around, probably unnecessarily.

6.      Between my two sexual partners, I had a 9-month break without sex with a boyfriend in between (6 months, no sex, everything but). After that relationship ended, I sought someone to have sex with as a hook-up or “fuck buddy” type relationship. I ended up getting to “third base” with a guy and we ended up just not having sex. I had a few weeks before beginning a sexual relationship with my friend.

7.      I didn’t really crave sex until after my 6-month relationship ended. I went about 7 months without any sex and I was fine.  After getting my IUD inserted, I didn’t have sex for 2 weeks because of the irregular bleeding, and I craved sex the entire time. I thought this sudden craving for sex was surprising, considering it didn’t bother me during the longer time span. I don’t know if this is because the sex is better with my friend, it’s just chance, or if I’ve just been way hornier. Whichever way, body cravings are strange.

8.      I have never had the opportunity to have sex with a woman, but I have made out with 2. One was when I was 12 or 13 and she was one of my best friends at the time. We had a sleepover, both said we didn’t understand the big deal about first kisses, and started kissing. The other is my friend’s girlfriend. We made out in front of him a few times just for entertainment's sake.

9.      I have always been very confident in myself and my sexuality. I’ve always been very open to expressing my sexuality and intimate details about my life. I have very few things that are complete secrets. I like giving people advice, and I answer almost any question people ask me about my sex life. I really enjoy talking about sex, and I think I often make people uncomfortable because I am so comfortable talking about a subject many consider taboo.

10.     I started masturbating really early. I think I was probably about 6 or 7. I remember touching myself and humping a pillow and knowing it felt good. I didn’t know what I was doing, but it felt good, so could it be wrong? I think I began consciously masturbating at about 12 or 13. The number of times I masturbate in a week varies a lot. Sometimes it will be once a day, and other times it will be once every week or two.

11.     According to most of my friends, I’m a big flirt. I flirt with almost all of the guys I know, even though I’m not sexually or romantically attracted to them. There are a few guys I know I do not flirt with for different reasons. My “friend zone” is very small and difficult to get into. I flirt because it’s fun. But I’m such an outgoing person that often my advances are taken as flirting versus me just being friendly and open. I am also a very touchy person, though. I hug everyone, and I awkwardly stroke my friends and hold their hands because it’s fun. I do all of this, but then I lead people on. I have rejected quite a few people, and I feel sad that the friendships I had with those people will never be quite the same.

12.     As open as I am about my sex life and history and the factual aspects of my life with everyone, I find it really hard to talk about romantic feelings with a person I am romantically interested in. Sounds stupid, doesn’t it? I should just learn how to tell people how I feel. It would make having sexual relationships easier if the people knew how I honestly felt.

13.     I have always liked the idea of casual sex. Sex without strings, not having to worry about the other person's feelings. I think it’s an excellent way to release and express oneself, but I don’t think it should replace committed relationships, as I enjoy having one person to have sex with as well as enjoy the company of. And there is something special about having meaningful sex.

14.     That being said, I don’t think I could ever truly do a “friends with benefits” relationship type thing and have it work long term. I’ve never had a “fuck buddy,” but I’m fairly certain I could maintain that kind of set up. I like the idea of having a good friend that you just happen to be sleeping with. The only way I could do a “friends with benefits” thing would be if I was allowed to sleep with other people and the other person wasn’t. Otherwise I would get jealous. I’d rather have a “friends with benefits” relationship that was exclusive. But if I had an emotional or mental connection with the person, I would start to develop romantic feelings for him or her. This is what I’ve experienced in my “friends with benefits” (if I had to label it, for lack of a better term) type relationship I’ve had.

15.     The idea of period sex really grosses me out. I shouldn’t be grossed out by my own body, but for some reason, having sex on my period sounds unappealing. I have had sex while I was on my period ONCE, and I said “ew” the entire time. I doubt I will do it again (at least until I’m in a long-term monogamous relationship).

16.     I think the idea of having a threesome sounds fun. I don’t know if it’s a fantasy, but it’s something I hope to get a chance to do. I’d love to have the opportunity. I think having either 2 men or having 1 guy and 1 girl plus me both sound fun.

17.     I haven’t experienced bondage, but I think it’s really hot. I’m not into hardcore BDSM, but I’m really turned on by the idea of having my hands tied or being blindfolded. I really like the idea of being restrained. It sounds so hot, not being able to use my hands to express how I’m feeling. I like the idea of being blindfolded and having to rely on other senses to feel what’s going on.

18.     I like it rough sometimes. Sometime I’d like to be pushed down on the bed or up against a wall and fucked.

19.     I have never liked blowjobs. They just aren’t pleasant and not fun. But recently I discovered, while spending time with my friend, that I do like giving blowjobs if I’m in the right mood for it and if I have the right kind of connection with the person.

20.     I don’t like being eaten out. I don’t know if this is because the one guy that has ever done it wasn’t good at it or if it’s because I just don’t like it. But I didn’t find it to be anything special. It wasn’t unpleasant, but it did nothing for me. I got bored.

21.     Anal is something that has always sort of scared me. I would be open to trying it at some point in my life, but I’m worried I’ll tear something. Plus the idea of fecal matter getting everywhere seems kind of gross to me. But who knows, I’ll never know unless I try it.

22.     I understand that boobs are fun to play with. But not very often does having my boobs touched turn me on or feel like anything better than just having my boobs touched. I’d rather have my neck kissed and touched. I know a lot of people that think this is gross and weird, but it’s actually just really hot. I like having my neck sucked on. It feels good.

23.     I have never had sex under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

24.     I love the sound of people climaxing. It’s amazingly hot to hear a person completely let go in the heat of the moment. I don’t like the overly exaggerated sounds porn stars make, but listening to someone masturbating or having sex is a really big turn on.

25.     Finally… I’ve never orgasmed. Sex, masturbation, etc. all still feel really good, but I don’t get that mind-blowing feeling and the huge release that supposedly people feel. I feel a point where the good feeling reaches a maximum point before falling back down, but I can just sort of decide when I want/need to stop. I hope at some point in the future I will be able to experience the orgasm that everyone raves about.

1. I am a cisgendered male who is 30, and I identify as queer, but I am mostly into women. But I feel attraction to all genders and most sexualities.

2. I absolutely love making out and would like to do it more with my partners when I have them, but I feel like after a certain point after we start dating it goes out the window, and I'm not sure why. That being said I find women to generally be better kissers than men.

3. I've never been in a relationship or really had sex with someone if our attraction isn't really intense right off the bat. I'd like to start a relationship slowly, but I don't know how and I don't know if it's possible.

4. I think #3 relates to my codependent tendencies.

5. Identifying as queer has been an interesting journey. I've never felt 100% straight, but I can't really see myself in a relationship with anyone but women. Sometimes I wonder if I am just experimenting and I am really just a regular hetero person

6. I find androgynous women really attractive. It doesn't matter if they are gay, straight or whatever. It can be really distracting at times.

7. I want to be in a relationship pretty badly, but part of me is afraid it will be just like my (now over) marriage, and I couldn't handle that. Because of that, I am very aware of what I don't want in a relationship.

8.  I don't fear dying. I think that has caused me to make some risky choices. That and a good bit of loneliness.

9. I sometimes think I think about my sexuality too much. This website helps me to know I am not the only one. Unfortunately, I don't really know how to put myself in a position to act on the things I want to do.

10. I really like being pegged and anal play in general, both giving and receiving.

11. I also love eating pussy, especially having my face sat on.

12. Having sex outside is incredibly hot. Possibly getting caught isn't really part of it for me, more a sense of being connected to the world in an intimate way. Also, walking by the location and reminiscing.

13. I can only really enjoy sex with someone if I have an affection for them. Not necessarily being in a relationship but I have to be able to consider them a friend.

14. I've met someone off of Craigslist for sex. It was not as satisfying as I thought it would be and I kind of regret doing ti. I did it mostly out of boredom.

15. I really want to try sex with multiple people at once.

16. My porn habits vary, but there is a theme of viewing porn that is similar to the last sexual encounter I had.

17. I am getting into bondage more and more. The act of tying someone up and taking control over the agency of a person turns me on. Tying up a woman and doing whatever I like (that was previously negotiated) is an incredible feeling.

18. I also like being tied up and dominated by a woman. Being slapped, choked and bitten are a few of my favorites. Humiliation, not so much.

19. I am totally fascinated by the female form. I feel it can be the ultimate in evolutionary development. All the curves are beautiful and amazing. They can be as complex and beautiful as the person contained within them.

20. There is something great about the male form as well, but I'm not quite sure I can explain my attraction to it.

21. I would love to learn shibari. The symmetry is beautiful. It only kind of turns me on, but aesthetically it completely floors me.

22. Most porn bores the shit out of me. I like homemade stuff a lot. Also, for some reason, casting couch porn. I think it is the power imbalance that does it for me.

23. Sometimes I masturbate when I'm bored. I'm usually still bored after.

24. I have a hard time achieving orgasm the first time I'm with someone. I'm not sure why that is, sometimes it's the first few times I'm with someone. I am really self-conscious about it. I can be really turned on but not feel much of anything, despite being really hard.

25. I find really random things about people sexy for limited amounts of time. For a while it was eyebrows, and recently it has been nose rings.

1. I'm an eighteen-year-old bisexual female, with a strong preference for women. I found out that I was bisexual when I was fourteen. I stole a girl's shoe during lunch, and ran to one of the teacher's rooms when few people were around. She had me on my back when I told her I wouldn't give it to her unless she kissed me. When she did, I just sort of went limp, and she walked away the victor. When I went home, I looked up a ton of lesbian porn and masturbated furiously.

2. I started looking at porn when I was ten years old, on the dare of a friend. I quickly developed a need for it. I started masturbating a few months later, after I discovered my genitals were sensitive in a good way. We played doctor once, but mistook our anuses for vaginas.

3. Probably my first crush was a girl in kindergarten, but I didn't realize it. She had curly red hair and freckles, and prominent front teeth. I always wanted to be around her. By the time I was fourteen, her birthday presents to me had become hugs, which I savored deeply. I always wanted to kiss her, but she grew up in a very Christian home, and whenever she heard the term "gay," she sneered and averted her eyes.

4. I used to keep a boy as a pet at school. He was much smaller than me, but we were the same age. After class, I would take him behind the buildings and force him against a brick wall and attack his neck. It made him very uncomfortable. I also tied him to chairs, which he did like, and declared him no longer male before my friends on multiple occasions. I didn't want to be caught dead with a male called a "boy." I found them utterly repulsive.

5. The men in my family gave me low opinions of mankind. An uncle screwed one of my cousins and cheated on his wife, another married a woman for her looks and was back-stabbed when she divorced him and took all his cash, and my father used to yell at my mother and brother. He broke down my brother's door in an argument, and my brother once threatened me that he would burn the house and kill us all. The police were called twice, that I recall. Even now, it's hard to be with my boyfriend, who is also my dear friend, simply because I'll remember how scary men can be.

6. Gay porn is pretty much all there is, for me. I don't really understand why someone would look at heterosexual porn, because I think, "But another sex is there? Why would you muddle it like that?"

7. I used to steal porn comics from the local bookstore because Playboy objectified women and the gay mags were made for men. My mother found my collection next to my bed and threw them in the fireplace. Another time, she went through my book bags and found a gay novel. She took it out back. I assumed she threw it in the outside trash. She repeatedly asked me, "Where do you see yourself in this?!" That was the point; gay male relationships offered no physical mirror for me. For a second or two, I could pretend I was male. I simply didn't want my body or my sexuality reflected in it, if that makes sense.

8. I've never had sex with anyone or anything. Every time I've tried, it hurt too much. The boyfriend and I have always been interrupted before it can get too far, and 95% of the time, I'm immensely relieved. I think it's scary. I haven't had evidence pointing otherwise.

9. Masturbation is never more than rubbing the clitoris. Which is perfectly fine with me, but I've been doing it for eight years, sometimes five times a night, so it's not nearly as sensitive as it used to be.

10. When I do look at PIV porn, it's more T(entacle)IV. I don't like to see men with women unless they're loving, equal, respectful relationships, and I've never seen one of those that I believe.

11. I tell my boyfriend frequently that I prefer women, and that being with a man is very difficult for me. He just kisses me and says "I know." Or, "That's okay." Is it bad that I find that particularly degrading? Like some house pet or a toddler being momentarily placated? Sometimes I recoil from his touch, but it's not about that. I simply can't stand having a man touch me.

12. My first really really real lesbian experience occurred in Paris when I was sixteen. I met a girl who also enjoyed homosexual porn, and I drew and wrote for her about our handsome male teachers. The three days before we left for the summer, I had her tied to the bed, pressed against walls, and bent over chairs. She was straight, though (Texan!), so I had to hide my breasts and put on a deep voice. But I was fine with that. I really liked her. Her brother saw the hickey on her neck when her parents came to pick her up. We never saw each other after that. She went back to Texas.

13. I don't want to be "eaten out," and dislike the term. I'm curious about oral sex, though I despise seeing it in porn if the one giving it is not being mutually pleasured. I can't watch or read something unless the two characters are equal. Maybe that's why I have such issues with heterosexual sex; how many positive stories are out in the open about equal relationships? That's feminism, where I come from.

14. Church for my family was a short fascination. We went and stopped by the time I was five. I tried again when I was fourteen (the year of experimentation!) and attended a service dedicated to teens. I saw fliers declaring homosexuality a sin, and touting special rehabilitation seminars and camps. We were taken to a large room and the girls were told to remove our socks. We sat on a long stage as bowls of cold water were placed at our feet. Men came down the line and dropped grapes in, then told the boys to advance to the stage. They knelt in front of us and the pastor instructed us to feed them grapes with our toes, and that it would be a timed competition. I won some prize, but immediately went home, very disturbed. My mother yelled at me for not calling for a ride, then saw my odd posture and berated me for being on drugs. I went to bed and didn't bother changing clothes.

15. When I was thirteen, I joined the track and cross country teams. I bulked up, cut my hair to ridiculous short curls, and bound my breasts with sports bras, gauze, and athletic tape. One day, when a boy addressed me as "Hey! Girl! Uh, boy! Whatever!" I felt a different, surreal kind of accomplishment. I was gender-neutral. Underclassmen started calling me "he-she" in the halls, and I wore a neutral uniform with shorts.

16. At eleven, I began menstruation. I hid it from my mother for a few days before she yelled at me and I cried on the couch. I didn't want to be a woman. It looked positively miserable; the end of childhood.

17. People in my old town were raped and murdered. Everybody knew the place by the bowling alley as "Rape Alley." It wasn't until I'd had a close call that all those jokes became very, very wrong to me. I was angry that the police didn't do anything.

18. Even though I'm an atheist, I like stories about angels and faeries and the like. For a long time, I wanted to be male, and then I realized I actually wanted to be asexual. I enjoy masturbation, but I feel like it's just wasting energy, and looking at porn wastes time. Not that I'll stop, of course.

19. I like chubby women in their twenties, thirties, forties. I like pixie cuts, graying hair or dyed, and androgynous, lean bodies. I like small-breasted women and caramel, black, or white skin, and pale birthmarks. I like cuddling naked with women, and pressing our chests together and having a head resting on my shoulder. I like women who wear bulky sweaters and never go out in leggings without a skirt. Humor and kindness and sisterhood are what I'm looking for in this world. I have very few female friends. Women mystify me, and I love them more intensely than I think I like my boyfriend.

20. All of my male friends have kissed me at some point, several times on my would-be boyfriend's bed. But I've hardly kissed my female friends. I'm slightly afraid of them, considering how attractive I find them, and worry that I'll disgrace ourselves by asking if they would.

21. I once tried to start up a threesome with a couple I knew from high school, but the moment I mentioned that I might like to bring in another guy, her boyfriend started in on the "Oh, no, that'd be gay," rant. Then what are two women? Pets? Playthings? I hate people who are willing to take but not give in those situations. I broke it off the second he said it.

22. As a kid, I heard my mother have sex through the wall with her boyfriend. I used to scream and cry for an hour. Call it an Oedipal complex, but I did NOT want anyone fucking my mother. I though she was being dishonored, and that she was dishonoring me.

23. By fourteen I was masturbating to the sounds of their voices.

24. I've attempted to kickstart several relationships with friends I'd come to identify as surrogate "siblings." They gently turned me down and said they loved me too much, or respected me too much. I didn't understand. I had just begun to tentatively think that sex equaled love and respect. The idea was shoved to the back shelf and even now only occasionally resurfaces.

25. I'm always a bit jealous when I read these entries, at least those which detail free and comfortable sex lives. I don't understand the lack of fear; the relaxation; the disregard for dirtying the self. How can people be so comfortable? I know it's experience, but at this rate, I don't even really want that. I have this crazy dream in which I remain a virgin for the rest of my life, like Elizabeth I, and maintain a happy existence with a fun woman and a couple of kids. To please her only would make me happy in the moment, but telling her to not pleasure me as I freely touch her is massive disrespect in my book. I just want for my partner to be happy, but it's always difficult to trust.

1. I am a 31-year-old Midwestern male. I have been married for the past eight years, and the only person I have ever slept with is my wife. We have been together since we were in high school.

2. I lost my virginity at the age of 17. I can remember the experience quite well. I'm afraid I was terribly awkward. We had been fooling around for months beforehand and had gotten reasonably acquainted with one another's bodies. Nonetheless I can't say I was used to being completely naked with her. We spent a couple of hours making out, and I did my best to make her orgasm manually. I remember asking her how far she wanted to go, etc., and finally working up the nerve to penetrate her when she said she wanted me to. I am fairly well endowed, and it took quite a while for me to get all the way inside her. I thrust for about five minutes before she got sore and then we just gave up. The next time we had sex it was a lot more fun.

3. My wife and I are very poorly matched in terms of libido. If it were up to me we'd have sex at least three times a week, if not every day. She, on the other hand, could probably go for years without us having sex and not be bothered by it as long as I gave her a hug now and then. I've approached her about this in every way I know how, and despite a lot of frustration on both of our parts we've never been able to consistently have sex more than one time a week,  and the majority of the time it's more like once every three months.

4. When my wife and I do have sex, it is pretty restrained. I am honestly open to almost anything, whereas she doesn't like to try new things. She doesn't like me to touch her pussy very much - if I'm lucky I get to have my hand down there for about three minutes. We will kiss a lot and then after a little foreplay we'll have sex. Sometimes she'll go down on me, sometimes not. She won't let me eat her out at all no matter how much I beg her to. While we've tried a few positions the only one she seems to like is missionary. I've never gotten to have sex doggy-style,  and I want to desperately.

5. Our sexual relationship has gotten so strained that I no longer try to initiate sex, despite the fact that she seems to prefer that as opposed to her initiating it. It just makes me so instantly angry when she turns me down now that it's not worth the lost sleep and frustration.

6. Over the past couple of years,  I've spent a lot of time working out and toning my body, running, lifting weights, etc. This has awakened a lot of things in me that I hadn't encountered before or had forgotten about. I lost 70 pounds in the first year I spent running. I find that I have a great deal more self-confidence now and am a great deal more libidinous than I used to be. I also seem to have developed a very keen sense of smell. The smell of my wife's pussy when it's wet drives me mad with lust. Sometimes I think I can smell other women's arousal but I've never had the opportunity to find out if this is real or imagined.

7. I have been masturbating since I was fourteen. Currently, I masturbate between three times a week to every day depending on how much time I have alone. When I get the opportunity I like to masturbate for at least an hour, usually with a fake pussy.

8. I have been looking at porn since I was fourteen whenever I could get my hands on some. I can still remember the first porno I saw. It was of a brunette woman oiling her legs and breasts and talking dirty to the camera. I still remember some of the words she said: "I know what you want to do, you want to play with my pussy. You can. Put your cock in my mouth..." I was so horny you'd swear I had peed my pants with precum.

9. My tastes in porn have changed a lot over the years, and can depend on my mood. When I was younger it was more about what I could get my hands on than what I wanted. I used to enjoy hardcore gonzo-type porn; then I got into cumshots and then creampies. For a while I was into BDSM. Now I just enjoy anything where the women involved really look like they want to be with the guy or gal that they are having sex with. I also enjoy softcore and movies where the woman is teasing the camera while she masturbates.

10. I've been searching for the porno in #8 since I first saw it, and haven't found it yet. Sort of an obsession, I guess.

11. I have experimented with anal toys, and while I enjoy the sensation of being penetrated and having my prostate massaged, I don't like having an orgasm with something in my ass. Seems to take away some of the intensity.

12. I think I would enjoy BDSM to a greater or lesser extent. I fantasize about dominating a woman frequently. I also fantasize about being used by multiple women for their pleasure while I am tied up. I'm not sure how I would respond to pain during sex. I've just never had the opportunity to try it.

13. I would love to try anal sex with a woman, both with me penetrating her and her penetrating me.

14. I identify as heterosexual, as I don't find myself very attracted to men. I occasionally wonder what it would feel like to suck another man's cock or have him suck mine, but I think this is more about curiosity regarding the sensations, tastes, and smells involved than any attraction I would feel.

15. If I had to pick one female body part that I am most attracted to it would be her pussy. I like legs too,  and breasts are great, but nothing gets me hot like the thought of a hot, wet, aroused pussy. I also have a thing for eyes. If a woman has big almond-shaped eyes they just seem to invite you in to gaze at her soul, and yet they consume you at the same time.

16. I often wonder what it would feel like to be with another woman besides my wife. There are so many things I am curious about sexually, she would have to be very open to experimenting with me.

17. I fantasize about being with women that are in great shape, not hugely muscular like a body builder, but hard-bodied nonetheless. I would like to know what it would feel like to fuck someone like that, to feel her sweaty abs grating against mine or her taut slender legs wrapped tightly around me as we fuck against a wall...

18. Despite #17, when I look at porn, I often am most attracted to pictures of women that are more heavyset, not fat or even a little chunky, just well filled-out, especially in the hips or the backs of their legs. I also like larger breasts, unless the woman is Asian, then I would prefer them to be smaller. Maybe this is just about proportion. I don't know.

19. I love being talked dirty to and I would love to learn how to talk dirty. I think it would be enormously liberating to talk dirty to my partner.

20. I would really love to have sex with someone who would make a lot of noise during sex and who would enjoy hearing me moan in pleasure as well. Sex with my wife is always silent, as she rarely makes a sound and she doesn't like it when I do.

21. I would very much like to participate, at least for a while, in a swinging lifestyle. I'm not sure how I would feel about someone else being with my wife, but I'm sure that the opportunity to be with other women would outweigh any negative feelings I might have about her being with another guy.

22. I have always fantasized about what it might be like to participate in an orgy. If I ever get a divorce I will probably go looking for a FWB type of relationship with a woman I could take to swinging events or clubs so that I can experience this.

23. Recently, my wife and I nearly separated over the lack of sex in our marriage, as well as a number of other issues. We decided not to,  largely because of the impact it would have on our children and our finances. At first the idea seemed like a good one to both of us, but as we got more serious about it, we would get into long drawn out arguments that would leave both of us exhausted. I looked at a couple of apartments that were pretty dismal, and the dating pool around here is really small... The whole thing got too painful, and so we're still together. I think that if there had been another woman for me to run to or at least a decent place to go, it probably would have happened.

24. I have been reading this blog for the past two weeks. It has opened my eyes to so many things. Maybe it's just that my wife is so repressed sexually, but I hadn't expected to see so many entries from women. I find all of the posts fascinating. It's good to know there are other people out there that are as horny as me.

25. Strangely, I thought writing these 25 things would make me really horny, but it hasn't. Actually, it's been surprisingly reflective,  and seems to have clarified a few things for me regarding how I view my desires and what drives certain portions of them. I'll probably still need to masturbate now, though.

1. I am a 20 year old woman, though I feel much older than that, from San Francisco but currently residing in Europe. I identify as straight.

2. I have had more sex partners, all male, than I can accurately count, though I think the number is somewhere north of 30. This tally has been amassed in only 3 years. If the topic comes up I try to act ashamed or mysterious because my number is not socially acceptable. Truthfully, I just like to have sex and haven't been in a monogamous relationship in which I can have a whole lot of it with one person.
 

3.The first time I masturbated to orgasm occurred when I was 16. It was my first real foray into touching myself, thanks to my long-distance boyfriend of the time who wanted to have phone sex. Funnily enough, we didn't really discuss sex, it was mostly about kissing and manual action.

4. I lost the best friend I have ever had when I was a teen because after we made out and touched each other she discovered she was lesbian and was too afraid to say anything to me. I consider myself straight, but she might have been the one woman in the world I would have been willing to try dating.

5. I am curvy, with large boobs and an ass. Some people, including my mother, think I should lose weight. And some people, like the man I am currently seeing, think I am beautiful just the way I am. I work very hard to think so too.
 

6. What I am really looking for is a romantic relationship. However, perhaps because of number 5, men predominantly see me as a sex object. And, because I like to have sex, I have difficulty discerning the difference between a man who has a high sex drive and wants a relationship versus a man who just wants me for sex.
 

7. I used to rub my crotch against my stuffed animals when I was just reaching puberty because it gave me sexual pleasure. It also made me feel deeply guilty.
 

8. I feel a lot more mature than the men of my age group, to the point of not being able to feel any substantial sexual attraction towards them. I date older than myself, by about an average of ten years. Wisdom and experience are so, so sexy.
 

9. My first experience with vaginal penetration sex was when I was 17. It was a friend of a friend and I lied about being a virgin when he asked.
 

10. I once hooked up with a man who I believe had OCD. He put on surgical gloves when fingering me and used copious amounts of hand sanitizer, both on him and me, afterwards. At the time I was a little weirded out, but now I just feel sorry for him. Sex is so much more fun when you can let go and be a little messy!
 

11. I like to be submissive in bed. I am so driven and determined in my life, it is nice to be able to trust a man to take over. Something about it feels very natural.
 

12. Unfortunately, on my journey of discovering my submissive side I came across a few very aggressive, manipulative dominants. I did a few things I really wasn't comfortable with and still eek me out when I think about them.
 

13. Sex didn't hurt the first time and has only ever hurt with men who are too long for my vagina. My vagina and ass are both extremely accommodating, I need a decent-sized penis to be sexually satisfied.

14. In fact, my vagina is so accommodating I have enjoyed fisting. The orgasms from the few times I have tried it have been insane.
 

15. My entire body shakes during a satisfying orgasm. Sometimes I joke that they are earthquakes because I am from San Francisco. Oh well, at least I think I'm funny.
 

16. The man I am currently seeing also gets the shakes when orgasming, sometimes even more violently than I do. When I discovered this I decided we might just be perfect for each other.
 

17. I went to a swingers' party this past year with a guy I was seeing at the time. I was surprised at how everyone looked like they were putting on a show. It felt more fake to me than a lot of porn.
 

18. I have had sex with a few Italians, being an expat, and the experiences were far from rewarding. Don't believe everything that you hear, the Italian stallion stereotype included.
 

19. I have a difficult time with social situations and do not like dating multiple men at once. It makes me feel beyond exhausted, and I really just want to be monogamous.

20. Yet I am an incredibly giving person and I know what I have to offer might be construed as overwhelming. I fear that I will never find someone with the same capacity.
 

21. I've always loved knowledge, and so I researched sex endlessly as a teen. After my first blow job, my boyfriend of the time didn't believe that it had been my first time. Really, I just used the tips I read on the internet.
 

22. In fact, I find most men are surprised by my sexual prowess. I'm never quite sure if it is a compliment or a judgement.
 

23. I have thought about becoming a prostitute because sex is something I like to do and I've been told I'm good at. I even put up an ad on Craigslist once but when I met the guy I ended up refusing his money. We even dated for a while.
 

24. Sometimes I cry after masturbating. I don't know if this is just a physical release or because I am really lonely.
 

25. Finding a balance of love and sex in my life is one of my major priorities. I think writing this list has helped me move towards this balance.

1. I’m 22 years old and I'm from Spain. I’m a female (congenital/birth/biological sex). I’m a woman (institutional/social sex). But I’m genderless. Let me explain: I conceptualize gender as a socially constructed set of roles and expectations. I believe that mainstream conceptions of what is “feminine” and what is “masculine” have ZERO weight on what I do, say, think, wear…

2. I was 16 or so when I started to really think about feminist and gender issues. I then started to reject all things feminine because they appeared to me as symbols of male chauvinist oppression. I tried to become "neutral," but by doing so I adopted stereotypically masculine gender roles. Fortunately, those days of femmephobia and male-centrism have long been over.

3. I was 15 or so when I reached the logical conclusion that I must be bisexual. The thinking process went like this: “So... see, I’m not shallow! I wanna like and love people for who they are, not because of their bodies. Wait, that must mean I shouldn’t care whether people have penises or vaginas. Then I must be bisexual!”. It actually took a little longer than that, but you get the idea. And I had been having interest in kissing my close girl friends for a while. But I didn’t find a girl that I actually LIKED until age 17. She’s my best friend now.

4. I do not identify as bisexual anymore. I am pansexual because I recognize there are (and I can be attracted to) more than two sexes and/or two genders. On a related note, I am also an activist for trans, non-binary genders, and intersex/diversex/sex-divergence issues; really, for sex and gender diversity in general.

5. I had my first sexual contact at age 13. I was 14 when I had my first PIV sex, I guess.

6. I say “I guess” because the act of “losing my [PIV] virginity” actually had like three phases. So I was dating this one guy, and once we kind of had sex. I say kind of because I’m not sure his penis actually went in, or how much of it actually went in. We were kind of at that point when we realized there was blood everywhere. But the thing is, I don’t know if the blood came from the breaking of the hymen, or from random bleeding that I would get sometimes in the middle of my menstrual cycle. Both are feasible.

7. In the second phase, the problem was that the guy had a HUGE dick. Only one brand of XXL condoms would fit him, and they were really tight. So he did put his dick in me quite a few times, but it took a lot of concentration and muscle relaxation. And the one time I could handle it the longest, he only got to thrust four times. So we could never really "fuck," you know? It was painful. He was a very sweet, loving and somewhat shy guy, though.

8. And then I met this guy when I was 15; having sex with him really felt like a "first time." Then we dated for almost 10 months. We lived kind of far away but would meet every weekend and have sex in his car.

9. My longest relationship has been with a cis woman, and it lasted almost a year. I had three relationships of about 10 months with three different cis men before that. I’ve had some shorter ones too. Also, I’ve had sex with around 60 people up until today.

10. Once, one of those men and I did the math, and we guesstimated we had had sex (we didn’t define “sex” strictly as “PIV sex”) more than 300 times. And we were only physically together for like 5 of the 10 months we were dating. We lived at a boarding school and we both had roommates, so we would often skip classes to be alone and have sex in the room. We would wake up late at night to go have sex in the bathroom when people were sleeping. We had sex on rooftops, behind buildings, in the art room, on buses, backstage in a theater while dressed up in our dancing costumes... I haven’t been as sexually active with anyone since, and I’m not sure I want to.

11. Then again, I go through pretty varied phases when it comes to my sexuality. Sometimes I love dicks, sometimes I don’t wanna have anything to do with them (that has never happened with pussies, though. Don’t know about divergent/intersex genitalia, never tried). Sometimes I fuck with a new person every week, sometimes I don’t really feel like pursuing someone new for a long time. Sometimes I go nuts if I don’t have sex for two days, sometimes I become almost asexual and don’t even masturbate for months.

12. I think I was 15 when I started to think that what I really wanted were open relationships. I didn’t quite put it in practice for many years, because I lived in a small village, didn’t know how to approach it, had no references or people to learn from, didn’t wanna hurt guys I liked, etc. Long story short, I’ve (relatively) recently started identifying as polyamorous. I don’t know for sure, but I think the relationship model that would work best for me is a triad. I don’t really know if I want to have kids, but for some reason it’s easier for me to imagine myself raising kids as part of a triad than as part of a couple. Also, I don’t think I want to get pregnant myself.

13. Having sex with more than one person at the same time was not something I was interested in a year ago, but I’m extremely curious now. I had my first contact with this last Saturday at a swingers/sex club, but I really need more time and opportunities to explore it. What I really want right now is to have sex with an experienced couple; I feel like I’d really appreciate being with two people who already know and trust each other.

14. It really bothers me that people make so many assumptions based on age. It especially bothers me that sex between an older man and a younger woman is automatically regarded as abusive or involving a power differential. When I was 16 I had sex with a 38-year-old guy (in case anybody worries, the age of sexual consent in Spain is 13. I'll save my opinions about the age of consent for another time). We had sex several times when I was 16 and 17, and then didn’t see each other for a long time because I spent several years abroad. We never lost touch and we are quite good friends now. We had sex yesterday and it was great. He is one of the most respectful, egalitarian and sex-positive people I’ve ever met.

15. My first time with a woman was on my 20th birthday. I had liked some women before, but never went beyond kissing (and that wasn’t because I didn’t want to! It became somewhat frustrating). Anyways, she had been my teacher for one year in high school. It was great! We are good friends now.

16. I used to have many prejudices about BDSM and fetishist practices (especially BDSM). I didn’t understand. Now I not only understand, but respect and even admire many aspects of those sexual subcultures. I’m especially a fan of everything related to consent and negotiation, and I think the vanilla world has much to learn from the BDSM and fetish communities (which in practice overlap a lot) in that respect. However, I am not myself turned on by domination, submission, or pain for pleasure.

17. I never really cared for sex toys until last summer. Now I have a beautiful wooden one, and flexible purple one, and a little bullet vibrator. I wanna buy more when I save some money, namely one made of glass (I love the touch of glass!), a bigger vibrator, and a two-ended dildo, for sharing.

18. I actually prefer fucking people with smaller dicks. They’re easier and more comfortable to give oral sex to, and I like the way they feel inside me.

19. These are some things I find especially beautiful: flat-chested women, Afro hair, red hair, freckles, skinny legs. These are some things that I don’t like very much: tattoos, piercings or in general any kind of jewelery, very big butts, very hairy guys. But in practice, I don’t care much about looks: when I like a person inside, they become physically attractive to me. When someone is hot but also a douche, I recognize they are beautiful, but I won’t be attracted to them.

20. I’m extremely interested in Deaf culture, have Deaf acquaintances and know sign language. I would love to have sex and/or a relationship with a person who also happens to be Deaf.

21. Only once have I had an orgasm JUST from penetration, and I don’t really know how. I always need clit stimulation. My pussy is pretty sensitive, and I don’t like it when people rub my clit really hard, when they suck on it very strongly, when they slap it or when they penetrate me (with fingers, dildos or penises) too fast and hard too early.

22. Not long before I had sex with a woman for the first time, I went through a phase where I watched a lot of lesbian porn while listening to “I kissed a girl” by Katy Perry. I actually think that song objectifies woman-with-woman sex by subjecting it to the male gaze, but whatever. I just liked to play it while I masturbated to women having sex.

23. My nipples are extremely insensitive, almost the least sensitive patch of skin in my body. Ironically, I might feel something if they are touched REALLY lightly. But with normal or harder touch, I feel almost nothing.

24. I have a strange relationship with anal sex. Sometimes I really want it, sometimes not at all. Sometimes my ass will have trouble letting even one finger in. And there was this one time I was sleeping with a guy with whom I’d had sex and tried anal (but failed) the night before, when he woke up with a hard-on and just tried to put his dick in my ass. And it popped right in! With no preliminaries and no extra lubrication! I was very surprised. And came several times.

25. People don’t really understand that, being I’m as promiscuous as I am, I say that I never practice “sex without love.” The key here is my personal definition of “love." To me, love is the opposite of hate. To me, hate is about wanting bad things to happen to someone or something. Therefore, to me, love is about wanting good things to happen to someone or something. I want good things to happen to almost everyone and everything on this planet (my brothers, the trees in my backyard, my country, the environment). And, of course, I especially want good things to happen to the people I have sex with! I care about them, even if I’ve met them that same night. That’s what I mean when I say there’s always love when I fuck. Of course, as I become more intimate with someone and develop a stronger bond with them, that love expands and changes. But because there’s always love all along, I never use the expression “fall in love.”