1. I am a 19-year-old, queer, genderqueer individual.
2. I'm biologically female. Sometimes I am comfortable with this, other times I am not. My partner and I have talked about either of us transitioning. We both say it could happen, but I'm usually pretty content with being a short, small-breasted female who sometimes gets mistaken for a 15-year-old boy.
3. I've been with my current partner for 10 months. We are in a monogamous, committed relationship. I can honestly see it lasting many years, if not my entire life.
4. I had my first kiss with a boy when I was 13. I lost my virginity with my partner when I was 18.
5. For me, queer means that I prefer androgynous people. I can appreciate the "traditional," cis-gendered female form, I just couldn't be in a relationship with one. I'm attracted to gay men, though not sexually.
6. My partner is very androgynous and I love it, even though I know my family and friends don't.
7. My parents and friends think I am a lesbian. Only my partner and people in my online circles know how I truly identify.
8. I love sex. I am horny very often and masturbate almost every day.
9. Masturbating isn't about orgasming for me. I just enjoy touching myself. Though it often does lead me to orgasm.
10. I am completely submissive when having sex. My partner uses a dildo/strap-on on me, goes down on me, and uses her fingers.
11. I once came to orgasm when she was sucking on my stomach.
12. I enjoy porn, but do not go looking for it. I can get off to mostly anything, but I love erotica most.
13. I love just spending time in bed with my partner, or alone.
14. I'm often confused about my sexuality.
15. I like wearing things that my partner finds sexy. She likes me in garter belts and thongs, but also in baggy jeans and plain shirts.
16. I don't really have any interest in fucking someone, or being dominant. I feel as though that sounds selfish, but my partner has no interest in being submissive, so it works out perfectly.
17. I enjoy kinky sex. I love, love being bitten and sucked on and I love having hickeys. I like getting bruises from sex and the idea of getting injured during sex (not seriously, of course). I think I'm too silly a person to participate in role-play. I love dildos and have a bad habit of window-shopping online for them.
18. I started masturbating at a very young age, before I even knew what I was doing. I first penetrated myself when I was 15.
19. My partner and I have discussed the topic of anal, though we haven't done it yet. I'd love to try it once, just to see if I like it or not.
20. I have small breasts, but my partner loves them. She has small hands and they fit perfectly.
21. My partner and I have a 3-year age difference. I see nothing wrong with this.
22. I love "sexting" and talking dirty.
23. I love when I touch my own nipples and they get hard and "bumpy."
24. I knew I was attracted to females when I was about fourteen, but I didn't come out until I was 18.
25. I wish I was braver in experimenting with my gender presentation. People in my town are not liberal and assume everyone is straight.
Friday, May 20, 2011
1. I’m a 22-year-old female who is straight, and has only been with one person who is my current boyfriend. We have been together for about 1 year and four months. My entry will be almost a chronological story, as I find it’s the easiest way to write my experiences. It will also be quite detailed, as I actually don’t have anybody to talk about this stuff with (apart from my boyfriend of course). I’m a private person when it comes to my sex life.
2. I always seemed to have crushes on boys when I was growing up. Every year of school I had a crush on one boy or another. My first crush was on a boy in kindergarten, so I would have been 4, then! However I was very naive, and if one of them showed an interest in me I would shy away completely. When I was 12 I was playing a game with my best friend (a boy, also 12) and my younger sister and I had to hide in a cupboard with my best friend. He ended up kissing my ear and my neck, and at the time I freaked out majorly and didn’t like it at all!
3. I first started masturbating when I was 12/13. I started humping the head of a teddy bear (yes, you heard right!). It felt good but I was always incredibly guilty about it. Sex wasn’t talked about openly in our household and I was always a bit sickened by the way my parents talked about sex with their friends.
4. I was 13 when I had my first orgasm. My sister and I shared a bunk bed at the time and I was on the top bunk. I used the teddy bear pressed between the bed and my clit, and I remember it being the most amazing feeling. It felt too good. I was scared she heard me but to this day I’m not sure. She did catch me humping my bear once in one of the other rooms in the house, and she asked me if I ever came and I lied and said I didn’t. She said she sometimes did the same thing. This is the one and only time we’ve come close to talking about our experiences!
5. Since my first orgasm I’ve used the same technique to masturbate. Basically like pillow humping but instead of a pillow it’s a stuffed toy bear or occasionally a quilt. I especially like it when the nose of the teddy bear is pressed against my clit, and I’ll position the bear on the edge of a chair, or my bed, and I don’t need to move around much, just the pressure is enough to make me come. In fact, disappointingly this is almost the only way I can come, although I do come very quickly and it can be quite intense if I’m turned on enough.
6. The biggest turn-ons for me are reading smutty fanfiction or novels, and watching people in movies and TV having sex and moaning. A few years ago I got into watching Beautiful Agony. I find that site has turned me on more than anything else. I particularly enjoy watching the women come more than men. I’m not homosexual at all, but I think it’s because I’m a woman myself, so I can relate to them and know exactly what they’re feeling. I’m not a fan of porn otherwise. I prefer watching their faces on BA and fantasizing about how they’re masturbating rather than actually seeing how they are.
7. I also have a bit of a fascination with breasts. I don’t want to touch them or anything but I like looking at them. I’ve always compared my breasts with others since mine are quite small and I’ve always been jealous of women who can get cleavage, ‘cause I can’t!
8. It took me the longest time before I was brave enough to finger myself. Sounds crazy but I was always a bit scared about it. I hate the look of genitalia, even my own, so maybe that’s why? I had never used tampons for that reason (I still don’t, but it’s because I can’t be bothered with them). I think I was in my late teens when I fingered myself for the first time. It was rather liberating.
9. I have tried to make myself come by fingering myself but I ended up peeing, and it put me off completely so I haven’t tried it since. I have also tried clitoral stimulation with my fingers. I came close once, but I got too frustrated waiting to come so I just resorted back to my humping technique. It is obviously the best way to orgasm for me.
10. I never had a boyfriend (or first kiss) until I was 21. I felt inadequate for the longest time, wondering WHY nobody liked me ‘that way.’ I sometimes blamed it on the fact that I have small breasts, or my average looks. I’m actually glad I had to wait so long now, as it was worth it. And I don’t think I was mature enough for a boyfriend when I was a teenager.
11. My first and current boyfriend I met on the internet. We were from the same state and the same age, but were living in different towns. We talked for ages and ages online before we admitted we liked each other and wanted to meet in real life. He talked about wanting to do certain things with me, and it was the strangest feeling hearing that. I actually felt wanted; I had never felt that way before. I told him I had never done ‘anything’ before and he said he was willing to wait for me. (He was a virgin too, which was comforting, although he had done some other ‘stuff’ with previous girlfriends, all short-term relationships). Once we met in real life he moved to my city. It was 6 months into our relationship before we actually had sex. Yes, I made him wait that long... I’m not sure how he survived but it is a testament to him and our relationship that he loved me enough to wait.
12. Before we had sex we experimented in other ways together. I never thought I would be brave enough to do some of the things I have, especially because of my lack of experience. The first time we met I had never felt more comfortable in my entire life, it was strange but awesome. I thought I would be a lot more nervous and awkward.
13. From the outset I realised he was a very passionate and intense person and got turned on very quickly (he’s a true Scorpio!). Even when we first met, he had erections even while we were standing up and making out! It made me feel good that I could turn him on like that.
14. We became very good at dry-humping with our clothes on before we had sex. In fact we still do it as a precursor to intercourse. It’s a great way of turning us both on completely. I just love feeling his erection, and knowing that I’m making him feel good. I was a bit stunned at the time that I, Miss No Experience, could do that. But that’s one of my favorite things to do, turning him on, and making him come.
15. Eventually, I gained some confidence and moved on to hand jobs, and apparently I’m really good at that too. I never liked to look at his penis if I could help it... I think it all comes down to not liking the look of genitalia, as I said earlier. It’s probably a reason why I’ve never shaved my vagina, because I don’t want to see all the bits!
16.I’m not a huge fan of oral sex (on myself). It just feels weird to me and I am too nervous about it to properly enjoy it. My boyfriend knows this and hasn’t done it for a long time now. I have, however, given him blow jobs. I’m surprised I do because I swore on my life I would never give anyone a blow job (the thought of it was “really gross”) but lo and behold, things change as you get older! I don’t like doing it all the time, but every now and again I feel like doing it and he says I’m amazing at it, which is quite comforting. It’s not as bad as I thought it would be. I have never let him come in my mouth, though – that disgusts the crap out of me. He said he would like to come in my mouth but I’m not sure if I will ever let him. It kind of makes me feel guilty.
17. The first time we had sex it hurt like a bat out of hell because I was so tight and nervous! In fact it hurt so much that he never entered me completely and therefore never came himself, which I felt bad about but he said I shouldn’t feel bad. It was only after the third time that sex started to feel good for me.
18.I have never come during sexual intercourse but it doesn’t really bother me so much. I enjoy sex for the emotional intensity it brings and I absolutely LOVE it when he tells me he’s coming. Penetration DOES feel good for me even though I don’t come. We are also big on kissing during sex, which I love as well. I love kissing – and I’m making up for the fact I was never kissed for the first 21 years of my life!
19. We’re a bit of a vanilla couple and alternate between missionary and me-on-top positions, but I don’t mind too much. We have tried shower sex, against-the-wall sex and doggy style, all which I enjoyed but it was surprisingly hard to do. We’re basically still a young couple, and continuing to experiment. One thing we will never do is anal. My boyfriend doesn’t like the idea at all and I’m also turned off by it. One of my favorite things is morning sex. I just love how we don’t care how bad our breath is, we just want to make out and make each other feel good. I quite enjoy rough/hard sex, too.
20. His penis isn’t very long, but it’s quite thick, which suits me. I’m not fussed at how big he is. It still feels good to me when we have sex. He doesn’t care that my breasts are small, so likewise I don’t care that his penis is.
21. He has only made me come twice before – just by clitoral stimulation. I never thought I’d be able to come differently than to how I’m used to, but I did. It took a lot of rubbing of my clit but it finally paid off. Unfortunately this is a rare event, and sometimes I get frustrated and I think he gets frustrated when he teases my clit for ages and nothing seems to happen. I get very turned on but eventually I feel raw and tell him to stop. I envy those women who can come quite easily this way, when I can’t.
22. I have a fantasy about masturbating the way I do, and my boyfriend entering me from behind. I wonder when I will work up the courage to tell him that’s what I’d like to try! I’m still a tad shy about these things. But we have plenty of time to figure things out.
23. This leads me onto the fact that I’d be happy if my current boyfriend was the only man I was ever with for the rest of my life. I’m quite sentimental like that. We are both strong believers in monogamy. My Dad was my Mum’s first love and they’ve been together over 25 years now and I really admire them for that.
24. Randomly, I’d love to own a vibrator but I am far too embarrassed to order one, even from online.
25. Lastly, some of the best sex my boyfriend and I have had was in November last year. I didn’t see him for three weeks because we took a bit of a break from each other for certain reasons, but when we got back together the feeling was electric. We had sex about three times over that weekend (that’s enough for us!) but it was extremely satisfying. In fact some of our best sexual experiences have been after we haven’t seen each other for a week or two, and our want for each other is sky high.
2. I always seemed to have crushes on boys when I was growing up. Every year of school I had a crush on one boy or another. My first crush was on a boy in kindergarten, so I would have been 4, then! However I was very naive, and if one of them showed an interest in me I would shy away completely. When I was 12 I was playing a game with my best friend (a boy, also 12) and my younger sister and I had to hide in a cupboard with my best friend. He ended up kissing my ear and my neck, and at the time I freaked out majorly and didn’t like it at all!
3. I first started masturbating when I was 12/13. I started humping the head of a teddy bear (yes, you heard right!). It felt good but I was always incredibly guilty about it. Sex wasn’t talked about openly in our household and I was always a bit sickened by the way my parents talked about sex with their friends.
4. I was 13 when I had my first orgasm. My sister and I shared a bunk bed at the time and I was on the top bunk. I used the teddy bear pressed between the bed and my clit, and I remember it being the most amazing feeling. It felt too good. I was scared she heard me but to this day I’m not sure. She did catch me humping my bear once in one of the other rooms in the house, and she asked me if I ever came and I lied and said I didn’t. She said she sometimes did the same thing. This is the one and only time we’ve come close to talking about our experiences!
5. Since my first orgasm I’ve used the same technique to masturbate. Basically like pillow humping but instead of a pillow it’s a stuffed toy bear or occasionally a quilt. I especially like it when the nose of the teddy bear is pressed against my clit, and I’ll position the bear on the edge of a chair, or my bed, and I don’t need to move around much, just the pressure is enough to make me come. In fact, disappointingly this is almost the only way I can come, although I do come very quickly and it can be quite intense if I’m turned on enough.
6. The biggest turn-ons for me are reading smutty fanfiction or novels, and watching people in movies and TV having sex and moaning. A few years ago I got into watching Beautiful Agony. I find that site has turned me on more than anything else. I particularly enjoy watching the women come more than men. I’m not homosexual at all, but I think it’s because I’m a woman myself, so I can relate to them and know exactly what they’re feeling. I’m not a fan of porn otherwise. I prefer watching their faces on BA and fantasizing about how they’re masturbating rather than actually seeing how they are.
7. I also have a bit of a fascination with breasts. I don’t want to touch them or anything but I like looking at them. I’ve always compared my breasts with others since mine are quite small and I’ve always been jealous of women who can get cleavage, ‘cause I can’t!
8. It took me the longest time before I was brave enough to finger myself. Sounds crazy but I was always a bit scared about it. I hate the look of genitalia, even my own, so maybe that’s why? I had never used tampons for that reason (I still don’t, but it’s because I can’t be bothered with them). I think I was in my late teens when I fingered myself for the first time. It was rather liberating.
9. I have tried to make myself come by fingering myself but I ended up peeing, and it put me off completely so I haven’t tried it since. I have also tried clitoral stimulation with my fingers. I came close once, but I got too frustrated waiting to come so I just resorted back to my humping technique. It is obviously the best way to orgasm for me.
10. I never had a boyfriend (or first kiss) until I was 21. I felt inadequate for the longest time, wondering WHY nobody liked me ‘that way.’ I sometimes blamed it on the fact that I have small breasts, or my average looks. I’m actually glad I had to wait so long now, as it was worth it. And I don’t think I was mature enough for a boyfriend when I was a teenager.
11. My first and current boyfriend I met on the internet. We were from the same state and the same age, but were living in different towns. We talked for ages and ages online before we admitted we liked each other and wanted to meet in real life. He talked about wanting to do certain things with me, and it was the strangest feeling hearing that. I actually felt wanted; I had never felt that way before. I told him I had never done ‘anything’ before and he said he was willing to wait for me. (He was a virgin too, which was comforting, although he had done some other ‘stuff’ with previous girlfriends, all short-term relationships). Once we met in real life he moved to my city. It was 6 months into our relationship before we actually had sex. Yes, I made him wait that long... I’m not sure how he survived but it is a testament to him and our relationship that he loved me enough to wait.
12. Before we had sex we experimented in other ways together. I never thought I would be brave enough to do some of the things I have, especially because of my lack of experience. The first time we met I had never felt more comfortable in my entire life, it was strange but awesome. I thought I would be a lot more nervous and awkward.
13. From the outset I realised he was a very passionate and intense person and got turned on very quickly (he’s a true Scorpio!). Even when we first met, he had erections even while we were standing up and making out! It made me feel good that I could turn him on like that.
14. We became very good at dry-humping with our clothes on before we had sex. In fact we still do it as a precursor to intercourse. It’s a great way of turning us both on completely. I just love feeling his erection, and knowing that I’m making him feel good. I was a bit stunned at the time that I, Miss No Experience, could do that. But that’s one of my favorite things to do, turning him on, and making him come.
15. Eventually, I gained some confidence and moved on to hand jobs, and apparently I’m really good at that too. I never liked to look at his penis if I could help it... I think it all comes down to not liking the look of genitalia, as I said earlier. It’s probably a reason why I’ve never shaved my vagina, because I don’t want to see all the bits!
16.I’m not a huge fan of oral sex (on myself). It just feels weird to me and I am too nervous about it to properly enjoy it. My boyfriend knows this and hasn’t done it for a long time now. I have, however, given him blow jobs. I’m surprised I do because I swore on my life I would never give anyone a blow job (the thought of it was “really gross”) but lo and behold, things change as you get older! I don’t like doing it all the time, but every now and again I feel like doing it and he says I’m amazing at it, which is quite comforting. It’s not as bad as I thought it would be. I have never let him come in my mouth, though – that disgusts the crap out of me. He said he would like to come in my mouth but I’m not sure if I will ever let him. It kind of makes me feel guilty.
17. The first time we had sex it hurt like a bat out of hell because I was so tight and nervous! In fact it hurt so much that he never entered me completely and therefore never came himself, which I felt bad about but he said I shouldn’t feel bad. It was only after the third time that sex started to feel good for me.
18.I have never come during sexual intercourse but it doesn’t really bother me so much. I enjoy sex for the emotional intensity it brings and I absolutely LOVE it when he tells me he’s coming. Penetration DOES feel good for me even though I don’t come. We are also big on kissing during sex, which I love as well. I love kissing – and I’m making up for the fact I was never kissed for the first 21 years of my life!
19. We’re a bit of a vanilla couple and alternate between missionary and me-on-top positions, but I don’t mind too much. We have tried shower sex, against-the-wall sex and doggy style, all which I enjoyed but it was surprisingly hard to do. We’re basically still a young couple, and continuing to experiment. One thing we will never do is anal. My boyfriend doesn’t like the idea at all and I’m also turned off by it. One of my favorite things is morning sex. I just love how we don’t care how bad our breath is, we just want to make out and make each other feel good. I quite enjoy rough/hard sex, too.
20. His penis isn’t very long, but it’s quite thick, which suits me. I’m not fussed at how big he is. It still feels good to me when we have sex. He doesn’t care that my breasts are small, so likewise I don’t care that his penis is.
21. He has only made me come twice before – just by clitoral stimulation. I never thought I’d be able to come differently than to how I’m used to, but I did. It took a lot of rubbing of my clit but it finally paid off. Unfortunately this is a rare event, and sometimes I get frustrated and I think he gets frustrated when he teases my clit for ages and nothing seems to happen. I get very turned on but eventually I feel raw and tell him to stop. I envy those women who can come quite easily this way, when I can’t.
22. I have a fantasy about masturbating the way I do, and my boyfriend entering me from behind. I wonder when I will work up the courage to tell him that’s what I’d like to try! I’m still a tad shy about these things. But we have plenty of time to figure things out.
23. This leads me onto the fact that I’d be happy if my current boyfriend was the only man I was ever with for the rest of my life. I’m quite sentimental like that. We are both strong believers in monogamy. My Dad was my Mum’s first love and they’ve been together over 25 years now and I really admire them for that.
24. Randomly, I’d love to own a vibrator but I am far too embarrassed to order one, even from online.
25. Lastly, some of the best sex my boyfriend and I have had was in November last year. I didn’t see him for three weeks because we took a bit of a break from each other for certain reasons, but when we got back together the feeling was electric. We had sex about three times over that weekend (that’s enough for us!) but it was extremely satisfying. In fact some of our best sexual experiences have been after we haven’t seen each other for a week or two, and our want for each other is sky high.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Saturday, May 14, 2011
1. I'm an eighteen-year-old female and I don't identify with specific labels; I'm just "queer."
2. I might be a lesbian, though.
3. I've had sex with one boy once, and one girl multiple times. Sex with the girl was SO much better.
4. Since coming to college in August, I have made out with one boy and made out with/hooked up with countless girls. I was worried about this at the beginning, but now am not.
5. I love to masturbate. I stumbled upon porn by accident when I was 10 and have been fascinated by it ever since.
6. I like it rough. Having hickeys and bruises and scratches is really sexy, even though it takes a lot to make my skin bruise.
7. People who are silent during sex are incomprehensible to me. I like it when people make noise, especially when girls moan.
8. I like having sex in nontraditional places (in the English building of my college, for instance, or the dining hall, or the laundry room). I have fantasies about having sex in semi-public places. (One time, a girl and I were hooking up in a stairwell at a party and campus security barged in on us and it was incredible.)
9. I'm hopelessly in love with a girl who's three years older than me. We've hooked up twice and both times have been unbelievable. She identifies as queer but admits that she is more into men than women. She's also graduating in a few weeks, and I'm preparing to be heartbroken.
10.I love other women's breasts, but am still on the fence about my own (they're big).
11. If I could, I'd have rough sex every day, multiple times a day.
12. I have never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, not even in middle or high school.
13. A lot of my sexual experiences have happened while I was drunk.
14. I've masturbated and orgasmed while my roommate has been in the room.
15. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 16 (all of my friends had had theirs when they were around 13 or 14) and it was awful and gross and he was incredibly drunk.
16. One time, I was making out pretty heavily with a girl at a party. Some bro was watching us the entire time and I couldn't tell if I liked it or not.
17. I really want to have a threesome, probably with two girls (but am open to other arrangements).
18. The girl I'm in love with held my hands the entire time we hooked up and also gave me some of the most impressive hickeys I've ever seen. It was so intimate and sexy that I soaked through my underwear. Even thinking about it makes me goosebumpy.
19. I think the hottest character (besides Shane... obviously) from the L Word is Carmen. Alice might be my favorite, though, just because she's so damn funny.
20. I'm really femmey (I have long hair, am petite, wear feminine makeup and clothes [generally]) and probably read as 100% straight. I have a huge fantasy about going totally butch, though. I probably never will.
21. Piercings and tattoos are some of my biggest turn-ons. I have a nose ring and three ear piercings and a tattoo on the inside of my lip. I want more of both.
22. I am a feminist and maybe because of this, I do not like being dominated by men. With women, however, I'm much more open to being a bottom.
23. I love kissing. The girl I'm in love with (the amount of times I've mentioned her already is really pathetic) is an incredible kisser, alternatively forceful and tender. In the middle of one of our hookups, she ran her tongue from my collarbone to my ear and then nibbled on my earlobe and I got more aroused than I ever have been in my life.
24. I didn't fully "come out" as queer until this year, but I've always had some idea. I just assumed that the feelings I had for other girls were girlcrushes (whatever those are), but coming to a very liberal college made me realize that in fact, I really wanted to fuck them, not just be friends with them. (This seems to be a very common theme in queer girls.)
25. Sex is probably what I'm thinking about 99% of the time.
2. I might be a lesbian, though.
3. I've had sex with one boy once, and one girl multiple times. Sex with the girl was SO much better.
4. Since coming to college in August, I have made out with one boy and made out with/hooked up with countless girls. I was worried about this at the beginning, but now am not.
5. I love to masturbate. I stumbled upon porn by accident when I was 10 and have been fascinated by it ever since.
6. I like it rough. Having hickeys and bruises and scratches is really sexy, even though it takes a lot to make my skin bruise.
7. People who are silent during sex are incomprehensible to me. I like it when people make noise, especially when girls moan.
8. I like having sex in nontraditional places (in the English building of my college, for instance, or the dining hall, or the laundry room). I have fantasies about having sex in semi-public places. (One time, a girl and I were hooking up in a stairwell at a party and campus security barged in on us and it was incredible.)
9. I'm hopelessly in love with a girl who's three years older than me. We've hooked up twice and both times have been unbelievable. She identifies as queer but admits that she is more into men than women. She's also graduating in a few weeks, and I'm preparing to be heartbroken.
10.I love other women's breasts, but am still on the fence about my own (they're big).
11. If I could, I'd have rough sex every day, multiple times a day.
12. I have never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, not even in middle or high school.
13. A lot of my sexual experiences have happened while I was drunk.
14. I've masturbated and orgasmed while my roommate has been in the room.
15. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 16 (all of my friends had had theirs when they were around 13 or 14) and it was awful and gross and he was incredibly drunk.
16. One time, I was making out pretty heavily with a girl at a party. Some bro was watching us the entire time and I couldn't tell if I liked it or not.
17. I really want to have a threesome, probably with two girls (but am open to other arrangements).
18. The girl I'm in love with held my hands the entire time we hooked up and also gave me some of the most impressive hickeys I've ever seen. It was so intimate and sexy that I soaked through my underwear. Even thinking about it makes me goosebumpy.
19. I think the hottest character (besides Shane... obviously) from the L Word is Carmen. Alice might be my favorite, though, just because she's so damn funny.
20. I'm really femmey (I have long hair, am petite, wear feminine makeup and clothes [generally]) and probably read as 100% straight. I have a huge fantasy about going totally butch, though. I probably never will.
21. Piercings and tattoos are some of my biggest turn-ons. I have a nose ring and three ear piercings and a tattoo on the inside of my lip. I want more of both.
22. I am a feminist and maybe because of this, I do not like being dominated by men. With women, however, I'm much more open to being a bottom.
23. I love kissing. The girl I'm in love with (the amount of times I've mentioned her already is really pathetic) is an incredible kisser, alternatively forceful and tender. In the middle of one of our hookups, she ran her tongue from my collarbone to my ear and then nibbled on my earlobe and I got more aroused than I ever have been in my life.
24. I didn't fully "come out" as queer until this year, but I've always had some idea. I just assumed that the feelings I had for other girls were girlcrushes (whatever those are), but coming to a very liberal college made me realize that in fact, I really wanted to fuck them, not just be friends with them. (This seems to be a very common theme in queer girls.)
25. Sex is probably what I'm thinking about 99% of the time.
Friday, May 13, 2011
1. I'm a 41-year-old male, mostly heterosexual, but far from completely so.
2. I'm male, but I don't have a strong gender identity. I'm not a woman trapped in a man's body, it's just that I don't feel like I'm the same as the other males around me. Since I stopped worrying about the "identity" bit of "gender identity", I've been much happier.
3. I used to cross-dress socially. I wasn't attempting to convince people that I was a woman, I was just being me. I haven't done so for years.
4. I've never been in a serious long-term relationship. I'd like to, but it's never happened for me. I'm not sure why, I get positive feedback about who I am and how I look, it just seems like everyone thinks I'd be great for someone else, just not themselves...
5. This used to distress me a lot. Depression and loneliness feed off each other in a nasty downhill spiral. I'm not sure how I managed to avoid suicide at various times. I'm OK now.
6. The vast majority of my sex life is with women, and it's only with women that I look for emotional intimacy.
7. I had sexual encounters with men once a year or so up until my early thirties. Since then it's been rare, but I never regret it when I do.
8. For the last decade or so, the vast majority of my sex life has been paid sex with female prostitutes.
9. Mostly, I try to make friends with the women I pay for sex, and we both enjoy each other's company, and both enjoy the sex.
10. I'm fortunate to live in a country where prostitution is legal, the industry is clean, and the workers are usually strong independent women in control of their lives and sexuality.
11. Sex workers often orgasm with me. So far as I can tell, a sex worker orgasms with me just as often as many wives experience with their husbands, maybe more often. This is not faked. Sex workers know their own sexuality better than most people, and if we're both happy and relaxed, things work.
12. Because I've been paying for sex regularly for a decade or so, I've had sex with a stupidly large number of people. Some men might boast about that, but this is not a matter of pride for me. I'm not ashamed of it either, it's just a fact.
13. It is a matter of pride to me that several sex workers are genuine friends. I don't boast about it, it just feels good.
14. I'm no longer making particularly serious efforts to find a relationship outside of prostitution.
15. I have a good sex life. It would be nice to wake up with someone every day and share my life with them, though.
16. I don't orgasm every time I have sex. Mostly I do, sometimes I don't. Sometimes stress or alcohol get in the way. Or occasionally it just doesn't happen. Because I'm having sex in a situation with fairly clear expectations of what will happen, this can be pretty disconcerting. It doesn't worry me much any more; sometimes it does worry my partners.
17. My best experiences of sex-without-an-orgasm have been positive, fulfilling experiences. Once I got past the social expectation that a guy comes every time he fucks, it's fine. Not the best sex ever, not a disaster either.
18. Recently I've been masturbating much more than usual (at least since I was in my early 20s). Some people have the attitude that wanking is something you do because you're not getting laid. I experience the opposite. When my sex life is good, wanking is better too.
19. A few times I've fallen in love with sex workers.
20. The first couple of times, this was emotionally difficult for me, because I didn't believe a sex worker might like me. I suspect that there was more reciprocation than I realized at the time.
21. I've had sex workers get very fond of me. I'm not entirely sure how much they were in love with me, and how much they saw me as a friend separate from sex (I suspect different in different cases).
22. I've had unpaid flings with people I've met as sex workers, but it's never been practical for that to progress to a real relationship.
23. Currently, I'm getting very very fond of two prostitutes. I'm not making any effort to stop my emotions towards them. I like the receptionist at my local brothel a lot too, but not having had sex with her, I'm a bit more level-headed about her.
24. So far as I can tell, I can trust these three. They've made my life better, and I'm happier with myself than ever before in my life. I feel safe with letting my emotions go, even though I'm not quite sure what they think of me.
25. This is nice, but it can't stay like that forever. Soon, I'll have to talk to these people about my emotions (it probably won't be a surprise to them, but we need to talk about it). And then either take things further with one of them, or else pull my emotions back.
2. I'm male, but I don't have a strong gender identity. I'm not a woman trapped in a man's body, it's just that I don't feel like I'm the same as the other males around me. Since I stopped worrying about the "identity" bit of "gender identity", I've been much happier.
3. I used to cross-dress socially. I wasn't attempting to convince people that I was a woman, I was just being me. I haven't done so for years.
4. I've never been in a serious long-term relationship. I'd like to, but it's never happened for me. I'm not sure why, I get positive feedback about who I am and how I look, it just seems like everyone thinks I'd be great for someone else, just not themselves...
5. This used to distress me a lot. Depression and loneliness feed off each other in a nasty downhill spiral. I'm not sure how I managed to avoid suicide at various times. I'm OK now.
6. The vast majority of my sex life is with women, and it's only with women that I look for emotional intimacy.
7. I had sexual encounters with men once a year or so up until my early thirties. Since then it's been rare, but I never regret it when I do.
8. For the last decade or so, the vast majority of my sex life has been paid sex with female prostitutes.
9. Mostly, I try to make friends with the women I pay for sex, and we both enjoy each other's company, and both enjoy the sex.
10. I'm fortunate to live in a country where prostitution is legal, the industry is clean, and the workers are usually strong independent women in control of their lives and sexuality.
11. Sex workers often orgasm with me. So far as I can tell, a sex worker orgasms with me just as often as many wives experience with their husbands, maybe more often. This is not faked. Sex workers know their own sexuality better than most people, and if we're both happy and relaxed, things work.
12. Because I've been paying for sex regularly for a decade or so, I've had sex with a stupidly large number of people. Some men might boast about that, but this is not a matter of pride for me. I'm not ashamed of it either, it's just a fact.
13. It is a matter of pride to me that several sex workers are genuine friends. I don't boast about it, it just feels good.
14. I'm no longer making particularly serious efforts to find a relationship outside of prostitution.
15. I have a good sex life. It would be nice to wake up with someone every day and share my life with them, though.
16. I don't orgasm every time I have sex. Mostly I do, sometimes I don't. Sometimes stress or alcohol get in the way. Or occasionally it just doesn't happen. Because I'm having sex in a situation with fairly clear expectations of what will happen, this can be pretty disconcerting. It doesn't worry me much any more; sometimes it does worry my partners.
17. My best experiences of sex-without-an-orgasm have been positive, fulfilling experiences. Once I got past the social expectation that a guy comes every time he fucks, it's fine. Not the best sex ever, not a disaster either.
18. Recently I've been masturbating much more than usual (at least since I was in my early 20s). Some people have the attitude that wanking is something you do because you're not getting laid. I experience the opposite. When my sex life is good, wanking is better too.
19. A few times I've fallen in love with sex workers.
20. The first couple of times, this was emotionally difficult for me, because I didn't believe a sex worker might like me. I suspect that there was more reciprocation than I realized at the time.
21. I've had sex workers get very fond of me. I'm not entirely sure how much they were in love with me, and how much they saw me as a friend separate from sex (I suspect different in different cases).
22. I've had unpaid flings with people I've met as sex workers, but it's never been practical for that to progress to a real relationship.
23. Currently, I'm getting very very fond of two prostitutes. I'm not making any effort to stop my emotions towards them. I like the receptionist at my local brothel a lot too, but not having had sex with her, I'm a bit more level-headed about her.
24. So far as I can tell, I can trust these three. They've made my life better, and I'm happier with myself than ever before in my life. I feel safe with letting my emotions go, even though I'm not quite sure what they think of me.
25. This is nice, but it can't stay like that forever. Soon, I'll have to talk to these people about my emotions (it probably won't be a surprise to them, but we need to talk about it). And then either take things further with one of them, or else pull my emotions back.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
1. I'm a 22-year-old queer identified feminist cis-lady, strictly nonmonogamous and pro-love. When this is too much of a mouthful, I just say I'm bi.
2. Queer means (to me) that fucking and love has nothing to do with the gender, gender presentation, or sexuality of the other person. If I find myself sexually attracted to you, I don't question it, I just rock it. And I've been sexually attracted to people all across the spectrum, so I don't try to classify myself anymore.
3. I have slept with approximately 26 people, not including clients.
4. I've worked in several different mediums of sex work. I always found it to be silly, and more entertaining than waitressing. I don't think it's empowering necessarily, I just like cumming at work.
5. Kink has always defined my sexuality more than gender. Seriously, hetero, homo, bi… that just doesn't make sense. We should be divided into "kinky" and "not." That would make my life so much easier.
6. I'm in relationships with two men and maintain a romantic and sexual friendship with a woman. All of my relationships are open. I am deeply in love with all three of these people. One of the things I hate most about monogamy (among many many things) is the idea that you can only love one person at a time.
7. I love that I am a woman. I love my blood, my skin, my ass, my beautiful vulva, my long legs that look so fucking strong, my itty bitty titties, my janky toes, my weird sloping hips, my collarbones, my tattoos, my neck, my dreaded hair, my everything. It took a long time, but I'm finally starting to feel like my physical representation truly reflects ME, and it is beautiful.
8. I hate to say this, but I'm very used to sexual harassment. Years in the service industry left me pretty jaded. That's part of the reason I'm so fond of sex work, even though I'm not doing it any more--if you're going to objectify me anyway, I want a hell of a lot more than a two dollar tip.
9. I love gang bang porn. One of many aspects of my sexuality that I have a hard time justifying with my otherwise raging and radical feminist side.
10. I love being naked and usually at least partially am.
11. I think shaming woman's bodies and sexuality is a violence against women. Shame is one of the most gendered, horrible, and atrociously common aspects of being a woman-- I don't know a single woman who hasn't had to deal with it at one point or another. My life and sexuality are projects in the abolition of shame.
12. I've masturbated to the same set of fantasies since I was a teenager. I'm actually a very lazy masturbator, and I'm usually done in under a minute.
13. I learned how to masturbate with my Wiggle Writer pen when I was a kid.
14. I am an exhibitionist. I love sex in public places and group sex.
15. I'm a sub and a masochist. Sometimes I feel like this also makes me a "bad feminist." But fuck that.
16. I don't believe I ever want children, though I do get the hormonal baby cravings every once in awhile.
17. My current primary boyfriend has taught me more about my sexuality than most of my other partners combined. I have never met somebody so eager to explore every aspect of our sexual desire together. I am a lucky lucky lady to have him in my life and in my bed.
18. I regularly fake orgasms with partners. Partnered sex is not and has never been about orgasms to me. I actually can't tell a lot of the time if I am faking or not, because I do get pretty crazy when I "cum" but it's a much different orgasm than any I have by myself.
19. I recently got into pee-play with my partner. It surprised me how really fucking sexy and not at all gross it is.
20. I'm terribly shy around women I'm interested in and horrible at initiating sexual relationships with them. My relationships with women have always been the most profound and frustrating relationships in my life. I find men to be "easier."
21. Stoned sex is so fucking stellar. Sex on ecstasy is crazy and confusing as hell and amazing. Sex on acid is usually weird, but one time the stars aligned and I had a religious experience and I have never felt closer and more unified with a person before or since.
22. I am easily the most sexually "deviant" among my friends. Luckily, I was blessed with nonjudgmental and wonderful friends.
23. I'm not a sex fiend and I don't usually spend much time thinking about it if I'm not having it UNLESS I'm at work. Customer service jobs are only tolerable if you're fantasizing about double penetration.
24. I get very self conscious when I don't get wet, even when I'm turned on. I feel like using lube is admitting defeat. It's definitely a mental block that I need to get over.
25. I think cocks are amazing and beautiful. They're all so different, they all behave so differently. Watching and feeling a cock get hard turns me on immediately. I love to play with my partners' flaccid cocks, I love giving head. I am, admittedly, a size queen, though. I recently fucked my partner with a strap-on for the first time, and I found out I love having a cock too.
2. Queer means (to me) that fucking and love has nothing to do with the gender, gender presentation, or sexuality of the other person. If I find myself sexually attracted to you, I don't question it, I just rock it. And I've been sexually attracted to people all across the spectrum, so I don't try to classify myself anymore.
3. I have slept with approximately 26 people, not including clients.
4. I've worked in several different mediums of sex work. I always found it to be silly, and more entertaining than waitressing. I don't think it's empowering necessarily, I just like cumming at work.
5. Kink has always defined my sexuality more than gender. Seriously, hetero, homo, bi… that just doesn't make sense. We should be divided into "kinky" and "not." That would make my life so much easier.
6. I'm in relationships with two men and maintain a romantic and sexual friendship with a woman. All of my relationships are open. I am deeply in love with all three of these people. One of the things I hate most about monogamy (among many many things) is the idea that you can only love one person at a time.
7. I love that I am a woman. I love my blood, my skin, my ass, my beautiful vulva, my long legs that look so fucking strong, my itty bitty titties, my janky toes, my weird sloping hips, my collarbones, my tattoos, my neck, my dreaded hair, my everything. It took a long time, but I'm finally starting to feel like my physical representation truly reflects ME, and it is beautiful.
8. I hate to say this, but I'm very used to sexual harassment. Years in the service industry left me pretty jaded. That's part of the reason I'm so fond of sex work, even though I'm not doing it any more--if you're going to objectify me anyway, I want a hell of a lot more than a two dollar tip.
9. I love gang bang porn. One of many aspects of my sexuality that I have a hard time justifying with my otherwise raging and radical feminist side.
10. I love being naked and usually at least partially am.
11. I think shaming woman's bodies and sexuality is a violence against women. Shame is one of the most gendered, horrible, and atrociously common aspects of being a woman-- I don't know a single woman who hasn't had to deal with it at one point or another. My life and sexuality are projects in the abolition of shame.
12. I've masturbated to the same set of fantasies since I was a teenager. I'm actually a very lazy masturbator, and I'm usually done in under a minute.
13. I learned how to masturbate with my Wiggle Writer pen when I was a kid.
14. I am an exhibitionist. I love sex in public places and group sex.
15. I'm a sub and a masochist. Sometimes I feel like this also makes me a "bad feminist." But fuck that.
16. I don't believe I ever want children, though I do get the hormonal baby cravings every once in awhile.
17. My current primary boyfriend has taught me more about my sexuality than most of my other partners combined. I have never met somebody so eager to explore every aspect of our sexual desire together. I am a lucky lucky lady to have him in my life and in my bed.
18. I regularly fake orgasms with partners. Partnered sex is not and has never been about orgasms to me. I actually can't tell a lot of the time if I am faking or not, because I do get pretty crazy when I "cum" but it's a much different orgasm than any I have by myself.
19. I recently got into pee-play with my partner. It surprised me how really fucking sexy and not at all gross it is.
20. I'm terribly shy around women I'm interested in and horrible at initiating sexual relationships with them. My relationships with women have always been the most profound and frustrating relationships in my life. I find men to be "easier."
21. Stoned sex is so fucking stellar. Sex on ecstasy is crazy and confusing as hell and amazing. Sex on acid is usually weird, but one time the stars aligned and I had a religious experience and I have never felt closer and more unified with a person before or since.
22. I am easily the most sexually "deviant" among my friends. Luckily, I was blessed with nonjudgmental and wonderful friends.
23. I'm not a sex fiend and I don't usually spend much time thinking about it if I'm not having it UNLESS I'm at work. Customer service jobs are only tolerable if you're fantasizing about double penetration.
24. I get very self conscious when I don't get wet, even when I'm turned on. I feel like using lube is admitting defeat. It's definitely a mental block that I need to get over.
25. I think cocks are amazing and beautiful. They're all so different, they all behave so differently. Watching and feeling a cock get hard turns me on immediately. I love to play with my partners' flaccid cocks, I love giving head. I am, admittedly, a size queen, though. I recently fucked my partner with a strap-on for the first time, and I found out I love having a cock too.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
1. I'm 43 and female and did not realize I was bi until a few years ago.
2. I always had sexy dreams about a guy and a girl, and one day I woke up and thought "Oh! I'm the guy in these dreams!"
3. My marriage is sexually barren, which is depressing because I love my husband but his drive is very low and I am not attracted to him at all.
4. I had a lover who was intensely passionate and very kinky, which I miss a lot.
5. I try not to think about sex most of the time because I can get so frustrated, even with my stupid vibrating clit toy.
6. I have only been with two girls. Once in college, and once with an ex and his wife. That was really fun until I found out she did not like her clit touched due to surgery; then I lost interest in that encounter.
7. The only guy I ever crave is the old lover, and he's too far away.
8. I have been a cougar before, but only because I like to dominate. Always they were older than 18, and too innocent. Then I just regret it.
9. I think the lover really messed up my head, because he got more and more submissive and it turns me on so much.
10. I get rougher now. The more I'm turned on, I grab and pinch and bite, I want to hear him moan and whimper.
11. I used to feel fat and ugly, but that lover really showed me that I can be someone's sex fantasy, and be sexy, just let go and enjoy it.
12. I don't understand why I am attracted to the masculine lesbians, but they are hot!
13. I love watching two guys, or even thinking about it.
14. I have done a lot of research/experimenting with BDSM stuff. I don't know if I ever want anyone to top me, except a girl. That would be so sexy.
15. Watching or thinking about guys jerking off turns me on.
16. Armpits turn me on, and big hands.
17. I think I like watching people get turned on. The live club scene is fun for that. I miss it. Always wanted to take my guy there but he refused.
18. The best orgasm I ever had was making him finger me in a movie theater.
19. I finally had a guy twist my nipples and it felt so good!
20. I love to give blow jobs, anything oral. It's boring when they do it to me, I'd rather just fuck at that point.
21. I don't really like anal or doggie-style. I love the full-on bodies better.
22. When I was a teenager and we had no condoms, crazy us, we used sandwich baggies. We did not care! It's a wonder I did not get pregnant.
23. I am ashamed that I am only attracted to white people. I don't really understand, I am white, but so what?
24. I used to have my tongue pierced and it was way in the back and my lover would hold it and fuck me and I felt like it was my clit. It was very erotic.
25. I love to be so in control that I tell him to come and he just lets go and comes, as hard as I want him to.
2. I always had sexy dreams about a guy and a girl, and one day I woke up and thought "Oh! I'm the guy in these dreams!"
3. My marriage is sexually barren, which is depressing because I love my husband but his drive is very low and I am not attracted to him at all.
4. I had a lover who was intensely passionate and very kinky, which I miss a lot.
5. I try not to think about sex most of the time because I can get so frustrated, even with my stupid vibrating clit toy.
6. I have only been with two girls. Once in college, and once with an ex and his wife. That was really fun until I found out she did not like her clit touched due to surgery; then I lost interest in that encounter.
7. The only guy I ever crave is the old lover, and he's too far away.
8. I have been a cougar before, but only because I like to dominate. Always they were older than 18, and too innocent. Then I just regret it.
9. I think the lover really messed up my head, because he got more and more submissive and it turns me on so much.
10. I get rougher now. The more I'm turned on, I grab and pinch and bite, I want to hear him moan and whimper.
11. I used to feel fat and ugly, but that lover really showed me that I can be someone's sex fantasy, and be sexy, just let go and enjoy it.
12. I don't understand why I am attracted to the masculine lesbians, but they are hot!
13. I love watching two guys, or even thinking about it.
14. I have done a lot of research/experimenting with BDSM stuff. I don't know if I ever want anyone to top me, except a girl. That would be so sexy.
15. Watching or thinking about guys jerking off turns me on.
16. Armpits turn me on, and big hands.
17. I think I like watching people get turned on. The live club scene is fun for that. I miss it. Always wanted to take my guy there but he refused.
18. The best orgasm I ever had was making him finger me in a movie theater.
19. I finally had a guy twist my nipples and it felt so good!
20. I love to give blow jobs, anything oral. It's boring when they do it to me, I'd rather just fuck at that point.
21. I don't really like anal or doggie-style. I love the full-on bodies better.
22. When I was a teenager and we had no condoms, crazy us, we used sandwich baggies. We did not care! It's a wonder I did not get pregnant.
23. I am ashamed that I am only attracted to white people. I don't really understand, I am white, but so what?
24. I used to have my tongue pierced and it was way in the back and my lover would hold it and fuck me and I felt like it was my clit. It was very erotic.
25. I love to be so in control that I tell him to come and he just lets go and comes, as hard as I want him to.
Monday, May 9, 2011
1) I am a 20 year old 'woman' with serious thoughts about experimenting more with my gender.
2) That said, I'm terrified about my parents finding out that the 'little girl' they raised is becoming more and more comfortable with being called a boy.
3) But honestly, I don't think I'd ever want to transition. I enjoy being a 'girl' as much as I enjoy being a 'boy.'
4) The first time I ever felt truly at ease with my sexuality was last year when myself and my girlfriend made out on the couch of my friend's apartment.
5) I've had one 'actual' sexual partner. And he essentially put me off all normative sex for the remainder of my life.
6) I self-identify as 'queer,' 'cause in all honesty, I am odd for who I like and what I like.
7) I love blood, gore, amputation/amputees, androgyny, heavy BDSM, multiples (orgies, threesomes, etc) and toys in my porn.
8) I'm also starting to grow more and more fond of fluffier porn. Lots of hugs and kisses, but no actual sex.
9) I am currently dating a closet case.
10) I'm also terrified of outing her to her family, even if I get the suspicion that her Mum knows.
11) I cross dress. A lot.
12) The first time it crossed my mind that I might actually be a lesbian was playing truth or dare at age 12-ish.
13) I have participated in an all-female threesome before... with one of the women identifying as straight.
14) It was awkward, odd, and the first time I ever had an orgasm.
15) In an almost contradictory sense, I enjoy male/male slash and a bit of het. But you can't get me anywhere near mass-market and/or fanfiction female/female stuff. It always leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
16) I have only ever had one person go down on me before.
17) And I wish that it had happened sooner, because gorram did it feel wonderful.
18) I like giving oral. There's something wonderfully close about the act.
19) The people I date have to 'smell' right. Don't know why, but the scent of second hand smoke, dog, and something uniquely them, is the world's greatest combo.
20) I wish that there wasn't all these evil little labels which we have to use, 'cause it makes life awkward when you have to explain what you mean when you state that you are a 'vaguely genderqueer queer with a preference for women.'
21) I have never had another person help me indulge in one of my biggest kinks.
22) That said, I've often cut before masturbating, because of the high it lends to the act.
23) I'm of two minds about my kinks and sexuality. Most of the time I feel fine about it and it's perfectly okay... but on rare days, I wonder how the hell I could have fucked up so severely that I'm turned on by getting hurt and watching others get hurt.
24) I think I'm a switch, but I really don't know.
25) I haven't had sex in a while, and I'm not really certain I miss it.
2) That said, I'm terrified about my parents finding out that the 'little girl' they raised is becoming more and more comfortable with being called a boy.
3) But honestly, I don't think I'd ever want to transition. I enjoy being a 'girl' as much as I enjoy being a 'boy.'
4) The first time I ever felt truly at ease with my sexuality was last year when myself and my girlfriend made out on the couch of my friend's apartment.
5) I've had one 'actual' sexual partner. And he essentially put me off all normative sex for the remainder of my life.
6) I self-identify as 'queer,' 'cause in all honesty, I am odd for who I like and what I like.
7) I love blood, gore, amputation/amputees, androgyny, heavy BDSM, multiples (orgies, threesomes, etc) and toys in my porn.
8) I'm also starting to grow more and more fond of fluffier porn. Lots of hugs and kisses, but no actual sex.
9) I am currently dating a closet case.
10) I'm also terrified of outing her to her family, even if I get the suspicion that her Mum knows.
11) I cross dress. A lot.
12) The first time it crossed my mind that I might actually be a lesbian was playing truth or dare at age 12-ish.
13) I have participated in an all-female threesome before... with one of the women identifying as straight.
14) It was awkward, odd, and the first time I ever had an orgasm.
15) In an almost contradictory sense, I enjoy male/male slash and a bit of het. But you can't get me anywhere near mass-market and/or fanfiction female/female stuff. It always leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
16) I have only ever had one person go down on me before.
17) And I wish that it had happened sooner, because gorram did it feel wonderful.
18) I like giving oral. There's something wonderfully close about the act.
19) The people I date have to 'smell' right. Don't know why, but the scent of second hand smoke, dog, and something uniquely them, is the world's greatest combo.
20) I wish that there wasn't all these evil little labels which we have to use, 'cause it makes life awkward when you have to explain what you mean when you state that you are a 'vaguely genderqueer queer with a preference for women.'
21) I have never had another person help me indulge in one of my biggest kinks.
22) That said, I've often cut before masturbating, because of the high it lends to the act.
23) I'm of two minds about my kinks and sexuality. Most of the time I feel fine about it and it's perfectly okay... but on rare days, I wonder how the hell I could have fucked up so severely that I'm turned on by getting hurt and watching others get hurt.
24) I think I'm a switch, but I really don't know.
25) I haven't had sex in a while, and I'm not really certain I miss it.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
1. I’m a 26-year-old straight female.
2. I started masturbating at a very young age, probably around four or five.
3. I only started using sex toys within the past couple of years. I use both vibrators and dildos, but I prefer vibrators.
4. I can currently only orgasm through clitoral stimulation (hence my preference for vibrators).
5. I ejaculate pretty much every time I masturbate. I started ejaculating when I hit puberty, but I didn’t know exactly what was happening until my mid-late teens.
6. About a year ago, I had my first experience with multiple orgasms.
7. I’m easily aroused. Porn, erotic literature, sex scenes in either movies or TV shows, the sound of couples having sex – all of it gets me going.
8. Even though it turns me on, I really hate porn. Despite its ability to make me horny, I find most of it to be either crude or tacky. I prefer to read erotic stories or novels.
9. Despite the fact that I’m straight and really have no desire to have sex with a woman, the thought or sight of two women having sex or even just kissing excites me a great deal.
10. I don’t do anything to my pubic hair. I like my pubic hair. Furthermore, I don’t understand why women have to be hairless in order to be considered sexy these days.
11. I’ve only ever had one boyfriend... and I use the term “boyfriend” loosely because we were twelve.
12. This “boyfriend” sexually assaulted me, while holding a huge kitchen knife to my throat. I only recently told my family what happened because I was ashamed of myself. I thought I deserved it or had it coming because I let him touch me sexually before he actually assaulted me. I never let him go below the belt and there was never any oral sex or penetration of any kind. But, looking back on it, what we did was far too inappropriate for that age.
13. I’m still a virgin.
14. Because of what happened to me, I can only ever see myself having sex for the first time within the context of a long-term, loving, monogamous relationship. I need to know that the guy cares about me. Otherwise, I won’t be able to open up.
15. To be honest, sex kind of scares me. I want to do it – sometimes so badly I can hardly see straight – but I’m worried about the pain that potentially accompanies sex; both physical and emotional pain. I’m also terrified about getting an STD. Most of my friends have had at least one.
16. Even though I want to experience intercourse, I’m more excited by the prospect of oral sex. Specifically receiving it. I really, really want a guy to go down on me. However, I’m not as excited by the idea of giving a guy a blowjob. I’d do it, but I’m not certain it’s something I’d like.
17. I still have a fully intact hymen. This has made experimenting with penetration a pain in the ass.
18. I’ve only really kissed one person – the “boyfriend” from when I was twelve. He’s also the only person who’s ever touched me in a sexual manner.
19. I’m a bitter romantic. I believe that love exists, but I don’t think it will ever happen to me. Which is sad, because I want to be in love. Knowing that this probably isn’t in the cards for me is painful and I’ve become very negative about both love and relationships.
20. I’m an unattractive person; at least, this is what I’ve been told by pretty much every male I’ve encountered in life. I hate looking at myself naked, so much so that I only masturbate in the dark. I can’t see my body in the dark.
21. The thought of anybody else seeing me naked gives me nightmares. I don’t believe a guy could ever look at me and see something worth wanting sexually.
22. The times I’ve actually worked up the courage to flirt with guys, they’ve either walked away without saying anything or laughed in my face. I’m not kidding.
23. I’ve spent more than a decade in therapy trying to overcome both my issues with sex and my low self-esteem. I’m still clearly fucked up.
24. I’m certain that I’ll probably die a virgin. Between the sexual assault, my desire for romantic relationships only, my personal fears about sex, and the fact that I’m not considered attractive by most guys with whom I come into contact, I’ve pretty much given up hope.
25. As a result of my having given up on ever having sex or being in a relationship, I spend a lot of time daydreaming about both. I probably spend most of my day lost in some alternate universe my mind has created. In this universe, I was never sexually traumatized; I’m beautiful, desirable, wanted. I’m not hung up about anything sexually. I’m able to be in loving relationships with sweet men who actually give a shit about me. It’s kind of pathetic, actually…
2. I started masturbating at a very young age, probably around four or five.
3. I only started using sex toys within the past couple of years. I use both vibrators and dildos, but I prefer vibrators.
4. I can currently only orgasm through clitoral stimulation (hence my preference for vibrators).
5. I ejaculate pretty much every time I masturbate. I started ejaculating when I hit puberty, but I didn’t know exactly what was happening until my mid-late teens.
6. About a year ago, I had my first experience with multiple orgasms.
7. I’m easily aroused. Porn, erotic literature, sex scenes in either movies or TV shows, the sound of couples having sex – all of it gets me going.
8. Even though it turns me on, I really hate porn. Despite its ability to make me horny, I find most of it to be either crude or tacky. I prefer to read erotic stories or novels.
9. Despite the fact that I’m straight and really have no desire to have sex with a woman, the thought or sight of two women having sex or even just kissing excites me a great deal.
10. I don’t do anything to my pubic hair. I like my pubic hair. Furthermore, I don’t understand why women have to be hairless in order to be considered sexy these days.
11. I’ve only ever had one boyfriend... and I use the term “boyfriend” loosely because we were twelve.
12. This “boyfriend” sexually assaulted me, while holding a huge kitchen knife to my throat. I only recently told my family what happened because I was ashamed of myself. I thought I deserved it or had it coming because I let him touch me sexually before he actually assaulted me. I never let him go below the belt and there was never any oral sex or penetration of any kind. But, looking back on it, what we did was far too inappropriate for that age.
13. I’m still a virgin.
14. Because of what happened to me, I can only ever see myself having sex for the first time within the context of a long-term, loving, monogamous relationship. I need to know that the guy cares about me. Otherwise, I won’t be able to open up.
15. To be honest, sex kind of scares me. I want to do it – sometimes so badly I can hardly see straight – but I’m worried about the pain that potentially accompanies sex; both physical and emotional pain. I’m also terrified about getting an STD. Most of my friends have had at least one.
16. Even though I want to experience intercourse, I’m more excited by the prospect of oral sex. Specifically receiving it. I really, really want a guy to go down on me. However, I’m not as excited by the idea of giving a guy a blowjob. I’d do it, but I’m not certain it’s something I’d like.
17. I still have a fully intact hymen. This has made experimenting with penetration a pain in the ass.
18. I’ve only really kissed one person – the “boyfriend” from when I was twelve. He’s also the only person who’s ever touched me in a sexual manner.
19. I’m a bitter romantic. I believe that love exists, but I don’t think it will ever happen to me. Which is sad, because I want to be in love. Knowing that this probably isn’t in the cards for me is painful and I’ve become very negative about both love and relationships.
20. I’m an unattractive person; at least, this is what I’ve been told by pretty much every male I’ve encountered in life. I hate looking at myself naked, so much so that I only masturbate in the dark. I can’t see my body in the dark.
21. The thought of anybody else seeing me naked gives me nightmares. I don’t believe a guy could ever look at me and see something worth wanting sexually.
22. The times I’ve actually worked up the courage to flirt with guys, they’ve either walked away without saying anything or laughed in my face. I’m not kidding.
23. I’ve spent more than a decade in therapy trying to overcome both my issues with sex and my low self-esteem. I’m still clearly fucked up.
24. I’m certain that I’ll probably die a virgin. Between the sexual assault, my desire for romantic relationships only, my personal fears about sex, and the fact that I’m not considered attractive by most guys with whom I come into contact, I’ve pretty much given up hope.
25. As a result of my having given up on ever having sex or being in a relationship, I spend a lot of time daydreaming about both. I probably spend most of my day lost in some alternate universe my mind has created. In this universe, I was never sexually traumatized; I’m beautiful, desirable, wanted. I’m not hung up about anything sexually. I’m able to be in loving relationships with sweet men who actually give a shit about me. It’s kind of pathetic, actually…
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