1. I lost my virginity to a guy I only knew the first name of, in a tent at a rock festival when I was 17. It sounds so stupid and clichéd, but still to this day, I don't think it was a bad way of doing it. I was very ready for it, and since I never thought it had to be special, it was the right way to go. I still smile when I think about it, and I still have a photo of him saved (somewhere....). I remember that it was hard to know how to move and that he smelled a bit like earth.
2. I've always been very sexual. I masturbated for the first time at the age of five, and I can't even remember my first orgasm, since it is such a normal way of my body to behave. Sex is a interest of mine, and a language that I speak pretty well.
3. I look upon sex as almost a hobby. I read about it, I occasionally work with it (in my job as an artist), I think about it a lot, and sometimes I even get the opportunity to do it! We all have different interests; sex is one of mine. I don't think that that would make me more sexually active then anyone else, only that it interests me as a pheromone and a activity.
4. I'm queer. I don't like to label myself, but I have the ability to fall in love with any gender.
5. I "came out", or rather discovered my "queerness" quite late, at the age of 23. The girl I fell head over heels for had curly hair and a quirky smile. I actually didn't find her very attractive, but I loved her so deeply that I didn't care. In a way, that's not so strange, since...
6. ...I always had a problem with the whole love + sex situation. I don't get the "love-sex." I honestly don't think they're very connected. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's not. This could happen with anyone, regardless of your emotions. I can be in love without the sexual attraction, as well as I can have sexual attraction without being in love. But deep down, I would really like to get it. See what all the fuss is about. Maybe I just haven't been really in love?
7. I had sex with 37 men and one woman. I keep a list--because I forget easily and really don't want any of their names or faces to disappear. They all are a part of me. I was in love with maybe five of them. I'm 25 years old, and I don't know if this is very many for my age. I don't really care, though. I don't regret any of them.
8. I'm curious about everything in life, and that comes to sex too. If someone asks me to try out something I've never done before, I will say yes. This has put me in a lot of strange situations, like shoe-fetish sex, fucking a man with a strap-on, screaming to make sure the neighbors hear it, etc. Sometimes I like things and keep them in my sex life, most of the times I just consider it as a fun experiment.
9. The last thing on the list above wasn't at all hard to do since I'm always struggling with keeping my mouth shut in bed. I'm really loud!
10. I don't think there such a thing as "good in bed." To be good in bed, you need to be horny in bed, that's the goddamn key!
11. I get super annoyed by people who get grossed out during sex. It's not fresh. It's kind of stinky, sweaty and sticky. You will get fluids you don't know where they come from, both in your mouth, your hair and on your body. It's sex. Deal with it, try to relax and have fun, or don't do it at all.
12. I like giving head. I've always been oral, biting my nails, pencils, etc. When I found a new way of using my mouth, I instantly liked it. One of the reasons is because I'm good at it, and it arouses me seeing I can cause so much pleasure with only my mouth.
13. But in general, I think that people often forget to integrate the whole body when they have sex. It's so much about hands-mouth-gender. I try to think about how it feels in my entire body, not only the parts given attention for the moment, and when I succeed, the orgasm becomes so much more intense.
14. Since I'm very open-minded about sex, and people know that, I made certain rules for myself: I don't sleep with co-workers, I don't sleep with my friends' ex-boy/girlfriends, I don't sleep with friends. A few times, I broke the rules, and it always ended up in big drama--not so much from my side, though. I realize people put more emotions into sex than I do, and try to keep the non-emotion-sex to people I date, people I meet for only one night, or friends with benefits.
15. I think that friends with benefits is a great concept, but to be honest, after a while you get used to a body. How it moves, how it smells and how it comes. That might be confused with love, and that's where the problems usually start.
16. I had an abortion, at age 22. I didn't know the father very well, we only had the same friends. I had to call a friend to get his number, and when I called him he only said "I knew it". And I did too. I remember us looking at each other, with fear, and him saying "fuck. I think I got you pregnant now," and me nodding my head. I have so much faith that having the abortion was the right thing to do, both for myself and him. Today, three years later, I'm almost done with my BA in the school I was applying for when it happened, and his band is getting a record deal. This is a life I wouldn't be able to live with a baby, and I love my life.
17. Even though the abortion was one of the most painful experiences I had, I still don't protect myself all the time. I know that it's stupid, but I hate condoms. They always give me yeast infections that last for weeks, and whatever anyone says, it's just not the same thing. I only have sex without a condom with people I trust and have been recently tested, though, and I take birth-control pills when I have any kind of relationship.
18. One of my fantasies is waking up with someone that I don't know who it is inside of me. It's almost a rape fantasy, but more vanilla. I really like the thought of waking up and just not knowing, but still being so turned on that I want to continue.
19. I was a mistress for a while, to a 15 year older guy. He bought me sex toys and porn magazines, not jewelry and travel. He was one of those that could just give me a quick look to get me wet enough to go at it. I loved the sex we had; really hard and pure, with no strings at all. Eventually, I broke it off, since I was moving away.
20. The best sex I ever had was with a one-night stand. Something made me completely relaxed with this man, and there was just no limits. His cock was perfect, his body was perfect, and the sex was perfect. I can't remember anything we talked about, and I think that's a good thing, because if the conversations were perfect too, I'd have to fall madly in love with him.
21. Even though I'm very sexually open minded, I respect relationships. I've never cheated on any of my partners when the relationship isn't of an open sort. Not because I didn't want to, but because I respect that people want to be monogamous. The time I slept with a man who had a relationship, I didn't know at first and became very uncomfortable when I found out. I do think that a open relationship is possible, but that people are just too scared of trying it.
22. But then again, as the paradox I am when it comes to sex and love, I'm still waiting for the day I meet the person who shows me why people don't want to cheat.
23. Being a curious girl; this summer I'm trying something completely new. No sex. Not any sex with anyone. I draw the line at kissing and feeling up someone. After eight years of being sexually active, I haven't gone more than two months without sex. It's so easy to have it, it's so easy to get it, that I sort of lost the point with it. It's like money: when you have enough of it, it's just no fun anymore. So now, I decided to wait for three months, and then maybe wait a bit longer. Maybe even until I fall in love?
24. I love kissing. I LOVE kissing. Only kissing can make me more wet then someone going down on me. I French-kissed the first time in kindergarten, even though I don't think I was aware of what I was doing. I never decide if I want to sleep with someone before I've kissed them--a kiss tells so much about how they are in bed. And if the kiss is bad, I wouldn't want to waste more time.
25. The strangest place I ever had sex was on a cannon. Literally, ON a cannon. It wasn't very big, so after a while we switched over to the grass right below it. Having sex in public places is something that happens now and then. I really do like the risk of being seen.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
1. I'm bisexual, and I sincerely believe most of us are some degree of bisexual. I'm in a committed relationship with a guy. I honestly can't see myself in a committed relationship with a girl, but I'm very aroused by girls and the thoughts of sex with them.
2. I've never had sex with a girl. The closest I ever got was a blowjob from a close friend of mine. Sometimes I really feel like I've missed something special.
3. I've had some form of sexual experience with 25 different people. Although some of those short relationships ended unpleasantly, and one was an anonymous hookup that I shouldn't have done, I don't regret any of them. If anything, I regret the ones I passed up or missed out on. If I'd known what I was doing, that 25 would easily be 50 or 100 instead.
4. My very first sexual experience happened when I was 13, with my 15 year old friend. We gave each other blow jobs late one winter night when he was staying the night at my house. My parents were asleep in the next room and I was scared as hell, but after it was done I wanted it worse than ever.
5. My boyfriend and I have been involved in three ways twice, and a four way twice. As much fun as those were, and as much as I'd wanted to do that, I find that I prefer one on one.
6. I'm generally attracted to guys who are younger than me, the cute thin twink types. I think its partially because I long to have some of my teenage years back, to do some of it over and have fun without the confusion, anger, loneliness, and all the other crap I felt at that age. Maybe the idea of being with them lets me relive it vicariously through them.
7. The compliment to that is my fantasies about older guys. I'm usually not attracted to older guys, except in one certain way: the idea of being a cute young boy toy for an older guy. That really turns me on. Again, its a way for me to feel that I'm the young guy again, getting to have fun for the first time. Knowing what I have and how to use it and not feel sad, confused, lonely.
8. I've been attracted to other boys from an early age, long before I knew what gay or bisexual was. Before I even knew what sex was or what I was feeling. My first crush was on a friend in the first grade, when I was 6 years old. I thought he was the coolest, cutest boy in the world and I wanted to be with him all the time.
9. I've always loved to see other boys shirtless, and to this day a nice chest is one of the best things a guy can have in my opinion. I absolutely love nipples, both guys' and girls'.
10. Despite my first experiences at age 13, there was a very long dry spell throughout my teenage years. I was confused, lonely, depressed and withdrawn. By age 21 I was finally figuring myself out, discovering who I was in many aspects. I began coming out to friends and met my first boyfriend. He was 16 but more experienced than I was. The sex we had (lots of oral, no intercourse) was great. It didn't last long. He dumped me gently. The pain lingered for a long time, even after I moved on to others.
11. I think friends with benefits can be great, and I've had a few. But they can get awkward too, when one person develops deeper feelings and you have to let them down. I'm not the kind to believe that sex has to include love in order to be fun. Sex with someone you love deeply is the best, true lovemaking, but sex just for the sake of sex is very fun in itself.
12. I think I was 23 when I officially lost my virginity and had intercourse for the first time. I was really into the guy, he was 21. We agreed to take things slow, but I really didn't want that, I wanted sex. One night he gave me a blow job, and then decided that he did want to have sex. It was a great first time for me. I fucked him for what seemed like hours and came three times that night. In our passion neither one of us thought about using a condom. For some time after that I was afraid of what I may have caught. Fortunately for me, I didn't catch anything. I learned my lesson, and was always safe after that.
13. Not long after that I got fucked by a guy for the first time. It was a guy I had dated for a while, then we decided to just be friends with benefits. It was a good first time, I'm glad it was with him. But after that I was ready for some outright slutty fucking.
14. I began getting the slutty fucking soon after with a couple other friends with benefits. I discovered how much I love the slutty naughty feeling of being fucked doggy style over the back of a couch or on a futon. And how much I like getting my ass eaten while I suck cock on a 69. It was a bit of a slutty phase when I decided to give up on trying to find a LTR and just screw for the fun of it.
15. Honestly I much prefer being a top doing the fucking than being the one getting fucked. Under the right circumstances, with the right guy (usually an older guy) I like to get fucked. I fantasize about a handsome older guy who is slightly dominant but not in a humiliating or aggressive way. He's powerful but cares about me and my pleasure. He has a very attractive body and a big cock and I give myself up completely to his forceful but attentive fucking. I've never had that for real, only a few pale imitations. But usually I like being the older guy fucking the younger hottie.
15. I find my sexuality to be extremely liberating. It is such a part of who I am and how I see the world. I wouldn't be who I am today if I hadn't taken the journey of sexual discovery that I have. Bisexuality is no mystery or confusion to me, its simply a freer, less restrained form of sexuality. I don't limit myself to the arbitrary rules society makes about the roles we're supposed to play. What I don't understand is the straight people who are supposedly so disgusted by the thought of gay sex, or gay guys who are so disgusted by the thought of a vagina. Its all natural to me and great in its own way. The only unnatural thing to me is the revulsion we're taught by own society/culture.
16. There was a time when I was confused by it. I knew from the start of puberty that I was attracted to other boys but all I knew of gay people were negative stereotypes. I would think, 'I can't be gay, cause I'm not like that.' One day in my mid teens I was struggling with this inner conflict, I was crying from the thought that I was doomed to become those stereotypes. And then, like a light bulb, the realization came to me that I am who I am, and having sex with guys wasn't going to change that. I wasn't sure how it was all going to work, and the idea of "coming out" wasn't even on the radar for me, but that was the start of coming to terms with my sexuality. A wider world began to open.
17. I think I have something of an oral fixation. I'm not the kind of person to chew on pencils or stick my fingers in my mouth all day long, but the most arousing sex acts for me involve my mouth. Of course I love kissing. I love to give oral sex. I love to suck on a guy or girls nipples. There is something very arousing and very comforting about using my mouth in those ways.
18. Call me a size queen, but I think large cocks are very sexy. That doesn't mean I think they're necessary. I've had sex with several guys who were on the small side but it was never an issue. Better to have a guy who knows how to use his small one than a guy who doesn't know how to use his large one. But seeing big ones is a real turn on for me, and its very hot being able to play with a big one.
19. With girls however, I prefer small to medium breasts. Huge and/or fake boobs do nothing for me. I like them natural and proportional. Like the joke, 'anything more than a handful is a waste.' I don't know if it's true that many girls worry about the size of their breasts, but they certainly shouldn't.
20. Masturbation is great. I've been doing it since I was 11 years old and still do it almost every day. It's crazy to me that some people think masturbation is wrong. Its the most natural form of pure pleasure you can have with your body. First learning that I could pleasure myself, my first orgasm, my first ejaculation...each one was such a joyful discovery for me. Nobody should feel ashamed of those things.
21. Sex without love can be great, but when it comes to love fidelity is very important for me. I've been cheated on and it hurt terribly. It made me feel unnattractive and undesirable, and it also shook my trust in other people. Was hard to get through. I've never cheated while in a relationship, and have never tried to hook up with somebody else who is in a relationship.
22. Being that I am bisexual and so accepting of sex in so many ways, it may sound surprising when I say I'm quite vanilla. Besides having sex with guys and girls, or multiples of them, I'm not into kinky stuff. No scat or watersports, no pain or S&M. Not really into toys either (altho sometimes they serve a useful purpose.) Not into leather or slings or any of that stuff. Just naked people in a bed giving and recieving the pleasure of their bodies.
23. I notice that I have moods when I'm sometimes more into guys and sometimes more into girls. At times I'm really turned on by girls in porn and then other days I'm way more turned on by boys. Of course I'll take either given the opportunity. I'd never turn down a guy cause I was in a girl mood or vice versa.
24. I love porn, at least the certain kinds of porn I prefer. There is plenty of bad, cheesy, unattractive porn out there. I prefer pics on the net instead of movies, and not the mainstream porn with make-up and long fingernails and fishnet stocking, *ugh*. I like some of the amatuer pics, the tender ones, sometimes the artistic ones...and sometimes just really slutty ones. But I always want new and different porn. Always looking, searching, exploring.
25. Is sexuality genetic or is it a result of our upbringing? I have to say, 'does it matter?' I'm sexually aroused by both guys and girls. I like to suck cocks and girls' nipples. Does it matter if I have a certain genetic combination, or if I simply choose to enjoy those things? Human sexuality is a wonderful thing, more so because of the variety of forms it takes. Shouldn't we learn to discover and accept that variety for its own sake? Our scientific knowledge and abilities mean nothing until we can mature as a society that accepts and appreciates all its diverse forms and expressions. Can you imagine how much better the world would be if nobody was made to feel ashamed for exploring or expressing their sexuality?
2. I've never had sex with a girl. The closest I ever got was a blowjob from a close friend of mine. Sometimes I really feel like I've missed something special.
3. I've had some form of sexual experience with 25 different people. Although some of those short relationships ended unpleasantly, and one was an anonymous hookup that I shouldn't have done, I don't regret any of them. If anything, I regret the ones I passed up or missed out on. If I'd known what I was doing, that 25 would easily be 50 or 100 instead.
4. My very first sexual experience happened when I was 13, with my 15 year old friend. We gave each other blow jobs late one winter night when he was staying the night at my house. My parents were asleep in the next room and I was scared as hell, but after it was done I wanted it worse than ever.
5. My boyfriend and I have been involved in three ways twice, and a four way twice. As much fun as those were, and as much as I'd wanted to do that, I find that I prefer one on one.
6. I'm generally attracted to guys who are younger than me, the cute thin twink types. I think its partially because I long to have some of my teenage years back, to do some of it over and have fun without the confusion, anger, loneliness, and all the other crap I felt at that age. Maybe the idea of being with them lets me relive it vicariously through them.
7. The compliment to that is my fantasies about older guys. I'm usually not attracted to older guys, except in one certain way: the idea of being a cute young boy toy for an older guy. That really turns me on. Again, its a way for me to feel that I'm the young guy again, getting to have fun for the first time. Knowing what I have and how to use it and not feel sad, confused, lonely.
8. I've been attracted to other boys from an early age, long before I knew what gay or bisexual was. Before I even knew what sex was or what I was feeling. My first crush was on a friend in the first grade, when I was 6 years old. I thought he was the coolest, cutest boy in the world and I wanted to be with him all the time.
9. I've always loved to see other boys shirtless, and to this day a nice chest is one of the best things a guy can have in my opinion. I absolutely love nipples, both guys' and girls'.
10. Despite my first experiences at age 13, there was a very long dry spell throughout my teenage years. I was confused, lonely, depressed and withdrawn. By age 21 I was finally figuring myself out, discovering who I was in many aspects. I began coming out to friends and met my first boyfriend. He was 16 but more experienced than I was. The sex we had (lots of oral, no intercourse) was great. It didn't last long. He dumped me gently. The pain lingered for a long time, even after I moved on to others.
11. I think friends with benefits can be great, and I've had a few. But they can get awkward too, when one person develops deeper feelings and you have to let them down. I'm not the kind to believe that sex has to include love in order to be fun. Sex with someone you love deeply is the best, true lovemaking, but sex just for the sake of sex is very fun in itself.
12. I think I was 23 when I officially lost my virginity and had intercourse for the first time. I was really into the guy, he was 21. We agreed to take things slow, but I really didn't want that, I wanted sex. One night he gave me a blow job, and then decided that he did want to have sex. It was a great first time for me. I fucked him for what seemed like hours and came three times that night. In our passion neither one of us thought about using a condom. For some time after that I was afraid of what I may have caught. Fortunately for me, I didn't catch anything. I learned my lesson, and was always safe after that.
13. Not long after that I got fucked by a guy for the first time. It was a guy I had dated for a while, then we decided to just be friends with benefits. It was a good first time, I'm glad it was with him. But after that I was ready for some outright slutty fucking.
14. I began getting the slutty fucking soon after with a couple other friends with benefits. I discovered how much I love the slutty naughty feeling of being fucked doggy style over the back of a couch or on a futon. And how much I like getting my ass eaten while I suck cock on a 69. It was a bit of a slutty phase when I decided to give up on trying to find a LTR and just screw for the fun of it.
15. Honestly I much prefer being a top doing the fucking than being the one getting fucked. Under the right circumstances, with the right guy (usually an older guy) I like to get fucked. I fantasize about a handsome older guy who is slightly dominant but not in a humiliating or aggressive way. He's powerful but cares about me and my pleasure. He has a very attractive body and a big cock and I give myself up completely to his forceful but attentive fucking. I've never had that for real, only a few pale imitations. But usually I like being the older guy fucking the younger hottie.
15. I find my sexuality to be extremely liberating. It is such a part of who I am and how I see the world. I wouldn't be who I am today if I hadn't taken the journey of sexual discovery that I have. Bisexuality is no mystery or confusion to me, its simply a freer, less restrained form of sexuality. I don't limit myself to the arbitrary rules society makes about the roles we're supposed to play. What I don't understand is the straight people who are supposedly so disgusted by the thought of gay sex, or gay guys who are so disgusted by the thought of a vagina. Its all natural to me and great in its own way. The only unnatural thing to me is the revulsion we're taught by own society/culture.
16. There was a time when I was confused by it. I knew from the start of puberty that I was attracted to other boys but all I knew of gay people were negative stereotypes. I would think, 'I can't be gay, cause I'm not like that.' One day in my mid teens I was struggling with this inner conflict, I was crying from the thought that I was doomed to become those stereotypes. And then, like a light bulb, the realization came to me that I am who I am, and having sex with guys wasn't going to change that. I wasn't sure how it was all going to work, and the idea of "coming out" wasn't even on the radar for me, but that was the start of coming to terms with my sexuality. A wider world began to open.
17. I think I have something of an oral fixation. I'm not the kind of person to chew on pencils or stick my fingers in my mouth all day long, but the most arousing sex acts for me involve my mouth. Of course I love kissing. I love to give oral sex. I love to suck on a guy or girls nipples. There is something very arousing and very comforting about using my mouth in those ways.
18. Call me a size queen, but I think large cocks are very sexy. That doesn't mean I think they're necessary. I've had sex with several guys who were on the small side but it was never an issue. Better to have a guy who knows how to use his small one than a guy who doesn't know how to use his large one. But seeing big ones is a real turn on for me, and its very hot being able to play with a big one.
19. With girls however, I prefer small to medium breasts. Huge and/or fake boobs do nothing for me. I like them natural and proportional. Like the joke, 'anything more than a handful is a waste.' I don't know if it's true that many girls worry about the size of their breasts, but they certainly shouldn't.
20. Masturbation is great. I've been doing it since I was 11 years old and still do it almost every day. It's crazy to me that some people think masturbation is wrong. Its the most natural form of pure pleasure you can have with your body. First learning that I could pleasure myself, my first orgasm, my first ejaculation...each one was such a joyful discovery for me. Nobody should feel ashamed of those things.
21. Sex without love can be great, but when it comes to love fidelity is very important for me. I've been cheated on and it hurt terribly. It made me feel unnattractive and undesirable, and it also shook my trust in other people. Was hard to get through. I've never cheated while in a relationship, and have never tried to hook up with somebody else who is in a relationship.
22. Being that I am bisexual and so accepting of sex in so many ways, it may sound surprising when I say I'm quite vanilla. Besides having sex with guys and girls, or multiples of them, I'm not into kinky stuff. No scat or watersports, no pain or S&M. Not really into toys either (altho sometimes they serve a useful purpose.) Not into leather or slings or any of that stuff. Just naked people in a bed giving and recieving the pleasure of their bodies.
23. I notice that I have moods when I'm sometimes more into guys and sometimes more into girls. At times I'm really turned on by girls in porn and then other days I'm way more turned on by boys. Of course I'll take either given the opportunity. I'd never turn down a guy cause I was in a girl mood or vice versa.
24. I love porn, at least the certain kinds of porn I prefer. There is plenty of bad, cheesy, unattractive porn out there. I prefer pics on the net instead of movies, and not the mainstream porn with make-up and long fingernails and fishnet stocking, *ugh*. I like some of the amatuer pics, the tender ones, sometimes the artistic ones...and sometimes just really slutty ones. But I always want new and different porn. Always looking, searching, exploring.
25. Is sexuality genetic or is it a result of our upbringing? I have to say, 'does it matter?' I'm sexually aroused by both guys and girls. I like to suck cocks and girls' nipples. Does it matter if I have a certain genetic combination, or if I simply choose to enjoy those things? Human sexuality is a wonderful thing, more so because of the variety of forms it takes. Shouldn't we learn to discover and accept that variety for its own sake? Our scientific knowledge and abilities mean nothing until we can mature as a society that accepts and appreciates all its diverse forms and expressions. Can you imagine how much better the world would be if nobody was made to feel ashamed for exploring or expressing their sexuality?
1. I lost my virginity when I was 16, it was something I really wanted to do. I gave it to a guy I had been with for several months, I wanted to wash away the sensations of childhood abuse and persuaded him that it was the right time. It was incredibly disappointing, like a promise unfulfilled. I just lay there afterwards staring at the ceiling. On returning home the following day I cried so hard that my little sister gave me money for the call box and told me to summon the boyfriend.
2. In the 12 years since then I've slept with 43 males and 4 girls. I think. I have a strong feeling that something will be wrong if I forget a single one.
3. I've experienced 'date rape' twice, although at the time I don't think I had my head together enough to realize that's what it was. The first time I was so drunk I was almost entirely incapable. The second time the guy just kept pushing himself on me over and over saying" you know you want to, you know you want it" until I stopped fighting and lay and looked at the ceiling, which did not seem to diminish his enjoyment. I tried to sneak out in the morning but his front door was double locked and he had the key, I had to wait for him to wake up.
4. I think I've been masturbating since I was three or four. In some ways it worries me because it wasn't just touching, I used to put things inside myself, and what three year old knows where it goes?
5. The first person to touch me up was a boy I went to crèche with. He used to make me all squiggly and wet and give me butterflies in my tummy. We were three.
6. The first person I kissed and held naked in my arms was a girl. She was pretty and naughty and I loved and was fascinated by her body. I was always hoping we'd get a chance to 'play' and was gutted when she went off me. I was 8.
7. My first French kiss was with a girl, she put her tongue in my mouth. It was fairly unappealing compared to my previous experiments, but I was thrilled and goose bumpy. I wanted more, she didn’t. I was 10 she was exactly two years my junior. I still know her and see her around, sometimes I babysit her daughter, but I pretend I've forgotten.
8. I love giving head. Love it. I've always maintained that it's the closest you can get to having someone's soul in your mouth. I have said as much to people, but they are mainly very mean and crude, anyone who says "No, it's like having a cock in your mouth" makes me want to retort “Well you must be doing it wrong then!". It's a strange feeling to have arrived at considering how I began my career of fellatio. I hated it, it was veiny and sticky and smelly and gross. I hated him for making me and I once had the most horrendous accident with my braces....
9.I used to be totally detached about sex. I didn't live with my emotions, not really. I used it like people use drugs.
10. The first girl I went down on I was dying for, I'd loved her for years. It was the most powerful lust I think I've ever felt. I still dream about her.
11. My first boyfriend kept trying to put my hand on his cock and I couldn't understand why. I was 15. I'd never met a cock and he didn't introduce me, he never spoke a word about it, just kept trying to put my hand inside his trousers. We didn't last, he was selfish and arrogant. Years later I slept with him and he wasn't up to much. Afterwards he told his mother that I'd "used" him.
12. I once experienced something like love at first sight. My heart was in my mouth. I had to know her, yet I felt I'd known her all my life, for all time. The first time I kissed her I wished I could tear my body open so she could climb inside and stay forever. She had freckles and tasted of cinnamon.
13. I'd love to have two men, gives me goosebumps even thinking about it
14. I've had a highly charged relationship with submission. Being held down, choked, having my mouth and throat filled, being spanked and slapped, having my hair pulled and my movement restricted. Kneeling down for someone. The bliss of giving myself up into someone's control. To have pain inflicted on me with perfect concentration and love has the capacity to make me unbelievably wet, amazingly open.
15. Men are supposed to be hairy; I think women who want shiny chested men are insane! I don't like them entirely carpeted, it's not a fetish and I do prefer a short back and sides on a cock. I do not think it's appealing to have to search through a jungle to find him or choke on random straggly bits. But in general? Body fur makes me purr with happiness.
16. Recently I've learned to enjoy someone handling me gently. A new kind of love. It sometimes reduces me to tears mid screw. My therapist thinks I cry because I don't know how to accept good things in my life.
17. Aged 28 I discovered one day that I was able to squirt. I soaked the towel I was sitting on and the carpet in front of me. It was a self powered orgasm, OK, I had a small vibe inside me and my electric toothbrush on my clit, but no helpers. At the time I was having web-cam sex with a guy I have never met. I was so shocked I nearly fell off the chair. I cannot 'do it' on command, I have yet to work out the controls, as much as any guy might want me to (and they do).
18. I'm loud. Really Quite Loud. I find it hard to let go because I know I'll make vocal my enjoyment. Usually at quite a high volume. If you're not sure if I'm close you can listen out for the cry of "
19. I'm sticky. I mean down-my-legs-wet with trails of juice joining my kitty to my thighs sticky. Anyone who's ever really turned me on has commented on it. Actually the first time I got naked with a boy he said “urrr it’s all slimy”, I was mortified, it took me years to become comfortable with my own kitty. I love her now.
20. I adore having sex in the shower. It's like having permission to do everything with impunity. All my hang ups about cleanliness can fuck off and I can concentrate on enjoying myself. And I do. Vocally and at length, with or without a partner. My flatmate hates it.
21. I swallow, unless I don't like you. On rare occasions when I have a very empty stomach I will abstain, cause that just gives me indigestion. On the whole I tend to think it's strange to spit something out that you worked so hard to get.
22. I prefer the willy as god created it. Circumcision is for people who can't wash surely? If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it. I would certainly never consider surgically remodeling my genitalia and don't know why anyone ever would. I want to slap girls who keep on about how ugly willies are. How can you be kind to something you hate? It's ludicrous! They should leave them alone.
23. My ex boyfriend is the best lay I've ever had. I felt like he saw me completely, saw through me. We started out at a time when I was fresh out of a two year relationship and and even longer running illicit affair. I was looking for someone to abuse me, literally, I was trawling the internet. He saved me, and taught me to accept the pain he doled out with love, to submit to only him. It was the first time I've ever really been able to let go. I would do anything he said, and even now I'm at risk of getting down for him if he says so.
25. I use sex to drown out the noise in my head, to blot out realities I'd rather not confront.
I do things with people who I shouldn't and it spoils things. I've slept with 99% of my male friends. Recently I cheated on my boyfriend whilst he was away though I'd decided to be really good whilst he was gone. I did it with my ex (see #23) , with a friend of mine who I've known since he was a baby and is 11 years younger than me , with my oldest friend and his fiancee . Also I was paid by an old friend for favours.
I wish I hadn't done any of it. I'd like to be good. To be beautiful. Not to need that kind of distraction or validation.
I think I do what I do because I want people to think as badly of me as I do of myself.
1-I've been masturbating since I was about 3, but never got a lecture from my parents on it. I guess I somehow did it without them knowing.
2-I've had 13 sex partners so far, and I want to put more under my belt in the future.
3-All of them have been men, but there are a few woman that I want to experiment/casually fool around with. I kissed a girl once, but it was sloppy and she wasn't that attractive.
4-My first kiss almost turned into my first lay on the same night. We would have hooked up in the back of his car. We both got naked and it was the first time I gave head too. We were about to go at it but he prematurely ejaculated. So I had to deal with the burden of virginity for another 4-5 months.
5-I lost my virginity at 19 to someone that just felt like a friend. During that "relationship" I was in a long distance relationship with someone that I thought I loved. It took me 4 months to get the guy I was physically dating to put out. He was a virgin too.
6-My second lay was a black Jehovah's witness that may have been secretly gay. He complained to one of our friends that all I wanted to do was just make out and have sex.
7-The third lay was one of the greatest I had. He was small, but it felt amazing. We did it while I was apartment/dog sitting over the holiday for 3 days, then he said that he didn't want to pursue a relationship since he "had issues." He was actually an ex of a classmate she met on MySpace.
8-The fourth was married and we went at it for a little over a month. That was a bad time for me and I used him as an escape mostly. My parents found out and weren't happy (they're Catholic). He was also the first person I had car sex with.
9-I've actually never had sex in any of my own cars, but in my parents' van, a rental car, and a coworker's truck
.
10-During the time I was banging the married guy, I kept a friends with benefits thing with my first ex on the side as well. Actually that ex was usually a booty call. He was (still is most likely) an idiot, but it was convenient cock. I actually kept banging him until I left for Colorado.
11-After moving back to Colorado I went on an 8 week dry run since I was trying to "stay faithful" to the long distance guy. I hooked up with a guy that had a pierced cock. His family was on a camping trip and we banged in parents' bed. I screamed like an elk and he thought someone was going to call the police.
12-I can get very, VERY loud.
13-The next guy was a coworker, I had a pity quickie with him in his truck behind work after our shift ended. He came rather quickly because I've been told numerous times I'm rather snug. I thought he was good looking and tried him on for size, but it was dissappointing.
14-I got another part time job and met suitor number 7. He was pretty good in bed, but I didn't trust him, so we kept it to a fuck-buddy thing. I was still emotionally tied to my long distance guy. He became friends with benefits with another woman that was going through a divorce. They became a thing and he didn't tell me. Needless to say I was pissed, and I dropped him out of my life.
15- He was also the guy that took my anal virginity. I didn't like anal with him, and one time he accidentally put it in my ass and I had to try my best not to scream out in pain. At least he didn't keep going once I yelped and curled up in the fetal position and cried/whimpered like a helpless animal.
16-I tried hooking up with a stoner. We hung out for the day and he was in me for about 8 seconds then stopped since his drunk grandfather was in the next room trying to sleep. I introduced him to a former friend of mine and they became a thing.
17-The next guy was hideous, skinny like a Holocaust victim, and it felt like a skeleton was banging me. He had some issues and we did it only a few times. I stopped talking to him because he pissed me off too much.
18-The next guy was a fundy Christian. Complete prick. I had a one time thing with him because I wanted to prove him a hypocrite on the whole "premarital sex is wrong" thing. So I did, he was also short. 5'3". I"m 5'8". It was like getting banged by a bulldog or some other buff animal. He works out and is kind of top heavy in the muscles.
19-I hooked up with 2 guys in one day. I was on my period (no, that doesn't stop me). The first guy I got to cum 3 times. One with riding, blow job, and the other by doggy style. He was the guy with his penis pierced, but he had to take it out because he was going into the navy. The piercing made a big difference with him.
20-The second guy that day said that he never had sex with a woman that was on her period before and wanted to try it. He didn't tell me that blood made him feel sick. So we had sex, I went home, he didn't talk to me after. Oh well.
21-One guy that I messed around with had just bought a new Subaru STI and had a $400 jacket on. He also hadn't gotten laid in a while. We drove off to a semi-secluded place and started making out in his car. I got my pants off and he started fingering me/feeling me up, so I took his cock out and started blowing him and rubbing him down. It didn't take long to get him off, and when I did, it was like a volcanic eruption. He got his eye, his jacket, and the ceiling of the car. And my jacket somewhat too. Needless to say, he didn't talk to me again after that. Pity, he was a good kisser too.
22- Finally, the long distance guy. We had been talking via internet for almost 4 years, and phone for the last 5 months or so. I met him in a Yahoo chatroom when I was 17. I had very low self esteem at the time I met him and I thought I "fell in love with him." When I finally got to meeting him, my best friend and I saw him at the airport and he suggested that we should have left him there (that would have been such sound advice). The "lover" and I had made plans that he was going to pick me up in Colorado and we were going to live together in Texas. "Happily ever after." We moved down there and I lived with him for a month. I was stressed about finances since I had used my credit card to pay his way with hotels and such when he was visiting. That was when the using started. Eventually things went to hell because he was emotionally abusive, and I was afraid that he was going to rape me one time. The sex was awful. It was a power trip for him and he was into humiliation. To that waste of flesh, women are a commodity. After breaking up, he suggested that I become an escort to get things paid for and to buy even nicer things with my money. Needless to say, I left him and moved to live with my parents. He only knew about the first 4 men I slept with, but never found out about the last 7. He also thought he was the one to take my anal virginity.
23-This guy is my current lover. He's 15 years older than me and I get a sexual charge out of that. He's the first guy I've enjoyed anal with.He's open to trying a threesome and enjoys sharing as long as I don't forget who I'm going home with. He's a cynic about women being monogamous creatures, and I appreciate him for his realistic viewpoints. He's taken the "best bang" title from the third guy I slept with, but he also knows I'm "not done" yet either. Even though what we achieve is pretty close to "tantric" levels. Especially when we first started hooking up. Which wasn't originally intended as a "friends with benefits" type of situation. Also, he's gotten me into multiples because he has stamina.
24-I am an intimacy addict and want to have more sexual adventures. I'm even curious to try a gang-bang some day.
25- Also, I enjoy mirrors. I never realized how much fun they are until I actually watched myself getting banged one time. I need to try that more often.
2-I've had 13 sex partners so far, and I want to put more under my belt in the future.
3-All of them have been men, but there are a few woman that I want to experiment/casually fool around with. I kissed a girl once, but it was sloppy and she wasn't that attractive.
4-My first kiss almost turned into my first lay on the same night. We would have hooked up in the back of his car. We both got naked and it was the first time I gave head too. We were about to go at it but he prematurely ejaculated. So I had to deal with the burden of virginity for another 4-5 months.
5-I lost my virginity at 19 to someone that just felt like a friend. During that "relationship" I was in a long distance relationship with someone that I thought I loved. It took me 4 months to get the guy I was physically dating to put out. He was a virgin too.
6-My second lay was a black Jehovah's witness that may have been secretly gay. He complained to one of our friends that all I wanted to do was just make out and have sex.
7-The third lay was one of the greatest I had. He was small, but it felt amazing. We did it while I was apartment/dog sitting over the holiday for 3 days, then he said that he didn't want to pursue a relationship since he "had issues." He was actually an ex of a classmate she met on MySpace.
8-The fourth was married and we went at it for a little over a month. That was a bad time for me and I used him as an escape mostly. My parents found out and weren't happy (they're Catholic). He was also the first person I had car sex with.
9-I've actually never had sex in any of my own cars, but in my parents' van, a rental car, and a coworker's truck
.
10-During the time I was banging the married guy, I kept a friends with benefits thing with my first ex on the side as well. Actually that ex was usually a booty call. He was (still is most likely) an idiot, but it was convenient cock. I actually kept banging him until I left for Colorado.
11-After moving back to Colorado I went on an 8 week dry run since I was trying to "stay faithful" to the long distance guy. I hooked up with a guy that had a pierced cock. His family was on a camping trip and we banged in parents' bed. I screamed like an elk and he thought someone was going to call the police.
12-I can get very, VERY loud.
13-The next guy was a coworker, I had a pity quickie with him in his truck behind work after our shift ended. He came rather quickly because I've been told numerous times I'm rather snug. I thought he was good looking and tried him on for size, but it was dissappointing.
14-I got another part time job and met suitor number 7. He was pretty good in bed, but I didn't trust him, so we kept it to a fuck-buddy thing. I was still emotionally tied to my long distance guy. He became friends with benefits with another woman that was going through a divorce. They became a thing and he didn't tell me. Needless to say I was pissed, and I dropped him out of my life.
15- He was also the guy that took my anal virginity. I didn't like anal with him, and one time he accidentally put it in my ass and I had to try my best not to scream out in pain. At least he didn't keep going once I yelped and curled up in the fetal position and cried/whimpered like a helpless animal.
16-I tried hooking up with a stoner. We hung out for the day and he was in me for about 8 seconds then stopped since his drunk grandfather was in the next room trying to sleep. I introduced him to a former friend of mine and they became a thing.
17-The next guy was hideous, skinny like a Holocaust victim, and it felt like a skeleton was banging me. He had some issues and we did it only a few times. I stopped talking to him because he pissed me off too much.
18-The next guy was a fundy Christian. Complete prick. I had a one time thing with him because I wanted to prove him a hypocrite on the whole "premarital sex is wrong" thing. So I did, he was also short. 5'3". I"m 5'8". It was like getting banged by a bulldog or some other buff animal. He works out and is kind of top heavy in the muscles.
19-I hooked up with 2 guys in one day. I was on my period (no, that doesn't stop me). The first guy I got to cum 3 times. One with riding, blow job, and the other by doggy style. He was the guy with his penis pierced, but he had to take it out because he was going into the navy. The piercing made a big difference with him.
20-The second guy that day said that he never had sex with a woman that was on her period before and wanted to try it. He didn't tell me that blood made him feel sick. So we had sex, I went home, he didn't talk to me after. Oh well.
21-One guy that I messed around with had just bought a new Subaru STI and had a $400 jacket on. He also hadn't gotten laid in a while. We drove off to a semi-secluded place and started making out in his car. I got my pants off and he started fingering me/feeling me up, so I took his cock out and started blowing him and rubbing him down. It didn't take long to get him off, and when I did, it was like a volcanic eruption. He got his eye, his jacket, and the ceiling of the car. And my jacket somewhat too. Needless to say, he didn't talk to me again after that. Pity, he was a good kisser too.
22- Finally, the long distance guy. We had been talking via internet for almost 4 years, and phone for the last 5 months or so. I met him in a Yahoo chatroom when I was 17. I had very low self esteem at the time I met him and I thought I "fell in love with him." When I finally got to meeting him, my best friend and I saw him at the airport and he suggested that we should have left him there (that would have been such sound advice). The "lover" and I had made plans that he was going to pick me up in Colorado and we were going to live together in Texas. "Happily ever after." We moved down there and I lived with him for a month. I was stressed about finances since I had used my credit card to pay his way with hotels and such when he was visiting. That was when the using started. Eventually things went to hell because he was emotionally abusive, and I was afraid that he was going to rape me one time. The sex was awful. It was a power trip for him and he was into humiliation. To that waste of flesh, women are a commodity. After breaking up, he suggested that I become an escort to get things paid for and to buy even nicer things with my money. Needless to say, I left him and moved to live with my parents. He only knew about the first 4 men I slept with, but never found out about the last 7. He also thought he was the one to take my anal virginity.
23-This guy is my current lover. He's 15 years older than me and I get a sexual charge out of that. He's the first guy I've enjoyed anal with.He's open to trying a threesome and enjoys sharing as long as I don't forget who I'm going home with. He's a cynic about women being monogamous creatures, and I appreciate him for his realistic viewpoints. He's taken the "best bang" title from the third guy I slept with, but he also knows I'm "not done" yet either. Even though what we achieve is pretty close to "tantric" levels. Especially when we first started hooking up. Which wasn't originally intended as a "friends with benefits" type of situation. Also, he's gotten me into multiples because he has stamina.
24-I am an intimacy addict and want to have more sexual adventures. I'm even curious to try a gang-bang some day.
25- Also, I enjoy mirrors. I never realized how much fun they are until I actually watched myself getting banged one time. I need to try that more often.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
1 - This blog has become part of my (almost) daily reading and has been extremely liberating. I often try to figure out if one of the posters is someone I know.
2 - I am 23 and am going through a remarkably easy divorce right now.
3 - My husband, though a lovely man, was unsatisfying on many levels, including sexually.
4 - He was the ninth man I ever slept with and I never cheated on him.
5 - The first guy I slept with was the brother of my best friend (at the time). I was 17 and he was a few years older than me. We were both drunk and it didn't really go far.
6 - The second guy is still one of my very dear friends and the best lay of all of them. He was the only one I ever came with and to this day I regret breaking up with him. I secretly hope that we will get back together again.
7 - The third and fourth guys happened in the same night as the one girl I've slept with. We had a foursome in college. It was fun, and I'd do it again with the right people. I don't even remember the guys' names.
8 - The fifth guy was the girl in 7's boyfriend. We had a threesome, I wasn't allowed to kiss him but had a great time being fucked from behind while eating her out.
9 - The sixth guy was a total failure. I had a huge crush on him and ended up dry humping with him in an elevator one night when we were drunk. He later pulled his (massive) cock out while we were walking along a high way and I started giving him a hand job.
10 - A few weeks later I booty called 9 and we finally fucked. He was too big to penetrate me in any way that was remotely pleasurable, so I tried to suck him off, but he was too big for that too and he never came. Apparently he was pretty emotionally distraught because he ended up crying and thanking me anyway.
11 - The seventh guy was 10 years older than me, and mentally ill. I didn't know this until he went off his meds and moved across the country. We fucked like bunnies, including on his desk at work once. He was hot and I loved being with him, but it was bad news.
12 - The eighth guy was even worse news, he was even older than the guy in 11, and not as hot. He was emotionally abusive and I didn't know if I could ever leave him even though I wanted to. I met my husband and I did though.
13 - I love to give head, and I think I'm fairly good at it. I never managed to actually get my husband off this way though, and that was a huge disappointment for me.
14 - I have a hard time taking sex seriously and am often silly in bed. This usually made my husband mad and tell me it was a turn off.
15 - 5, my first, was the most fulfilling sexual relationship I ever had. I got together with him again after 6 and I broke up and we just screwed around for months. We tried a number of different things together and while we weren't a good match, we were comfortable with each other and learned a lot about ourselves in the process.
16 - I started masturbating when I was very young, I don't remember exactly when, but I do remember my mom walking in on me several times. Luckily my parents are hippies and didn't really care.
17 - My sister and I never got 'the talk', sex and sexuality were just normal conversation in our house. I never walked in on my parents, but knew the basics from very young. I learned most of the kinky stuff from the internet though. I spent hours as a pre teen and teen online in forums and on erotic websites.
18 - I had a friend when I was about 16 that would webcam with me. I didn't have one, but he did. He would jerk off and let me watch. He was also the first to go down on me. He did it just once, but it was the best orgasm I ever had. Very few guys have gone down on me since, and usually with limited success.
19 - I don't come easily. I can get myself off in about two minutes flat, but for some reason when there's another person involved it just doesn't happen. I have come with other people, like 18 and a few times with 6, but since then I've been faking.
20 - I watch porn and masturbate on an almost daily basis. My favorites are amateur porn, especially POV and public stuff. As soon as I come though, I lose interest, even if it's in the middle of something.
21 - I would love to have sex in a public or semi-public place. The idea of being caught excites me and I often masturbate while there's people close by. I even masturbated while driving on a highway one day.
22 - I totally have penis envy. The thought of being able to penetrate someone like that drives me crazy and I often fantasize about being a man and fucking someone silly. It's just not the same with a finger or strap on.
23 - My favorite position is doggy style, it's much more pleasurable for me to be penetrated from behind. I hate missionary, I don't like feeling like I'm pinned down. I'm also self-conscious about my face during sex for some reason, so if he's not looking at me I can be more into it.
24 - At the end of high school and the beginning of university I fooled around with a lot of guys. I had a mostly male group of friends and I did something with most of them. 6, 9 and 18 all belonged to that group. I also made out with another one of them, who wanted to finger/fuck me but I didn't let him (don't know why, just being a cock tease I guess). Another one I gave a hand job to while he fingered me under a blanket at a party, he had the smallest dick I ever ran across, it was about the size of my thumb.
25 - I hope to someday meet someone, man or woman, who is willing to explore their sexuality with me. I feel like I have a lot to learn and explore. This is one of the reasons I'm not sad to be divorcing my husband, as he was into "wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am" vanilla sex and not a lot of it.
2 - I am 23 and am going through a remarkably easy divorce right now.
3 - My husband, though a lovely man, was unsatisfying on many levels, including sexually.
4 - He was the ninth man I ever slept with and I never cheated on him.
5 - The first guy I slept with was the brother of my best friend (at the time). I was 17 and he was a few years older than me. We were both drunk and it didn't really go far.
6 - The second guy is still one of my very dear friends and the best lay of all of them. He was the only one I ever came with and to this day I regret breaking up with him. I secretly hope that we will get back together again.
7 - The third and fourth guys happened in the same night as the one girl I've slept with. We had a foursome in college. It was fun, and I'd do it again with the right people. I don't even remember the guys' names.
8 - The fifth guy was the girl in 7's boyfriend. We had a threesome, I wasn't allowed to kiss him but had a great time being fucked from behind while eating her out.
9 - The sixth guy was a total failure. I had a huge crush on him and ended up dry humping with him in an elevator one night when we were drunk. He later pulled his (massive) cock out while we were walking along a high way and I started giving him a hand job.
10 - A few weeks later I booty called 9 and we finally fucked. He was too big to penetrate me in any way that was remotely pleasurable, so I tried to suck him off, but he was too big for that too and he never came. Apparently he was pretty emotionally distraught because he ended up crying and thanking me anyway.
11 - The seventh guy was 10 years older than me, and mentally ill. I didn't know this until he went off his meds and moved across the country. We fucked like bunnies, including on his desk at work once. He was hot and I loved being with him, but it was bad news.
12 - The eighth guy was even worse news, he was even older than the guy in 11, and not as hot. He was emotionally abusive and I didn't know if I could ever leave him even though I wanted to. I met my husband and I did though.
13 - I love to give head, and I think I'm fairly good at it. I never managed to actually get my husband off this way though, and that was a huge disappointment for me.
14 - I have a hard time taking sex seriously and am often silly in bed. This usually made my husband mad and tell me it was a turn off.
15 - 5, my first, was the most fulfilling sexual relationship I ever had. I got together with him again after 6 and I broke up and we just screwed around for months. We tried a number of different things together and while we weren't a good match, we were comfortable with each other and learned a lot about ourselves in the process.
16 - I started masturbating when I was very young, I don't remember exactly when, but I do remember my mom walking in on me several times. Luckily my parents are hippies and didn't really care.
17 - My sister and I never got 'the talk', sex and sexuality were just normal conversation in our house. I never walked in on my parents, but knew the basics from very young. I learned most of the kinky stuff from the internet though. I spent hours as a pre teen and teen online in forums and on erotic websites.
18 - I had a friend when I was about 16 that would webcam with me. I didn't have one, but he did. He would jerk off and let me watch. He was also the first to go down on me. He did it just once, but it was the best orgasm I ever had. Very few guys have gone down on me since, and usually with limited success.
19 - I don't come easily. I can get myself off in about two minutes flat, but for some reason when there's another person involved it just doesn't happen. I have come with other people, like 18 and a few times with 6, but since then I've been faking.
20 - I watch porn and masturbate on an almost daily basis. My favorites are amateur porn, especially POV and public stuff. As soon as I come though, I lose interest, even if it's in the middle of something.
21 - I would love to have sex in a public or semi-public place. The idea of being caught excites me and I often masturbate while there's people close by. I even masturbated while driving on a highway one day.
22 - I totally have penis envy. The thought of being able to penetrate someone like that drives me crazy and I often fantasize about being a man and fucking someone silly. It's just not the same with a finger or strap on.
23 - My favorite position is doggy style, it's much more pleasurable for me to be penetrated from behind. I hate missionary, I don't like feeling like I'm pinned down. I'm also self-conscious about my face during sex for some reason, so if he's not looking at me I can be more into it.
24 - At the end of high school and the beginning of university I fooled around with a lot of guys. I had a mostly male group of friends and I did something with most of them. 6, 9 and 18 all belonged to that group. I also made out with another one of them, who wanted to finger/fuck me but I didn't let him (don't know why, just being a cock tease I guess). Another one I gave a hand job to while he fingered me under a blanket at a party, he had the smallest dick I ever ran across, it was about the size of my thumb.
25 - I hope to someday meet someone, man or woman, who is willing to explore their sexuality with me. I feel like I have a lot to learn and explore. This is one of the reasons I'm not sad to be divorcing my husband, as he was into "wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am" vanilla sex and not a lot of it.
1. My current boyfriend is my first everything. First kiss, boyfriend, sex, love, etc.
2. I wasn’t his first though. He had sex one time before me with his ex and apparently it was so terrible, he wanted to be celibate. However, he’s kissed about two-three girls prior to me, one who was a good friend of mine, and it was a one-time deal. Me and my boy were best friends at the time, and it didn’t bother me that he made out with her (apparently she was sloppy and a bad kisser). However, the mere fact that I wasn’t his first at things like he was mine kills me.
3. Going along with #2, I am pretty jealous of my boyfriend’s past “sex” life or whatever. Even though most of it was bad. I wish I had more experience.
4. It kills me even more because I know I COULD have had more experience, but passed on the opportunity.
5. Now that I’ve been sexually active, I want to go out and have more sex so that I’m more experienced and better at it. Then I want to come back to my boyfriend after we’ve been broken up and have the most amazing sex ever, just to show him I good I am.
6. He thinks that he was my second though. I told him I lost my virginity to my ex when I was sixteen. My ex and I did everything but sex. It was okay but I never got off.
7. I never really got off with my current boyfriend either until about three months into our relationship. He fingered me and I finally came. My sister was fucking her friend in the next room.. I only finished because I subtly told him the importance of the clit. He never paid much attention to it because the guys in porn never did. That amuses me.
8. I’ve never gotten off during sex. I always thought I would. When I first I had sex and I didn’t come, I was pretty upset. It still upsets me. I can’t figure out how to do it.
9. However, my boyfriend thinks I’ve always gotten off. At the same time as him. Every. Single. Time. He thinks that I’m really orgasmic. I’m not.
10. I don’t know why I lied to him, really. I guess I wanted to make him feel good about himself. He’s a good guy. However, now that I know what it feels like for him to get me off, I’m completely honest with him. I wonder if he’s noticed that I don’t finish during sex anymore. I blame the condoms.
11. I hate being on top.. I really do. While I prefer grinding so that my clit gets stimulation, my boyfriend obviously prefers me bouncing up and down, but that does absolutely nothing for me. I tell him I can’t be on top because it hurts. It doesn’t. It’s just uncomfortable and I’m lazy.
12. I think I’ve always been bad on top. When I was a kid, my friend and I would grind and make out through a pillow. I tried to be on top one time, but after a short time she told me I was doing it wrong so we switched.
13. That friend was my first “real” kiss. It was in my backyard. We’re both girls. She tried sticking her tongue in my mouth, but I was too afraid to part my lips for her. My mom caught us and freaked out. I think she’s a closet homophobe, but that’s beside the point. I was a kid, probably 9 or 10. I guess that was my first kiss but I don’t consider it as such.
14. My current boyfriend is very sweet and all, but I’ve kind of felt pressured by him. Before we started dating, we were fooling around (aka grinding) and he took off my bra and shirt. I wasn’t really comfortable with this, but I didn’t really know how to say no. I just wanted someone to touch me, I suppose. I felt like the only 17 year old with virtually no sexual experience.. Then he stuck his hand down my pants and fingered me, without even asking. It was a day after we started dating. I wasn’t comfortable with this either but I didn’t know how to stop it. I was terrified of returning the favor by giving him a handjob, so he went home dissatisfied quite a few times before I caved in. He would jokingly complain that he got blue balls. I took the hint.
15. The first time I gave him a handjob was the first time I touched a penis. I was stroking him for about ten seconds tops when he came. I didn’t actually look at his dick until a few times after that.
16. The first time I gave him head I really didn’t want to. He kept hinting and hinting at it and seemed to be pretty disappointed when I jokingly said I would and then never did. I said I was teasing him, waiting until he was begging for it before I went down on him. In reality, I was stalling for time. I lead him on by accident. When I finally gave him a blow job, he lasted about five seconds before he came. I did it again a few minutes later. He lasted longer. Those first two times he told me he was coming so I could remove my mouth. The third time, he was distracted because it felt so good and forgot to say something, and he ended up coming in my mouth. I swallowed. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I’ve swallowed ever since.
17. I used to hate giving head; now I love it. I still hate giving handjobs though. I never do it because he prefers head anyway.
18. I’ve never received oral. He licked me while fingering me, but that was because I was getting kind of dry down there. I’m kind of self conscious about myself down there, but I find myself wanting him to do it. But I don’t want to ask him because I don’t think he’s very comfortable with idea, and I don’t want to pressure him the way he pressured me. I know how it feels.
19. When my boyfriend and I first started fooling around, I was so self assured and aggressive. I was bold, open, adventurous. He liked it. I’m not like that anymore, not that that extent. I’m lazy because I know he’ll do all the work. I mean, I’ll give him head and still put in a good amount of effort, but I’m not as kinky as I once was. I honestly don’t know what happened.
20. When my boyfriend and I first started having sex, I always initiated it. I’ve basically taken control of him on the spot and had my way with him. Then he told me I was kinda pushy when it came to sex so I’ve never been that dominant again. Now he says he wants me to spontaneously take control and “rape” him. I won’t do it because I always remember that comment.
21. I make a lot of noise, even at the littlest touch. I want him to know that he’s pleasing me. I wish he would return the favor more often. He’s pretty quiet and I never know if he’s enjoying himself as much as I’d like. In fact, I wish I received any sort of feedback. Even criticism.
22. I let my boyfriend finger me before he kissed me. He got my shirt off before he kissed me. We gave each other hickeys that trailed down our necks to our chests and across our shoulders before he kissed me. He had to hold me down to kiss me. I laughed afterwards and he thought it was weird.
23. On a totally unrelated note, I have fantasies of my recruiter taking me into the bathroom in his office and fingerfucking me. I guess fucking would be nice too.
24. I wish I was better at sex.
25. Sex was more exciting when I wasn’t getting it. Now that I am it isn’t so exciting anymore. I like it of course, but I don’t crave it like I used to. In compiling this list, I’ve realized that I have a shitty sex life. Wow. I know it’s my fault. I feel guilty because my boyfriend loves me beyond comprehension and I know all he wants to do is to please me.
2. I wasn’t his first though. He had sex one time before me with his ex and apparently it was so terrible, he wanted to be celibate. However, he’s kissed about two-three girls prior to me, one who was a good friend of mine, and it was a one-time deal. Me and my boy were best friends at the time, and it didn’t bother me that he made out with her (apparently she was sloppy and a bad kisser). However, the mere fact that I wasn’t his first at things like he was mine kills me.
3. Going along with #2, I am pretty jealous of my boyfriend’s past “sex” life or whatever. Even though most of it was bad. I wish I had more experience.
4. It kills me even more because I know I COULD have had more experience, but passed on the opportunity.
5. Now that I’ve been sexually active, I want to go out and have more sex so that I’m more experienced and better at it. Then I want to come back to my boyfriend after we’ve been broken up and have the most amazing sex ever, just to show him I good I am.
6. He thinks that he was my second though. I told him I lost my virginity to my ex when I was sixteen. My ex and I did everything but sex. It was okay but I never got off.
7. I never really got off with my current boyfriend either until about three months into our relationship. He fingered me and I finally came. My sister was fucking her friend in the next room.. I only finished because I subtly told him the importance of the clit. He never paid much attention to it because the guys in porn never did. That amuses me.
8. I’ve never gotten off during sex. I always thought I would. When I first I had sex and I didn’t come, I was pretty upset. It still upsets me. I can’t figure out how to do it.
9. However, my boyfriend thinks I’ve always gotten off. At the same time as him. Every. Single. Time. He thinks that I’m really orgasmic. I’m not.
10. I don’t know why I lied to him, really. I guess I wanted to make him feel good about himself. He’s a good guy. However, now that I know what it feels like for him to get me off, I’m completely honest with him. I wonder if he’s noticed that I don’t finish during sex anymore. I blame the condoms.
11. I hate being on top.. I really do. While I prefer grinding so that my clit gets stimulation, my boyfriend obviously prefers me bouncing up and down, but that does absolutely nothing for me. I tell him I can’t be on top because it hurts. It doesn’t. It’s just uncomfortable and I’m lazy.
12. I think I’ve always been bad on top. When I was a kid, my friend and I would grind and make out through a pillow. I tried to be on top one time, but after a short time she told me I was doing it wrong so we switched.
13. That friend was my first “real” kiss. It was in my backyard. We’re both girls. She tried sticking her tongue in my mouth, but I was too afraid to part my lips for her. My mom caught us and freaked out. I think she’s a closet homophobe, but that’s beside the point. I was a kid, probably 9 or 10. I guess that was my first kiss but I don’t consider it as such.
14. My current boyfriend is very sweet and all, but I’ve kind of felt pressured by him. Before we started dating, we were fooling around (aka grinding) and he took off my bra and shirt. I wasn’t really comfortable with this, but I didn’t really know how to say no. I just wanted someone to touch me, I suppose. I felt like the only 17 year old with virtually no sexual experience.. Then he stuck his hand down my pants and fingered me, without even asking. It was a day after we started dating. I wasn’t comfortable with this either but I didn’t know how to stop it. I was terrified of returning the favor by giving him a handjob, so he went home dissatisfied quite a few times before I caved in. He would jokingly complain that he got blue balls. I took the hint.
15. The first time I gave him a handjob was the first time I touched a penis. I was stroking him for about ten seconds tops when he came. I didn’t actually look at his dick until a few times after that.
16. The first time I gave him head I really didn’t want to. He kept hinting and hinting at it and seemed to be pretty disappointed when I jokingly said I would and then never did. I said I was teasing him, waiting until he was begging for it before I went down on him. In reality, I was stalling for time. I lead him on by accident. When I finally gave him a blow job, he lasted about five seconds before he came. I did it again a few minutes later. He lasted longer. Those first two times he told me he was coming so I could remove my mouth. The third time, he was distracted because it felt so good and forgot to say something, and he ended up coming in my mouth. I swallowed. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I’ve swallowed ever since.
17. I used to hate giving head; now I love it. I still hate giving handjobs though. I never do it because he prefers head anyway.
18. I’ve never received oral. He licked me while fingering me, but that was because I was getting kind of dry down there. I’m kind of self conscious about myself down there, but I find myself wanting him to do it. But I don’t want to ask him because I don’t think he’s very comfortable with idea, and I don’t want to pressure him the way he pressured me. I know how it feels.
19. When my boyfriend and I first started fooling around, I was so self assured and aggressive. I was bold, open, adventurous. He liked it. I’m not like that anymore, not that that extent. I’m lazy because I know he’ll do all the work. I mean, I’ll give him head and still put in a good amount of effort, but I’m not as kinky as I once was. I honestly don’t know what happened.
20. When my boyfriend and I first started having sex, I always initiated it. I’ve basically taken control of him on the spot and had my way with him. Then he told me I was kinda pushy when it came to sex so I’ve never been that dominant again. Now he says he wants me to spontaneously take control and “rape” him. I won’t do it because I always remember that comment.
21. I make a lot of noise, even at the littlest touch. I want him to know that he’s pleasing me. I wish he would return the favor more often. He’s pretty quiet and I never know if he’s enjoying himself as much as I’d like. In fact, I wish I received any sort of feedback. Even criticism.
22. I let my boyfriend finger me before he kissed me. He got my shirt off before he kissed me. We gave each other hickeys that trailed down our necks to our chests and across our shoulders before he kissed me. He had to hold me down to kiss me. I laughed afterwards and he thought it was weird.
23. On a totally unrelated note, I have fantasies of my recruiter taking me into the bathroom in his office and fingerfucking me. I guess fucking would be nice too.
24. I wish I was better at sex.
25. Sex was more exciting when I wasn’t getting it. Now that I am it isn’t so exciting anymore. I like it of course, but I don’t crave it like I used to. In compiling this list, I’ve realized that I have a shitty sex life. Wow. I know it’s my fault. I feel guilty because my boyfriend loves me beyond comprehension and I know all he wants to do is to please me.
1. I kissed almost every boy in my neighborhood by the time I was ten.
2. I let a lot of them look at me with my clothes off and some kissed my belly button.
3. I cross-dress every now and again, and I love the attention I get from it.
4. When people ask me when I knew that I was a lesbian, I don’t tell them the truth: when I was learning how to french kiss with my sister. We’re about the same age and didn’t think there was anything wrong with it.
5. Two weekends ago was the closest I’ve ever gotten to having intercourse. I denied him access mostly because I was terrified that the one time I had sex with a guy, I’d end up pregnant.
6. I’m still calling myself a lesbian even though I randomly make-out/fool around with guys. I think it’s fair since so many girls make-out (and more) with other girls and say they’re straight.
7. I’m not sure how this happens, but with every guy I’ve done anything relatively sexual, strawberries, or strawberry scented/flavored things have been included.
8. On the day after my 18th birthday, I gave a hand-job to a guy I had just met that day. The following Monday at school, when I told my crush about it, she was really jealous because she had never given a hand-job before. I was proud of myself for doing something she hadn’t since everyone thought she was a slut. I also really didn’t enjoy giving the hand-job and I didn’t get anything out of it. Ironically, my crush started asking me for advice on how to please guys and later she told me just how unpleased she was with them.
9. The first time I had sex, it was to appease my (at the time) girlfriend.
10. I’m a biter and a scratcher, and though it feels great when you reciprocate, I’ll give you hell if you leave any marks in typically visible areas.
11. I don’t understand the appeal of titty-fucking. Maybe I don’t understand it because I don’t have a penis.
12. I have had several straight women tell me that I would be perfect for them if only I was a guy. I hate that.
13. I’ve been meaning to buy this really nice strap-on, but every time I have the money, I spend it on something a bit more practical... I mean, how worthwhile is it to have a strap-on with no one to fuck?
14. My current crush saw me one day when I was wearing suspenders. She told me that she was tempted to snap them, but she said she didn’t want to hurt me. I told her that I wouldn’t mind at all.
15. She didn’t because we were at work. Yeah, I definitely have a hard time keeping my mind straight when we’re both on the clock.
16. The best sex I ever had was on a staircase.
17. Second-best was in a library.
18. Once, when helping my friend pick out some new clothes, I saw her, through the slats in the dressing room door, bent over in only her thong. I tried to look away, but in order to hear her through the door, I had to be right next to it. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about that moment. Most of the fantasies included the strap-on mentioned in #13.
19. I love bending women over and finger-fucking them, doggy-style.
20. I’m very, very loud.
21. I can spend endless amounts of time going down on women, but I can also be quite the pillow princess.
22. I love hearing other people fucking, especially if it wakes me up in the middle of the night.
23. Dressing-up and role-playing really, really turns me on.
24. I love ice cubes and hot wax.
25. I’m definitely going to pleasure myself while perusing this blog every once in a while.
2. I let a lot of them look at me with my clothes off and some kissed my belly button.
3. I cross-dress every now and again, and I love the attention I get from it.
4. When people ask me when I knew that I was a lesbian, I don’t tell them the truth: when I was learning how to french kiss with my sister. We’re about the same age and didn’t think there was anything wrong with it.
5. Two weekends ago was the closest I’ve ever gotten to having intercourse. I denied him access mostly because I was terrified that the one time I had sex with a guy, I’d end up pregnant.
6. I’m still calling myself a lesbian even though I randomly make-out/fool around with guys. I think it’s fair since so many girls make-out (and more) with other girls and say they’re straight.
7. I’m not sure how this happens, but with every guy I’ve done anything relatively sexual, strawberries, or strawberry scented/flavored things have been included.
8. On the day after my 18th birthday, I gave a hand-job to a guy I had just met that day. The following Monday at school, when I told my crush about it, she was really jealous because she had never given a hand-job before. I was proud of myself for doing something she hadn’t since everyone thought she was a slut. I also really didn’t enjoy giving the hand-job and I didn’t get anything out of it. Ironically, my crush started asking me for advice on how to please guys and later she told me just how unpleased she was with them.
9. The first time I had sex, it was to appease my (at the time) girlfriend.
10. I’m a biter and a scratcher, and though it feels great when you reciprocate, I’ll give you hell if you leave any marks in typically visible areas.
11. I don’t understand the appeal of titty-fucking. Maybe I don’t understand it because I don’t have a penis.
12. I have had several straight women tell me that I would be perfect for them if only I was a guy. I hate that.
13. I’ve been meaning to buy this really nice strap-on, but every time I have the money, I spend it on something a bit more practical... I mean, how worthwhile is it to have a strap-on with no one to fuck?
14. My current crush saw me one day when I was wearing suspenders. She told me that she was tempted to snap them, but she said she didn’t want to hurt me. I told her that I wouldn’t mind at all.
15. She didn’t because we were at work. Yeah, I definitely have a hard time keeping my mind straight when we’re both on the clock.
16. The best sex I ever had was on a staircase.
17. Second-best was in a library.
18. Once, when helping my friend pick out some new clothes, I saw her, through the slats in the dressing room door, bent over in only her thong. I tried to look away, but in order to hear her through the door, I had to be right next to it. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about that moment. Most of the fantasies included the strap-on mentioned in #13.
19. I love bending women over and finger-fucking them, doggy-style.
20. I’m very, very loud.
21. I can spend endless amounts of time going down on women, but I can also be quite the pillow princess.
22. I love hearing other people fucking, especially if it wakes me up in the middle of the night.
23. Dressing-up and role-playing really, really turns me on.
24. I love ice cubes and hot wax.
25. I’m definitely going to pleasure myself while perusing this blog every once in a while.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
1. I'm a 34 year old black male and I've only had sexual experiences with two people.
2. The first sexual experience was a blowjob by a stripper at an after-hours club. My best friend at the time paid for it. I found out later from my best friend that I was supposed to apparently have sex with her, but I didn't even cum from the blowjob (I wasn't even able to maintain an erection), and I knew that I wouldn't have enjoyed having sex with her.
3. The second sexual experience was with a guy less than a year ago. I met him online, and after 2 months of chatting with him, we met up and spent a week together.
4. I still feel sorta guilty about that first and only (so far) sexual experience with that guy because he's physically handicapped.
5. I have had feelings that I was gay since I was 16, but I hid them behind my main interest because I thought being gay was the worst thing I could ever be.
6. I truly appreciate women, but I just don't find them sexually attractive enough to have sex with.
7. I value love with another person way more than I do sex with another person.
8. I fall in love too easily. I've been trying to change that about myself.
9. I'm heavily closeted to the rest of the world about my sexuality, although I'm out to my immediate family (well the 2 main members), and 2 of my friends that I knew before I officially accepted the fact that I'm gay.
10. The reason I'm closeted is because I don't want the stress of having to defend or protect myself from others who feel that gay is worth committing an act of violence against them. I also don't want my sexuality to define my personality.
11. The first time I really masturbated and came from it, I was 21. Up until then, I was scared by the stuff that people talked about in school, about how only losers masturbated, so I just didn't do it.
12. Ever since then, I have masturbated at least once a day, sometimes more.
13. The longest I've ever went without masturbating since starting was one week.
14. I want desperately to fall in love with the right man, and be all they intimately need.
15. I also feel like being the only man that another man intimately needs will mean that they will view me the same way.
16. I find belching to be sexually arousing.
17. Despite my size, I am attracted to thinner men. Not the ones who are necessarily in excellent shape, but just thinner than me.
18. Although I'm gay, I really don't like effeminate gay men. I can be friends with anyone, but having one for a mate would be difficult for me to deal with. My reasoning for this goes back to #10.
19. I consider myself to be a part of the chub/chaser community of gay men.
20. I never felt sexually attractive until I learned that there were others who were attracted to a body like mine. Part of the reason I denied being gay for so long was that I thought that no one would ever find me sexually attractive.
21. I have made videos of myself masturbating and posted them online in secret. I'm not really sure why I did it, but I didn't do it just to be seen since I think I'm very average as far as penis length goes.
22. Sometimes I wish my penis were an inch thicker, but I'm too afraid of having any type of surgery done for the fear that what I already have won't work properly after said surgery.
23. I don't necessarily care for anal sex, but I would do it for my partner to keep them happy.
24. More than anything, I love passion and intimacy with another man.
25. I think this whole experience of noting 25 things about my sexuality has been very liberating while allowing me to keep my anonymity.
2. The first sexual experience was a blowjob by a stripper at an after-hours club. My best friend at the time paid for it. I found out later from my best friend that I was supposed to apparently have sex with her, but I didn't even cum from the blowjob (I wasn't even able to maintain an erection), and I knew that I wouldn't have enjoyed having sex with her.
3. The second sexual experience was with a guy less than a year ago. I met him online, and after 2 months of chatting with him, we met up and spent a week together.
4. I still feel sorta guilty about that first and only (so far) sexual experience with that guy because he's physically handicapped.
5. I have had feelings that I was gay since I was 16, but I hid them behind my main interest because I thought being gay was the worst thing I could ever be.
6. I truly appreciate women, but I just don't find them sexually attractive enough to have sex with.
7. I value love with another person way more than I do sex with another person.
8. I fall in love too easily. I've been trying to change that about myself.
9. I'm heavily closeted to the rest of the world about my sexuality, although I'm out to my immediate family (well the 2 main members), and 2 of my friends that I knew before I officially accepted the fact that I'm gay.
10. The reason I'm closeted is because I don't want the stress of having to defend or protect myself from others who feel that gay is worth committing an act of violence against them. I also don't want my sexuality to define my personality.
11. The first time I really masturbated and came from it, I was 21. Up until then, I was scared by the stuff that people talked about in school, about how only losers masturbated, so I just didn't do it.
12. Ever since then, I have masturbated at least once a day, sometimes more.
13. The longest I've ever went without masturbating since starting was one week.
14. I want desperately to fall in love with the right man, and be all they intimately need.
15. I also feel like being the only man that another man intimately needs will mean that they will view me the same way.
16. I find belching to be sexually arousing.
17. Despite my size, I am attracted to thinner men. Not the ones who are necessarily in excellent shape, but just thinner than me.
18. Although I'm gay, I really don't like effeminate gay men. I can be friends with anyone, but having one for a mate would be difficult for me to deal with. My reasoning for this goes back to #10.
19. I consider myself to be a part of the chub/chaser community of gay men.
20. I never felt sexually attractive until I learned that there were others who were attracted to a body like mine. Part of the reason I denied being gay for so long was that I thought that no one would ever find me sexually attractive.
21. I have made videos of myself masturbating and posted them online in secret. I'm not really sure why I did it, but I didn't do it just to be seen since I think I'm very average as far as penis length goes.
22. Sometimes I wish my penis were an inch thicker, but I'm too afraid of having any type of surgery done for the fear that what I already have won't work properly after said surgery.
23. I don't necessarily care for anal sex, but I would do it for my partner to keep them happy.
24. More than anything, I love passion and intimacy with another man.
25. I think this whole experience of noting 25 things about my sexuality has been very liberating while allowing me to keep my anonymity.
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