Tuesday, April 7, 2009

1. When I was around 12 years old I was in love with my best friend and didn't realize it. I thought it was normal for two girls to shower together, spend every moment together, and to have pictures of each other on us all the time. I was completely possessive.

2. I once pretended to be a guy she met online and we would have "cyber-sex." She eventually found out and it was completely embarrassing. I think what turned me on the most was pretending to be a man having sex with a woman. The idea of gender play still turns me on, but I haven't acted on it.

3. I've only had sex with two men. I never bothered to count all of the women.

4. One of those men was an asshole and raped me. I was sixteen, drunk, and my friends abandoned me. I remember blacking out every couple of minutes and when I came to he was forcing me down on him, taking my clothes off, and trying to fuck me. I never said anything, because so many people were friends with him. While I've come to terms with it and moved on, I think it has had an effect on how I feel about men sexually.

5. I tend to be very aggressive and dominant in most of my sexual encounters. I think it's just natural for me to be in control. I want someone to take that control from me.

6. I can't help that I love to bite and scratch. I accidentally drew blood on the back of one of my lovers and while I felt bad later on, I was also very turned on by it. She was okay with it too. We joke about it now.

7. I've only been in one monogamous relationship (that lasted longer than a month) and I don't think I could do it again. I didn't know that there were any other options so I've just avoided dating for years now. My ideal relationship style is probably my own version of polyamory.

8. I love queer porn. Of course I love to watch women masturbate or fuck, but something about gay porn also turns me on. Not turned on by heterosexual porn, but when it comes to gay men fucking each other, I can't resist. I think it has to do with the energy and force. I love it.

9. Flirting, foreplay, and tension turn me on so much that I put it right up there with my love for orgasms.

10. I would rather watch a lover have an orgasm at my hand, her own, or someone else's than have one myself.

11. I've mostly given men head, but oddly have only gone down on one woman. I love it, but I think I'm too intimidated in the heat of the moment. Theory and practice are two very different things. I'm working on it.

12. In elementary school there was this girl I thought was really hot and I used to imagine her tied up and gagged, being flogged by a bunch of men. I hated even thinking about it because it turned me on and I thought it was terrible at the same time.

13. One of my fantasies to this day is as simple as showering with another person. I don't really like water, but something about a controlled amount of hot water and being so close to someone else's nude amazing body is a huge turn on.

14. Imagining a lover with someone else used to make me jealous, but in some way now it arouses me.

15. I tend to flirt with a lot of different people, but don't usually act on it. Sometimes that's as far as my sexual interest takes me, and sometimes I'm just not really in the mood to do anything about it.

16. When I moved to a new, inspiring city I was looking for some kind of comfort. I slept with this girl I met at the dorms and we became friends with benefits. I wasn't really emotionally attached so I didn't consider is anything other than that. I didn't want to be with her. I didn't even like holding hands with her in public. It was a long, draining, frustrating situation, but I finally ended it because we were looking for very different things. We don't talk anymore.

17. If I didn't love the female body so much, I would much rather be a man. I don't think it's vain to love looking at my soft skin and breasts in the mirror.

18. I love breasts and curves so much that I can hardly keep my hands off of the person I'm sleeping with or next to, depending on the relationship. I just love to lightly trace her entire body with my fingertips.

19. People that are more sexually experienced than me (I'm not really that experienced) intimidate me, but that anxiousness and tension arouses me.

20. I somewhat recently bought my first vibrator, and I can't imagine masturbating without it now. What the hell took me so long?

21. I love dirty talk, though I'm not that good with it yet. Just hearing what someone wants to do to me is such a huge turn on. And please tell me you want to fuck me. So hot.

22. I'm not big on PDA, but when I'm turned on or drinking I can't help myself! Fondling, fingering, or fucking in a public place is definitely a fantasy.

23. Sex was never talked about in the very conservative area that I'm from and no one seemed to have sex toys or any kind of alternative sex play. Because of that I wasn't exposed to it outside of the internet until about two years ago now. I'm still catching up.

24. Once I've had sex with someone I'm much more open and aggressive, but until then I tend to be pretty shy and unsure. Unless of course I am intoxicated.

25. I once made out with two other people at the same time on some random rooftop where we were partying. It was my best friends brother and girlfriend. I wanted to make out with her, and that was the way the deal worked out. It was really hot, and I think because of that I'd definitely love to try out a threesome eventually.