Wednesday, January 27, 2010

1. I lost my virginity when I was 15 to a guy who was 16. We were both virgins. We’d been together for two years, officially dating for six months, and are still together and happy (I’m 18). We had tried having sex a week before we finally did, but stopped because we didn’t have a condom. Now we fuck almost exclusively condom-less. I enjoy skin-on-skin, but it scares me. I’m too young to be a mother.

2. I can remember masturbating all the way back to when I was in a car seat (maybe 18 months old). I’d rock back and forth, similar to the motion of girl-on-top, whenever my family went on road trips, then eventually when I was alone in my room. I’ve always done this, and it wasn’t until I was maybe 12 or 13 that I realized that it was, in fact, masturbation.

3. I get random moods where I just want to give blowjobs. I don’t know why this is – it’s not even that I’m horny. I just want to feel the head of a penis in my mouth.

4. I often get girl crushes. The most I’ve ever done is kiss a girl, but I love breasts and women with nice asses.

5. I didn’t realize that I was attracted to the guy who is now my boyfriend until I thought about him when I was masturbating.

6. I really, really love having sex in public places. Nothing is sexier to me than being overcome with passion and knowing that we could get caught at any time.

7. I’ve always been a bit of a secret exhibitionist and got off on the idea of someone looking at my body. When I was 13 I stepped out onto a hotel balcony naked for about ten minutes. It gave me such a rush.

8. I’m attracted to criminals – specifically serial killers. I don’t know why. Ted Bundy is my cup of tea. I’m really scared I could become a groupie.

9. When my female cousin and I were young we used to pretend that we were getting married. We would always kiss and then dare each other to get naked.

10. I was molested when I was around 4 or 5, but I didn’t realize it until I was a teenager. I don’t think I repressed the memory because it doesn’t really bother me today. The only reason I remembered was because my cousin was there as well and we realized what happened together one day. My aunt had a male friend who would often make the two of us come sit on his lap, and one time when all the other adults had left things definitely got out of hand on his part. I’m sort of worried that since this didn’t scar me something’s wrong with me.

11. My best friend is a shy guy who’s a virgin. He has a girlfriend but she doesn’t seem interested in anything other than kissing. Ever since they started dating, I’ve become extremely jealous and fantasized about dominating him. I would never do it because I couldn’t do that to him and I couldn’t do that to my boyfriend... but I think about it often. The thoughts make me feel like a horrible person.

12. The time that I had sex the longest both my boyfriend and I had been smoking marijuana. We were randomly outside in someone’s shed in the middle of the night. We went at it for four hours. It was worth it.

13. I AM a girl who loves porn – but I only like to watch porn with women in it. I don’t know why this is. I find their bodies luscious and the only penis I’ve ever really found aesthetically pleasing is my boyfriend’s.

14. Semen has always tasted like pennies to me.

15. I can’t make myself cum with my fingers.

16. My boyfriend cheated on me. Once. He didn’t have sex; it was a random blowjob when he was drunk and he hadn’t gone looking for it. He regretted it afterwards. His friend told me, and my boyfriend doesn’t know I know. I think it would hurt me more to tell him than it hurt me when I found out. I have never discussed it with anyone but the person who told me.

17. I fantasize about rape. I have never told anyone.

18. I feel sexiest when I haven’t eaten and can feel the hunger in my belly.

19. I enjoy sexual tension more than I actually enjoy sex. Sexual tension could go on forever; sex eventually has to end.

20. I hate the whole vampire thing, but am turned on every time I see a man covered in blood.

21. I found my boyfriend sexiest when he broke his shoulder and had his arm in a sling.

22. I hate cologne. I love body smells – natural odor. That turns me on.

23. I love chubby men. Especially Jewish ones. With beards. I often get laughed at because of this.

24. The first time I gave a blowjob was in the back of my mother’s car. It was nighttime and she was driving. My boyfriend and I were alone in the backseat. I was bored, and we had a blanket overtop of us, so I whispered, “I have a bad idea,” and dove under. He was speechless for quite a long time afterwards.

25. When I’m attracted to girls, I often hate them. I find them perfect, imagine everyone else sees them so, and wonder why I can’t be like them.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

1. At the age of 20, I'm still a virgin. I wanted to sleep with my first real boyfriend (we broke up a few months ago), but he dumped me before I was quite ready to do it. He did finger me once though, but I didn't come. I asked him to stop because I hadn't expected that we'd be doing that and I guess I wasn't ready.

2. My first kiss was with a girl, in my childhood bedroom, at the age of 16. I was in love with her (mostly unrequited, though we did hook up several more times) for the next two years.

3. I started masturbating when I was about 12. I remember being on a family vacation in Florida and trying to get off in the room I shared with my sister and aunt, hoping they wouldn't notice.

4. I once masturbated in the school library on a weekend, when it was empty. (It was a boarding school.) I also got off once during a school play (I was in the audience) in sixth grade. I'm beginning to think I might have an exhibitionist streak.

5. My first sexual experiences were with my younger sister. I would be ashamed, but I've read it's not uncommon for young kids. We'd play games where one of us would be taken captive by some evil queen, who would order her burly manservants to have their way with the captive. I've tried to forget about this, because since I'm the older one I feel that I am responsible.

6. I sometimes fantasize about rape.

7. My ex boyfriend used to tell me he liked my ass and would squeeze it a lot while we were making out. I really liked this.

8. I've kissed five people- two girls and three guys. This is actually pretty representative of my sexuality.

9. I'm bisexual. I've never had sex with anyone, but I'm worried I wouldn't like it with a girl and it would damage my bisexual cred or something.

10. I watched straight, lesbian, and gay porn. Straight porn is OK, but I always feel dirty afterward. Lesbian porn I don't usually like because the girls aren't usually actually gay and they're so femmy. I like more butch girls. Gay porn is the best. But none of it's really that great.

11. The first "porn" I got off to was Gundam Wing fanfiction. I was about 13.

12. I'm scared that when I finally do have sex with a guy I won't like it or be able to come. I haven't ever had a vaginal orgasm (though I have clitoral ones, no problem) on my own, so I'm worried.

13. I love love love kissing. I like it a little bit rough, with lots of sucking. Not so much spit though. I like getting bite marks on my neck, feeling claimed.

14. I like the taste of my come.

15. I don't shave my pubic hair but I feel like most people do and I should. But I really don't want to.

16. The most exciting experience I had was with my ex and his best (female) friend--I was in the middle, both of kissing my neck (which I love) and touching my breasts. No clothes came off, though. We did this once at his apartment, drunk, and another time at a club. The second time was even better because there was this table of hipsters next to us and I knew they were watching.

17. The only problem was that the friend developed feelings for me that I couldn't really return. I felt really bad.

18. Once I found condoms in my dad's bedside table. Scarred for life. I'm glad my parents are still having sex after 20 years of marriage but I don't want to know about it.

19. I wish my clit was bigger.

20. I still think about my ex when I'm getting off (alone). I feel a little guilty about this. But not too much!

21. I'm worried I'm too fat to ever get laid. I do need to lose some weight (because I'm not meant to be this big, not because "fat people are gross" or whatever), but other fat people get laid all the time. I don't know.

22. I feel like a bad feminist because I like being submissive. I like the feeling of someone on top of me, holding my hands above my head, etc. I do want to receive oral sex though. Maybe I'm just selfish for pleasure.

23. Penises kind of gross me out, although I like the people they're attached to.

24. I think trans guys are hot. Trans women don't do it for me.

25. I have really full lips (for a white girl, anyway- like, practically Angelina Jolie) and I wonder if guys sometimes imagine what my mouth would look like while I was blowing them.

Monday, January 25, 2010

1. My first kiss was at age 12 with a Chinese boy with a mullet. I knew nothing about him and have never seen him since. It was unremarkable.

2. I estimate that since then I have probably kissed around 300 people. I love kissing.

3. I lost my virginity when I was 16 with a boy I managed to convice myself I was in love with, on a sofa bed in his living room. It was sore, awkward and left me feeling disillusioned. I thought I was abnormal for not enjoying it until me and my friends started discussing sex in depth a couple of years later. I have since come to the conclusion that no one enjoys their first time.

4. As I write this I am 3 weeks shy of my 21st birthday and have had sex with 46 men. I can name 45 of these men and am on friendly terms with around 30 of them.

5. I have also slept with 4 girls. I'm a lot fussier when it comes to girls.

6. My first serious relationship, he was a virgin, I wasn't. He loved me, I didn't reciprocate. I stayed with him for two years then broke his heart. I still feel guilty for this, and for taking his virginity.

7. He was the first person I ever watched porn with. At the time, I found it hilarious and couldn't get off on it. Three years on, not much has changed. I often watch it with my current boyfriend just for the comedic value.

8. Erotica, on the other hand, drives me wild. My boyfriend often returns home to find me masturbating while reading erotica on his laptop.

9. I cannot remember when I started masturbating, I just know that it felt wrong, which in turn made it feel oh so good.

10. If I'm alone in bed I cannot get to sleep without masturbating. Same goes for getting up in the morning.

11. My last serious boyfriend taught me a lot in the bedroom. Thanks to him I know I love a bit of pain and humiliation. He would often tie me to his bed, whip my ass raw then leave me there while he grocery shopped.

12. While fucking me from behind, he would often choke me til I almost passed out. I enjoy this so much it scares me a bit, but it's something that is definitely reserved for people I trust implicitly.

13. I hate receiving oral, but giving is another matter entirely. I'm a massive fan of surprise fellatio, whether my guy is busy with something or just waking up in the morning. Never fails to drive him wild.

14. In between every serious relationship I go through a bit of a 'slut phase' and have lots of short flings and one night stands. During one of these one-nighters I pushed the guy off me, got dressed and went back to the club where I had picked him up, much to my friends' amusement. Yes, the sex was that bad. He is the only one of my 46 I can't name, and has been nicknamed 'Fresher guy.'

15. I have only ever owned one vibe. I was not impressed; can get myself there much quicker and I never run out of batteries.

16. Last summer I dated a French boy for 3 weeks simply because I got seriously wet whenever he said "Fuck me" in french. I have since discovered this works with anyone. This has to be the strangest thing that turns me on.

17. I love anal sex but after a horrible incident with a random hook-up it's another thing I'll be saving for trusted partners.

18. The horrible incident: I had been fucking this guy for a few days, his was easily the largest cock I've ever had inside me, in girth as well as length. He suggested anal; I was wasted so I agreed on the condition that he stopped if I told him to. It hurt. Like hell. I said stop. He kept going. When he was finished I went home and cried for hours. I'm still unsure as to whether this counts as rape.

19. Cock size has never bothered me too much, as long as they're over 4 inches. I love the male genitalia and find it incredibly fascinating and arousing.

20. I'm a trained acrobat and have had sex in some interesting positions, but nothing beats the classics. Less effort involved, for one thing.

21. There are two experiences that compete for the strangest I have ever had. The first one being a drug-fueled, baby oil-soaked foursome with a good friend and a couple who had come to his house party. People kept coming into the room to get stuff and a couple of them even joined in for a little bit.

22. The second one: Fucking my best mate's brother while my best mate fucked his girlfriend in the same bed. Me and the girlfriend then fucked each other while the boys watched and shared a beer.

23. The first girl I ever slept with was also my first real love. We would spend whole nights having sex on the roof of her parents' garage while listening to grunge music and drinking expensive booze stolen from her parents. She's the same age as me and now married with two kids and a mortgage. The last time I saw her we fucked in a coffee shop bathroom while her fiancé was outside with their children.

24. I'm immensely claustrophobic but also get turned on in really small spaces. God forbid I ever get trapped in an elevator with someone I'm attracted to.

25. I orgasm incredibly easily and have been known to just by having someone tell me what they want to do to me. As far as I can see, there are no bad points about this.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

1.) Male, not straight, not into guys. Which may seem like three things, but other sexualities get one word like "Gay" or "Bi" or "Straight". My word hasn't been made up yet. I haven't found one I identify with that is commonly understood.

2.) I show up on gaydar. I have been hit on by more men in my time then women. No trans people yet.

3.) When I was young I used to fantasize about women, but thought I was gay because I was never attracted to any in real life.

4.) I recently realize I am not attracted to straight women. Which explains #3.

5.) I lost my virginity at 24, to my first girlfriend.

6.) I let her sleep with another guy after we were together for 6 months. It went well and was a liberating experience for me.

7.) She started a relationship without asking first, thereby cheating. We broke up soon after. Which was traumatic. She managed to cheat on someone who is OK with all kinds of relationships. Which is kind of an achievement really. Vowed that I would never ever cheat on anyone because of that.

8.) Had my first threesome with my second girlfriend and a mutual friend. MFM.

9.) He is bi and I really gave myself permission to do whatever I wanted to him... Realized I didn't want to do anything to him. He was extremely nice about the whole thing.

10.) I did kiss him... It was awkward. But made her hot.

11.) Met my future wife and fell in love, lust and partnership.

12.) Broke up with second girlfriend and promised to stay friends. The break up went well... Then I was a terrible friend to her while focusing too heavily on the new girl. Which kind of violated the spirit, although not the wording, of the vow from # 7.

13.) Thought future wife was straight and I would have to be monogamous. Sad boy. :(

14.) We were together for a year when she asked if she could date another guy. Ecstatic boy! So relieved.

15.) After being married for a year I met my fourth girlfriend.

16.) Fourth girlfriend has PSAS, and is amazing in bed.

17.) We date for a couple of months and she starts getting jealous and we realize that she is not cut out to be an "Other Significant Other." There are many things that she deserves in a relationship that I can't give her, and it hurts both of us. So we decide to break things off.

18.) During this time my wife starts seriously dating her boyfriend. Who is an awesome guy, and a great friend.

19.) My wife is terrific and understanding and my emotional rock during the breakup.

20.) Realized that the relationship between your partners is critical. My wife and girlfriend didn't have much of a relationship, but did respect each other. Things would have gone better if they had established more of a connection.

21.) Discovered that you can be totally in love with your wife, and depressed and sad that you have broken up with your girlfriend at the same time.

22.) Discovered that dancing with both of them at the same nightclub can be really fun, but can also have emotional consequences.

23.) Dating while married is so much easier, emotionally, than dating while single. See #19.

24.) Still wish I had a girlfriend, miss her terribly. Realized that triad is my natural and preferred state. Which may not be fair to my wife, as when we married that wasn't really the plan. But people grow and change over time, and it is not a threat to my happy marriage, yet.

25.) They say that the average member of the population tends to have the same number of lovers before marriage as they do after marriage. I think that I will skew that statistic a bit over the course of my lifetime. Here's hoping!