Thursday, April 22, 2010

1. I have an amazing mother; I think I get my positive attitude about sex from her. She explained sex to me as a natural, biological process and has always been supportive of me expressing my sexuality safely.

2. When I told her me and my boyfriend were doing more then kissing she just wanted to know if I needed condoms. Having her nonchalant approval really boosted my confidence and made me feel empowered. I fully realized that I am in control of my own sexuality and can do whatever is best for me.

3. I'm absolutely terrified about getting pregnant, probably because I was the result of an unplanned pregnancy. I'm lucky because my boyfriend is understanding of this and careful. If/when I have sex I am totally going on the pill. (Thank you feminist movement for all the wonderful options I have.)

4. Paradoxically, I'm very open to sex but very picky about who I date and fool around with. I think that it makes sense to have sex for a variety of reasons and after knowing your partner for a variety of times. I also have no moral hang ups about experiencing pleasure. At the same time I need to be completely and absolutely comfortable with my partner and with the situation.

5. For this reason I've only done anything with three guys. #1 I dated briefly. We were really incompatible, but I learned a lot about what I didn't want. A couple years latter we're now good friends. #2 I had a one-night make out/grope session with at a diversity conference. We had the same sense of humor and he liked me for exactly who I was. I had fun and learned a lot about what I do want. #3 is my current boyfriend. We're in love and also totally bros, which I need. He's not perfect, but he's perfect for me.

6. I'm very attracted to both girls and boys. However, I hate the label bisexual. I don't know why either. I mean being bisexual is perfectly legitimate in my mind and I admire many bisexual activists. I just can't deal with the label.

7. Girls I just plain am attracted to. I like the way they look, smell, feel, talk, think. I would love to be physical with the right girl. I've had some very very intense crushes, but they've all turned out to be incompatible with me for one reason or another so nothing has ever happened.

8. Boys I have a much more complicated relationship with. I don't find most guys (even ones commonly thought to be hot) very attractive, though I am often extremely attracted to individual guys. Also I'm much more inhibited when it comes to being romantic or physical with guys because I can't conform to heteronormative relationship dynamics. I need a guy who gives me as much independence as I want, treats me as a complete and total equal, and accepts my more masculine personality traits. This is a lot harder to come by then one might think. Many of my best guy friends are willing to accept me doing exactly what I want and treat me as an equal because I'm a friend, yet with their girlfriends (who they respect very much and treat well) there's a different type of dynamic.

9. I'm also very open to being with someone who is gender-queer, trans, or anyone who doesn't fit perfectly with the gender binary. I believe that sex and gender are very personal and accept however people express themselves. I also find people who don't conform to gender roles very attractive, even if they do it just a little bit and in subtle ways and especially if they are very comfortable with themselves.

10. I hate hate hate having to conform or follow social rules. This means, though, that I'm just as ambivalent towards countercultures (like the gay community) as I am mainstream culture. Countercultures usually have their own rules designed to keep one from being "too normal" that are just as constraining. I'm my own mix of "normal" and "weird."

11. I'm really lucky in that my two best girl friends are very open and supportive when it comes to talking about sex. One is completely inexperienced but is into porn, slash fiction, and thinking about the theory and social implication of sex. We go on feminist rants together and talk about what it means to be sex positive. My other friend has a much more traditional view of sex and relationships then I do, but she is also open and non-judgmental of other ways of being. She got a serious boyfriend about the same time I did so we share all our experiences with dating and being physical.

12. I love masturbating! I see it as a very positive activity. It helps me sleep, makes me happier, and is a way I can be nice to myself. I have a personal mission to make female masturbation as a normal, positive activity visible by being honest about my own activities. In practice, most of this campaign involves making jokes that imply that I masturbate.

13. I love the way my boyfriend treats me. He never treats me like I'm delicate. He never gets overprotective or even protective, which I really like. He doesn't go all chivalrous and lets me carry my own heavy stuff and pay my own way. Before we were going out we used to mock fight and wrestle (in a non sexual way) and we still do that. At the same time he emotionally takes care of me really well. I'm much more excitable and angsty then he is (he is one of the most happy, steady people I know.) He calms me down and cheers me up. He know tons of little ways to make me smile and be kind to me and uses them.

14. I love my body. Sometimes I get body image hell, but usually I can talk myself out of it.

15. Despite this I've always been a little hung up that I have A-cup size boobs. I've always thought "Well I have nice boobs for the size they are." My boyfriend really, really likes my boobs, which has really helped me with this issue. He's pointed out that they're proportional to the rest of my body (I'm 5 foot 1 and 100 pounds) and that shape is just as important as size.

16. I love having my boobs played with, which works out well since my boyfriend likes playing with them. If I'm relaxed I can have an orgasm just trom them being played with.

17. My boyfriend is really affectionate and cuddly, but doesn't PDA too much. I love the feeling of
just being curled up with him. He smells really good and I feel safe and warm and comfortable.

18. Almost everything I've done sexually with my boyfriend we've had a time doing it that didn't work. We jokingly kissed a few months before we started going out (we had a very flirty friendship). The first time he touched my boobs I got really scared and he said he was sorry and stopped. The first time we fingered one another it was too intense and we both flipped out afterwards.

19. This actually hasn't been a problem, though, because we're really good at communicating. He's extremely respectful of my boundaries, and I'm respectful of what his feelings and opinions are. The best thing I think about having a boyfriend who's a friend is getting to talk about sex. We rehash our fun times together, talk about masturbating and porn, discuss what emotionally is going on, and what we like to do or think might feel good.

20. I like the way my boyfriend treats my body. He's really atrracted to me and very interested in sex, and he communicates this in a way that's sweet and friendly instead of possive or threatening. He takes things slowly and is in tune with how I'm feeling. He's respectful but also very playful. He can be a huge tease, often tickles me, and says funny things.

21. I love how reciprocal fooling around with my boyfriend is. We both enjoy when the other is having a good time, and like being the active one when fooling around. I love the way his skin feels and just getting to explore his body.

22. I'm completely okay witht the idea of porn but I've never watched it. The idea of watching people have sex just doesn't appeal to me. I do fantasize a lot, however. I love seeing sexy things in my mind; I just also like being able to control exactly what is happening. Also, the knowledge that my boyfriend watches porn and can be honest with me about it really turns me on.

23. I love kissing a variety of ways. Long, short, soft, hard, tongue, no tongue, lots of tongue, silly, romantic, can all be satisfying and exciting in the right context.

24. I'm almost completely silent when I masturbate but am really noisy when I fool around. I'm not particularly loud I just make lots of different types of noises and once I get really turned on I keep making noises pretty steadily.

25. I like happy, smiley, sweet sexy things. I love the feeling of smiling while fooling around and looking at my boyfriend and seeing the same look reflected back at me.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

1. I just had a one night stand a few days ago. I went out with this guy for drinks, only wanting to be friends. He was short, older, and just OK. At the end of the night we were walking in a park and he suddenly started touching my tits and making out with me. I slept with him to bolster my ego because the day before I had been brutally rejected by a guy I really liked. I was so hurt. So I went back to short guy’s apartment. He attacked my tits. He put my hand on his cock, which was BIG. He fingered me for a long time. He was really really good but I didn’t come. Then I got on top of him, he kept saying “Now fuck me, fuck me.” Then he got on top and fucked me so hard I bled when I was in the bathroom later. Top, bottom, top, bottom, sucking his cock, then he came. I didn’t. It wasn’t amazing, but it was OK. It was sweet. We laughed and talked. No pressure, nothing bad about it. We started talking about fantasies. When I told him I had a “Daddy” fantasy, he got so excited and hard and worked up he practically mauled me. He got behind me, he was so turned on, and said “Get on all fours, now!” He fucked me from behind, I was moaning and moaning into the pillow, and he came again. I didn’t. When I left I just laughed and he laughed. We knew we’d never see each other again. The next day I had bruises and bite marks on my tits, I was soooo sore, and my thighs ached.

2. I swear I have never been with a guy who had less than an 8 inch cock. Total coincidence. I always end up with guys with big dicks.

3. The guy who rejected me was married, because I have a total thing for married men. I wanted an affair with him so bad. When I see men on the train I will get wet and hot and horny if I see they have a wedding ring. I’ve had one other affair with a married guy and it was hot. We used to fantasize about his wife walking in and catching us and we just keep going and we both come in front of him, him while looking in her eyes.

4. I think this is twisted and I need to go to therapy for it.

5. One thing I’ve learned about sex is that men love—LOVE!—to hear women’s fantasies. It turns them on sooo much. I think even if you’re not super-attractive, having a great hot sexy wild fantasy life counts for a LOT. A lot of people, women and men, are total boring blobs!

6. I think sex is just as important, if not more so, than love. I don’t know how many miserable marriages I’ve seen where they still love each other, but they have no passion for each other. If I ever get married, it won’t be for love! I’ll get married only if it’s the hottest, horniest, sexiest thing me and my partner can think to do!

7. I love men. Love, love, love, love, love them. I love their armpits. I love their asses. I love how they smell. I love their hands. I love horny horny horny horndogs. I love the way some men stand with their hips out, cock front and center. I love men who love women! Men’s craving and desire for women turns me on. I love a man who needs a woman bad. The only kind of man I don’t really like is the intellectual type. The closer you are to a caveman, the better.

8. It is VERY hard for me to come with a partner, and it takes forever.

9. To me there are two distinct types of orgasm: the clitoral and the vaginal. I only had the clit kind for years and years and years. Then I kept trying with a dildo to have the other kind. Hello! When I finally did, it was a revelation! Whoah! It’s much harder, takes work, but Jesus….

10. To me the deep, vaginal orgasm you can only get from a cock pounding you is very mental. It takes a certain amount of thought and emotional opening up to get there. At least for me. It’s so female. It makes me feel so womanly, like obscenely womanly. Like a craven female with no need or desire other than this cock inside her. You have to really open up and let go and accept this man’s domination over your body for a moment. I know many women who have never had this kind and don’t have a clue what I’m talking about.

11. I have lots of domination fantasies. Nothing extreme or painful or weird. Just being ordered around, told what to do, giving up control completely. I want to be told when to come and when not to come.

12. I met a man online who did this for me once. He was a “Master” and I absolutely refused to meet him, but we did this thing online and on the phone. He told me when to come. He forbade me to masturbate for a week. By the end I was a wreck, but it turned me on SO MUCH to do this for him!

13. I once had sex on top of a tombstone in a graveyard at night.

14. I have big, nice boobs that men love, but they do absolutely nothing for me. WTF? I don’t dislike having them played with, but I know some women who can come just from that. They’re pretty much wasted on me.

15. I have a fantasy of me being seduced by a priest, and then being made the fuck slave/cum slut of three priests where I have to do anything they want and they use me in any way they want.

16. I think being fit, athletic, and healthy with a great body is the sexiest thing in the world. People who have to sweat and work for it, not people just blessed with amazing genes.

17. I have been fat and obese in the past. I think being fat is a way to avoid sex. And that it also means you have a totally wicked, perverted, wild craving for tons of sex that you are not living out. Who, her? Why, no one would think she wants to be brutally fucked in the ass! I think former fatties are totally wild in the sack.

18. I love anal--in the right circumstances only. When you don’t feel like it, it just hurts. But every once in a while, I don’t want regular sex. I actually feel a need to have a cock in my ass. Nothing makes me wetter, nothing. I’ve never come from it, but I love it.

19. The married guy I wanted the affair with had a fantasy of fucking a woman who was wearing his wife’s wedding veil.

20. My favorite place to have sex is outside. I love being naked outdoors! I feel like Adam and Eve.

21. I have a fantasy of having one man fuck me on a stage while a whole auditorium full of horny men watch. Especially watch me cum.

22. You’d be surprised at how many women who’ve been married their whole lives have never had an orgasm or enjoyed sex.

23. Men love their own cum. I don’t know how many guys I’ve met have a fantasy of cumming all over a women--on her face, her tits, ass, everywhere. Then fucking her with their cum still all over her.

24. I’m a lot older than a lot of girls on this site, and I want to say to all of them: don’t feel bad about anything. Sex gets better for women as you get older and it’s a much slower process than just jumping in the sack and fucking. Women are different than men!

25. Talking hardcore about sex is fun, but it’s not the be-all and end-all. In a way I feel like an impostor. All of this is true, but I’m a lot shyer and quieter in person. This is kind of my alter ego.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

01. I was not molested, but had a high interest in porn as a child and recurrent dreams about being fucked in a red sports car and women in leather bikinis mud wrestling outside of my bedroom.

02. Even though I was being fucked in the Ferrari by a man, I knew I liked girls, but suppressed it until I was 17.

03. I went to the military straight out of high school knowing I was gay, but fucked guys anyway. They were so expendable and said I acted like a boy, but liked my sex, so it didn't bother them, I guess.

04. I tried being bisexual after being out as a lesbian to prove a point that you can just love people for people and sex can follow, but I failed.

05. I tried doing #3, even after I was discharged after having real relationships with women, and that man sex was the worst I've ever had. I felt empty, but I don't regret it.

06. I like all kinds of porn, so long as the woman isn't fake-screaming like a banshee, and there are no facials.

07. I really would like to direct all kinds of (human) porn regardless of orientation, even though I have my preferences. I have a vision of how good porn should be and would like to see it executed.

08. I never plan to have a strap-on used on me, even though I've been penetrated by real penises and gotten off a few times.

09. I can count on two hands how many people I've had sex with, but I honestly don't think it'd bother me if I doubled that within the same year, so long as the sex was good.

10. I love a good intellectual mind-fuck. I actually get wet listening to smart people speak about things passionately. The subject doesn't even have to interest me off the bat, but that's what happens.

11. If someone doesn't take my socks off or demand I take them off during sex, I won't. My feet stay cold and I like the traction. I also just don't like feet to be involved in sex.

12. I honestly love making out and playing with pussy so much, I can do it for hours before actually going down.

13. I also honestly love eating ass.

14. Using only my hand with or without lube or mass amounts of pussy juice, I can orgasm in anywhere from a minute and half to six minutes.

15. I really want to fuck in a church.

16. I love fucking, but I really really really love to actually make romantic love.

17. Even though #16 is true, I don't need to be in romantic love to have sex.

18. I also want to fuck in a hospital.

19. And a grocery.

20. While I messed around with guys, I was really good at hand jobs and they let me know they appreciated it, which I find funny, because they say so many [straight] girls are bad at it.

21. I do not and will not ever fake an orgasm.

22. I've spent over three hours eating one pussy before.

23. I like when my face is glazed in pussy juice from my workwomanship.

24. I've never had group sex, but am not opposed to it.

25. I am however, very opposed to herpes.

Monday, April 19, 2010

1. I've got all female anatomy, and I like all my female anatomy, but I identify much more strongly as a guy than as a girl, woman, man, or boy. It just feels right. So I want to begin to claim the label "genderqueer," but I'm worried no one will take me seriously or, worse, people who are much more gender non-conforming will be offended that I would call myself that, too. I don't want to trivialize the much harder road people who are more visibly gender-variant are on.

2. I had my first sexual contact when I was 14, with my first serious boyfriend. He would finger me and I would stroke him, and no one ever had an orgasm, but I think of those dizzy, secretive, hormonally crazed summer nights with deep fondness.

3. My first exposure to the queer world was through my first boyfriend, who more accurately would be called my first girlfriend. She told me a few months after we began having penetrative sex that she'd always wished she'd been born female.

4. Despite #3, I didn't realize I wasn't straight until about a year later. At that time, my first girlfriend had become increasingly emotionally abusive and the final straw that made me break up with her came when she refused to allow me to go to a hot tub party of a mutual female friend. I realized afterwards that the reason that one controlling act and not all the others upset me enough to break up with her was that I was crazy in love with that mutual friend.

5. I identify as a submissive masochist, but I think I may be more of a switch on the inside. Unfortunately, I'm terrified of my sadism, so I don't think I'll ever be able to let it out.

6. It wasn't until I took an online psychological research survey about sexual assault experiences that I realized one of my girlfriends had raped me, many times. I don't know how to feel about this, or what to do about it. I would say no, and she'd pressure me with anger, wheedling, and accusations of not finding her attractive until I would have sex with her. Sometimes I would just skip the coercion part and have sex with her when I knew she expected it, no matter what I wanted. Often, I would feel a growing sense of dread and nausea as the time for bed came nearer, knowing that I would not be given a choice of whether I wanted to have sex or not. The longer this kept up, the more often I didn't want to. While I was trying to figure out if I should break up with her, every time we had sex I felt like screaming, crying, and puking all at once. I'm not sure how it was that I didn't realize this wasn't okay.

7. I told many friends about what was going on, and none of them thought she was raping me, either. At worst they thought she was demanding or irrational.

8. Despite #6, my favorite sexual fantasies are and have nearly always been rape fantasies.

9. I began masturbating when I was 6, and found myself getting aroused at thoughts of cruel, dominating, non-consensual sexuality, although I didn't know what any of it was called or what it meant. Princess Jasmine in her gold chains, being yanked around and spat on by Jaffar, sent me into spirals of lust. I had my toy ponies divided into two countries, and have one be conquered by other, who would proceed to, as I know it was now but didn't then, rape them with cunnilingus.

10. Because of #8 and #9, I have wondered if something happened to me when I was a child. I don't remember anything, and I don't have negative feelings towards any male relatives, and I also believe that fantasies revolving around power are perfectly normal to have, so most of the time I am firmly convinced that I was just born kinky.

11. I'm currently in a polyamorous relationship with a cisman and ciswoman. It's the most fulfilled and happy I've ever been.

12. #11's cisman is very perverted, and I enjoy more than he knows every time he unveils a new level of his kinkiness. On top of that, I thrill to have discovered someone who won't be repulsed by my own perversions.

13. #11's cisman rarely goes as far as I want him to go, but I know that he also stops himself short of how far he wants to go, too, being afraid of pushing me too far despite the fact that I have a safeword.

14. #11's ciswoman is a switch, and she's much more free with her dominance and sadism. The very first time we did a rape scene together, I had to use my safeword. I regret now that I did - I think I was just afraid of how deeply we were both into it.

15. I masturbate to sociological studies. The ones that get me especially hot are those that support hypotheses with well crafted quantitative research - those high levels of statistical significance really turn me on. Another type that turns me on are those studies that use thought experiments and slowly build to their conclusion. The layering of evidence and logical connections excite me like slow foreplay.

16. I have had sex with 22 people. I turned 21 last week.

17. Oh, about that polyamorous relationship - the cisman is 46, the ciswoman is 20. His age is less important than I thought it would be.

18. I have sex with people for all sorts of reasons, and I'm a big supporter of sex being something without inherent meaning. It can be like a friendly game of hopscotch, or it can be a way to express deep love. It can be highly narcissistic or giving. It can be transcendent in a multitude of ways. It can affirm ties, it can revel in anonymity. It can be anything you and your partner(s) want it to be.

19. I actually prefer threesome sex. Maybe I'd like moresome sex even more, but I've yet to try it. For some reason, relating in threes feels most natural for me.

20. I became wet instantaneously when #11's cisman told me a fantasy he'd had of me being a young man. I was wearing my strap-on when he told me this, and he proceeded to suck my cock. I came within two minutes. Since then, I've fantasized more and more often of being a young man, in all sorts of situations. For some reason, when I do this, I'm more likely to fantasize something romantic and gentle.

21. I would fuck most of the people I'm friends with, enthusiastically.

22. Reading about that study that says women register sexual response to videos of bonobos mating relieved me greatly. Animal Planet mating season shows always made me feel a little turned on, and I had been worried I was a closet zoophiliac.

23. I know smoking is bad for your health, but I have about 20 photos of sexy girls smoking saved in my porn folder.

24. There is a certain way to touch the area around my clit that I've only been able to get right with a high powered vibrator that #11's ciswoman can do with her tongue, just perfect, every time. When that spot is touched in just that way, I can orgasm nearly continuously for as long as the stimulation continues or I can't take anymore, and will usually also ejaculate.

25. When I'm frustrated, I get incredibly aroused. Marble Madness was a lust-drenched video game in my world.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

1. I was 18 when I had sex with a guy for the first time. I was 20 when I had sex with a girl for the first time. Now I'm 25 and I've slept with 3 men and 7 women.

2. I have a younger brother and sister who have had more sexual partners than me. That really bothers me.

3. The first time I had sex with a guy was with a girlfriend on whom I had a secret crush. Every time the guy touched me, I secretly hoped it was her. It never was. I really enjoyed having sex with the guy though.

4. I was 20 when I got my first girlfriend. Since then I've had four relationships, all with women. The longest time I've been really single was about two months.

5. I'm afraid I’m not that good at being alone. But then again: why be alone, if you can be with someone?

6. I know it’s a cliché, but I love being in love and I’m really good at it.

7. I have a thing for writing love letters. I believe it’s a real art to put your love, or lust, into the right words. I love writing dirty letters as well.

8. With my love letters, I’ve made people laugh, blush and cry. My ultimate goal is to make someone come, just with my words.

9. I like it a bit dirty. I think great sex should be a little filthy, very sweaty and absolutely without shame.

10. I like to talk about sex. I'm curious to what other people do in their bedroom. Because maybe they can give me inspiration, but even more so because I think people become as real and genuine as it gets when they're having sex. I think: if you really want to get to know someone, see how they have sex.

11. I could never tape myself having sex. A former girlfriend once tried, but shortly after we started my roommate came in. I think it was a sign. God's way of saying: you can better just do it than tape it.

12. I identify as a lesbian but fantasize a lot about sex with men. There is just something about a guy sticking his dick inside you.

13. Having that said: I think being fucked with fingers feels at least 10 times better than being fucked with a dick. Maybe it’s because the fingers that fucked me all belonged to girls, and as we all know, girls happen to be better in bed.

14. I can been quite aggressive in bed. I think that scares me more than it scares the girls I'm aggressive to.

15. I masturbate almost every day, some days more than once. My record is about 10 times a day. I’m not really ashamed about masturbating, and I can easily talk about it with lovers, friends and even family. I never tell anyone, though, that I use my electric toothbrush.

16. I've faked an orgasm twice, with a girl I later would have the best sex ever with. I still feel kinda guilty for faking, even though I'm sure I've made up for it.

17. Knowing that, I feel it still would really suck to find out someone faked an orgasm with me. I absolutely love it when I make people come. To me it’s better than having an orgasm myself.

18. I've made girls squirt, it's real sexy but because of the mess, there were times I performed lousy on purpose so I wouldn't have to clean up afterwards.

19. All the women I've had sex with have told me I was really good at it. I wonder if it's their low standards or my great accomplishments.

20. I believe people who are too confident are lazy in bed. I’d rather be insecure than lazy. The biggest compliment someone ever gave me was when she said that I am gracious in bed.

21. I love love love cunnilingus. I think it tastes sweet, and in some weird way, lying between her legs licking her pussy makes me feel safe. And of course horny as hell.

22. At the moment I have a fuckbuddy whom I love to have sex with. She has a killer body and her kisses taste like spring.

23. For the last couple of hours I haven't been able to stop thinking about this morning when she sat on top of me and was so wet, it was dripping all over my belly.

24. I’d love to have a threesome with her and a guy. I have this fantasy where she’s riding on top of him while touching herself. I told her about it. All she said (with a big smile) was "I’m in." I love her for that.

25. To me, sex is not that important; it's all about being close to someone. When I think about it, my favorite part about sex (apart from getting her off) is when you’re both immensely sweaty, crawl into each other's arms and fall asleep.