Wednesday, November 4, 2009

1. I'm an 18 year old, female virgin and I'm usually okay with that. Unfortunately, because of that, my 25 points are not nearly as interesting as most people's. They're just kind of sad.

2. I'm pretty gay, but I've only dated guys. I didn't particularly like any of the guys I dated, beyond loving hanging out with them.

3. The first person who saw my breasts was my only serious boyfriend. He was disappointed... He'd never say it, but I knew he was by the look in his eyes. Realizing that a part of me could never be good enough for him (or most people) absolutely broke my heart.

4. The first and only time I ever gave head was with the same one I mentioned in number 3. I felt like I had to do it, even though I've never been more thoroughly repulsed in my life. I thought I was going to burst into tears, but instead, I made up an excuse halfway through and ran.

5. My mom once told me that any girl who gives oral sex and thinks she's still a virgin is an idiot. I don't believe this, but it still crushed me a little bit.

6. My first orgasm was a complete accident. I was 11 or 12 and just messing around on my bed one day and out of nowhere, I came. It was really exciting for me, like I'd found some missing piece in my life. I was very mad that I couldn't immediately do it again afterwards...

7. The closest I ever came to attraction to a guy was with my best friend in the world. We decided to do the whole 'friends with benefits' deal, with only one rule. He would not fuck around with his ex-girlfriend and I would not fuck around with this guy he hated. When he still fucked her and lied to me about it, I lost a friend and an almost lover in a single day. We're talking again, but it will never be the same.

8. My best friend? PHENOMENAL thighs. I hate thinking that about her, because I know it would make her uncomfortable. Still, I notice.

9. I have a bit of a thigh fetish. Nice, big, thick thighs. I absolutely love them and have been known to collect pictures of people with awesome thighs. This probably makes me some sort of creeper, but I really don't care. They'll have to do until I manage to find someone real.

10. My first real kiss was with a girl who was horrified by the idea. It was a truth or dare thing, but I meant it. This is the only time I've ever kissed someone. I've been kisses hundreds of times, but I never commit to the idea. But this girl? I kissed her. And it was the most genuine thing I've ever done.

11. Porn is tolerable, but insincere. Erotica? That shit is wonderful.

12. There is nothing sexier than girls who walk around in their underwear.

13. Scratch that... I'm not pretty gay, I'm almost completely gay, except for fleeting attractions to androgynous guys.

14. I like the idea of being restrained. I'm far too controlling to enjoy myself sometimes... I need someone to force me to stop thinking so much and get lost in the feeling.

15. I still bait guys, even though I have no intention of dating them. It makes me feel wanted.

16. I absolutely loathe my nipples. I could deal with having small breasts if my nipples weren't so large.

17. Since I was old enough to reach the matches, I have been lighting candles and dripping the wax all over myself. I love the sting and I love the marks it leaves behind as proof even more... They're like battle scars, proof that I've been somewhere. Somewhere sexy.

18. Around the time I figured out the candle wax thing, I figured out that I like being smacked. It's something about the sting... I just really love that feeling. It makes me feel alive.

19. I almost like the build up and anticipation of orgasm more than the orgasm itself.

20. I am the only person who has ever made me come.

21. I can lick my own nipples, with some effort. My breasts are small, so it's a stretch, but I can do it. For some reason, I'm really proud of that.

22. I am terrified that someone I know will see this and recognize my list. There are very few people who know these things, but they do exist.

23. Strap-ons fascinate me.

24. Anal play disgusts me. I don't know if I'll ever be able to try it.

25. When someone is clearly attracted to me, regardless of gender, I am so turned on.
1) I lost my virginity at 17 and a half with the man I currently consider to be the love of my life.

2) I lost it on Obama's inauguration day, and am reminded of that first time whenever I read something that references the inauguration.

3) When I was little, my friends and I used to get naked and pretend to have sex with various movie stars and boys at school. Looking back, I feel kinda weird about it.

4) My boyfriend took me to get a vibrator for my 18th birthday. He wanted to include it in our sex life, but it's a little bigger than he is and I can't feel his cock as well after he uses it on me. I try to avoid it.

5) Receiving head used to feel good, but now it's just really uncomfortable. I don't know why.

6) My boyfriend gives me the best handjobs in the entire world.

7) Most of my close friends and I are queer. I don't know how this happened.

8) My best friend is the first girl I had a crush on. Or at least the first I had a crush on and understood that it was a crush.

9) My only experience with another female's genitalia was when I was a kid. She got a pen cap stuck in her vagina. I was trying to fish it out for her.

10) It seems like everyone I talk to's parents don't talk about sex because they're conservative and religious. My parents are ex-hippie atheists, and they didn't talk to me about it either.

11) I would like to pursue my sexual interest in women, but I'm also not sure if I could ever be comfortable having sex with someone who isn't my boyfriend. I've always been really awkward in social situations. Sexually or not, I've never met someone who puts me at ease like him.

12) I don't know how to tell my boyfriend that I'm less comfortable with threesomes than I previously thought/said I was. I don't want to disappoint him.

13) I don't like giving head, and feel guilty about not doing it more often.

14) I am an active practitioner of BDSM.

15) Nothing turns me on like being immobilized and used for someone else's sexual pleasure.

16) I often have to pretend that my boyfriend has a motive other than pleasing me when he's getting me off. I won't come otherwise.

17) I haven't quite come to terms with how much tentacle porn turns me on. I like it for the bondage/rape aspect of it, but when I'm not in the heat of the moment the furry aspect of it still icks me out.

18) I've tried anal once. I kept telling my boyfriend to slow down and use more lube, but he didn't or didn't enough and it hurt too much. He still wants to try, but I've lost what little interest in it I had.

19) The above situation did teach me that enemas are lovely. Or at least the water going in part. The part where the water comes out isn't so great. It's all very Freudian.

20) Pretending to have sex as a kid aside, I first masturbated when I was 13 or so. I was following instructions Cosmo printed for their reader's boyfriends.

21) Despite being a very sexual person, and being fairly adventurous in bed, I'm having trouble thinking of more to put in this.

22) My first kiss was really awkward. It started with one of us licking the other and eventually we went to lick each other at the same time and suddenly we were making out. It wasn't so bad until our tongues got suctioned together and made this awful sound when we pulled them apart.

23) I think bald spots on men are sexy.

24) I'm not attracted to feminine men, but a woman's gender presentation doesn't matter to me.

25) Penises don't turn me on, with the exception of my boyfriend's penis in the heat of the moment. Seeing penises in porn does nothing for me.
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1. I'm straight, but I used to question that.

2. When I was younger, perhaps four, I was sexually molested by my babysitter's son. I buried that memory, but when it clawed its way back to the surface I cried for weeks.

3. In high school I became interested in GLBT rights, which was weird because I'd never really thought about that community before. According to many of the adults around me, there was something wrong with them.

4. Once when I was discussing bisexuality with my mother, who claims to be open-minded to people who are different from her, we got into a screaming fight. She insisted that bisexuals are just indecisive; this infuriated me and I left the conversation crying.

5. My compassion for the GLBT community used to frighten me. Maybe I was gay, as everyone in school and at home insinuated.

6. As a young girl I used to daydream about having an older girl to look up to, follow around, and cuddle with.

7. My first heart-breaking crush was on a boy named Mikey. He was a whole year older than me and used big words. His crooked smile was irresistable too.

8. A string of unrequited crushes throughout my childhood made me phobic of falling in love with anyone, because I wasn't sure anyone would fall back.

9. Right now I'm in love with a boy who loves me back. Sometimes this frightens me.

10. I'm still a virgin, but I don't expect to be for too much longer.

11. I used to think I wanted to wait until I was married for sex, but now I don't ever want to get married. I sure as hell won't die a virgin by choice!

12. Sometimes when I masturbate I can't help but feel dirty and wrong.

13. My boyfriend has been extremely helpful in helping me get over that.

14. I feel fortunate to have sex-positive friends who openly and matter-of-factly assure me when I'm scared or have a question.

15. I often wonder if I'm the only girl who can happily admire a beautiful girl and not have lustful or romantic feelings about her.

16. For me, a sense of humor and intelligence are the biggest turn-ons. Gales of laughter or passionate conversations about politics get me hot and bothered.

17. I adore people who break social norms. The boys that many renounce as weird or radical make my ears perk up. Well, other parts too.

18. I love, love, love to kiss. My first passionate kisses were some of the nicest things I've ever felt.

19. Being in a long-distance relationship has helped me realize the importance of talking dirty.

20. I am very fortunate to have a partner who cares about my physical pleasure and satisfaction. (I refrained from saying "sexual" because we haven't had sex yet...)

21. I dislike the terms "boyfriend" and "girlfriend." I prefer partner... it makes me feel more bad-ass. Partner in crime, maybe?

22. I believe I have yet to experience orgasm.

23. I used to masturbate regularly, but for the past year or so I haven't been able to compel myself to spend some quality time alone. It may have something to do with the fact that my brother once caught me masturbating and called me "Sticky Fingers" for weeks.

24. My inability to masturbate could be another matter... for the longest time I had a crush on a friend I knew I could never be with. I felt guilty whenever I had sexual feelings about him, so I refrained from thinking about sex because it always led back to him.

25. I don't know if I could ever be polyamorous. I become very attached to the person I love, and I want them to want me and only me just as much. Or more.