Friday, November 13, 2009

1. I lost my virginity when I was 16 on a snow day in November to a boy I had absolutely no feelings for. The moment I saw him I knew that I would have him. He had a massive cock--it actually scared me a little bit.
2. My second was my drunken 17th birthday fuck. He was engaged and 23. He also didn’t use a condom and didn’t return my phone calls.
3. Sometimes I worry about having sex look like a movie too much to actually enjoy it.
4. I had sex with my first love twice on New Year's Eve on his mom’s old pull-out couch with his drunken brother and friends in the next room and I loved every second of it.
5. I was with him for over 2 years and he never made me orgasm, but that didn’t stop me from wanting him. Once I fucked him 8 times in one day.
6. I once made a gorgeous stranger orgasm on a plane by simply running my fingernails down his forearm. Knowing that I have that kind of power still turns me on.
7. After I have sex with someone I never want to hear from them again. Sometimes I’m afraid that my first love was the only person I can connect with physically AND emotionally.
8. I will only fuck men over 6 feet tall. There is no room for negotiation.
9. I almost had sex with a Nigerian general for money in the Governor’s Suite of the Four Seasons Hotel in Houston.
10. I love rough sex. I love being choked, tied up, slapped, bitten, pinned down--but whenever I ask for it, men are too scared to hurt me.
11. I’m only 19 but I’ve had sex with 12 people. None of them were that great.
12. I orgasm in my sleep when I haven’t had sex in a while.
13. I love having my breasts sucked, fondled and admired, but I always worry that they’ll start to sag if too many boys touch them.
14. Red hair turns me on like no other.
15. I wish I could be a dominatrix. It would be my dream job.
16. I got my clitoral hood pierced last summer and I think that it sets me apart from all the other girls the boys have fucked.
17. I have never fucked someone (except for my former love) more than twice. I simply do them and move on.
18. I hate when boys sweat on my sheets, so I almost never invite them to my place.
19. If given the chance I would definitely fuck half of my university’s basketball team… at the same time.
20. I have wanted to fuck all of my history professors since the 10th grade. Something about smarter, older men with glasses and facial hair and tie/sweater combinations just gets to me. I’ve gotten A’s in every history class I’ve ever taken, and it makes me sad. I view them kind of like a consolation prize: “It would be illegal to fuck you, so here’s an A!.”
21. Seducing boys and dumping them is my favorite hobby when I’m lonely.
22. I have never contracted an STD and I have never had an abortion, and when I think about those facts it makes me happy, especially on those lonely drives home.
23. Once I had sex on my mom’s kitchen counter while she was right down the hall. The rush was amazing.
24. I can’t wait to transfer to a different college next semester so I can sleep my way through their soccer team too!
25. I hate when boys get confused when they feel my Nuva-Ring. Stop being so ignorant, it's birth control!