Monday, December 7, 2009

1. When I was really young, I got a sexual/presexual thrill from imagining people being tortured.

2. I still do, but the torture is overtly sexual now. I come hard from this but I always feel dirty afterwards.

3. I read my first m/m story when I was 12, and didn't understand the feeling I got from it for weeks. It scared me.

4. Ever since then, I've fantasized about men together.

5. The only thing I'd ever want to do with a cisgender guy is tie him up and touch him and maybe draw on him with lipstick. I want to draw on a tied-up man with lipstick.

6. I'm a lesbian. I don't understand heterosexual discourse or what to do when a man is flirting with me or why I should care if men find me attractive.

7. I think I'm bi. I think men are so fucking pretty. I wanted to be one for a while.

8. I think breasts are thrilling because the girl is naked.

9. I love eating pussy. I really, really fucking love eating pussy. I wish my jaw didn't get sore.

10. I'm butch and I'm starting to be okay with that.

11. There's one cisgendered man in the world I would fuck. I don't think he'd fuck me, but I think we'd be friends if he wasn't famous.

12. My boyfriend is trans. I fell in love with him when he was a girl. I didn't stop loving him or wanting him when he came out as trans.

13. I think trans women are women more than I am, because they are working so hard to be accepted as women and I have never worked to be accepted as a woman.

14. I'm not trans, although I thought I was for a while. I'm a woman and I don't want to change that.

15. But I would like to live out a masculine role. I want to be Don Draper or James Dean and still have people refer to me as "she."

16. There is nothing in the world sexier than a woman who has the look and attitude of a man.

17. I like having hairy legs.

18. I've never come by the hand of another person. It's always been my own hand or a vibrator, but always directed by me.

19. The idea of having someone else make me come is scary and I want it to happen.

20. I love being tied up. I've loved being tied up ever since I was eight years old.

21. I always fall in love with my best friends. I always end up making love to them.

22. I saw my first love married, and I was happy for her, and all I could think at the wedding was that I had my hand down her pants once.

23. I still dream about my ex-girlfriend, the one that was toxic for me. I don't know why.

24. Part of the reason I love my boyfriend because he understands almost all of my kinks and nobody else ever will, not the same way.

25. I love writing stories about sex more than I love having sex.