Thursday, March 4, 2010

1. I had sex for the first time a month after my first kiss with the same guy (my boyfriend of five months), which happened the day before my 18th birthday.

2. During high school I thought I would never thought I would even have the opportunity to have sex.

3. I've been hit on three times in my life, all by guys on the street who would hit on any girl and don't (shouldn't) expect an answer.

4. Many, many people have told me I look at least four years younger than I actually am, which made me feel that anyone who would hit on me must be creepy.

5. Even now that I have more of a chest, no one hits on me. It makes me feel unattractive and jealous when I see other girls being approached by guys.

6. My current (only) boyfriend is the only guy who's ever called me pretty.

7. The only time I feel attractive is when I'm walking down the street pretending I'm a character from a TV show.

8. There have been people that I've wanted to notice me, but who I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with.

9. I can have sexual fantasies involving other people, but not myself.

10. I've never masturbated for more than a few seconds because I can't think of myself that way.

11. However, I've watched a lot of porn and don't feel bad about it unless someone brings up the subject of porn.

12. I find skinnier, slightly awkward boys attractive.

13. I like watching girls in porn and I'll pay attention to the way a girl looks/walks/talks in real life, but I don't consider myself bisexual.

14. When my boyfriend and I are having sex, I feel bad for accidentally tickling him all the time (his skin is very sensitive). And am afraid of crushing him when I'm on top.

15. I hate the fact that sexuality is tied with procreation. I never want to have kids.

16. I was the first in both of my groups of friends to have sex.

17. I am secretly proud of this.

18. Foreplay (excluding oral or mutual masturbation) is not as interesting to me as what comes after.

19. I don't think I've ever had an orgasm. This doesn't surprise me, considering #10.

20. The fact that #19 frustrates my boyfriend makes me even more attracted to him.

21. I've never gotten "the talk" from my parents.

22. On a campus where everyone claims to be sexually frustrated, I feel lucky and somewhat accomplished for having a boyfriend.

23. Eye crinkles, backs, and hip bones turn me on.

24. I like giving head more than receiving it.

25. I don't understand people who make or break romantic relationships solely based on how good the sex is. A fantastic personality makes up for less-than-amazing sex.