Saturday, January 5, 2013

1. I am a 21 year old, cisgendered, bisexual female from Texas. Only a few people know about the bisexual part.

2. I am married, and have been for over a year now. This has vastly diminished how much sex I have. I'm not pleased by this.

3. I got pregnant when I was 18 and had twin boys. This has also vastly diminished how much sex I have. I'm not pleased by this.

4. I love to fuck. Given the option, I'd rather be having sex. If it were legal and if there were fewer risks involved, being a sex worker sounds highly appealing, simply because I could get paid doing something I enjoy.

5. I was raised Catholic, to be pure and wait to have sex until marriage.  I was shamed for wanting birth control, even after having children. As a married woman, I am still shamed somewhat by my parents if I even remotely refer to using birth control. I was also raised that homosexuality was deviant and evil. I was taught that masturbation was bad and sinful. I was taught that in order to preserve other people's purity, I should always dress modestly.

6. I was around eleven when I started masturbating. I've never felt ashamed of it, even though I was taught that I should be. My parents installed a hand-held shower head when I was 10 and I discovered that it was instrumental in making me feel very VERY good. My first sexual thoughts that I can remember were about several characters from "The Lord of the Rings."

7. Up until last year, I thought I was a virgin until I met my husband. I now know that I lost my virginity to a 18-year-old girl when I was 14. It was extremely pleasant.

8. I have identified as bisexual since I was 15.

9. My first PIV sex was with the man who is now my husband when I was 18. I was his first in all respects. After three years, he has gotten remarkably good in bed. The first time we had sex, a robot fell on my head. It was NOT good for me. It was great for him. Mostly I just find it hilarious.

10. I have been the first kiss of at least 5 different males. I am indifferent about this. Most first kisses are only magical because you don't know they get better.

11. The first time I saw a naked man, it was because I came over to his house and he answered the door naked. I was 17 and I was NOT pleased. He got dressed quickly and then I came inside and we watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

12. After having children, I am now an avid supporter of feminism, sex-positivity and birth control. My parents hate this, but mostly we try not to discuss it.

13. My favorite thing to do during high school was entice as many guys as possible. I loved how they looked at me and loved being kissed and touched and wanted.

14. With this in mind, I love being in control and being controlled. It just depends on the day.

15. I had sex 8 times in one day. It was enjoyable. I think I came 6 out of 8 times.

16. I've never used a vibrator or a dildo. I assume I'd enjoy it, but I'm pretty broke most days, so I haven't been able to really think about purchasing anything in specific.

17. Getting pregnant at 18 and then married 2 years later meant that I didn't get to get a lot of my crazy out. My husband gets this and I appreciate it. It just is very very hard sometimes. I've only ever had sex with one man. I would really like to see what it is like with a multitude of other people. I have no idea if I will or not. It is just very frustrating being 21 and horny all the time.

18. I love getting oral sex. I've received from three people and the women definitely outshine the man. My husband isn't a big fan, so it rarely happens, which is also quite frustrating. I also enjoy giving. I love hearing and feeling the tension and release, the ebbs and flows.

19. I'm not a fan of porn. I don't hate it (and I have some huge issues with the industry), but for the most part, it doesn't turn me on. True queer porn can turn me on, on occasion. I love the sounds but rarely like what I see. I prefer erotic literature, and there is some fantastic stuff! However, I have to delete my history constantly, because apparently I like to read really, really bad stuff. It is embarrassing. This is one of the few parts of my sexuality that I have issues accepting.

20. I am very afraid of being outed as being bisexual to my mother. Terrified.

21. I was raped when I was 20. My therapist at the time told me that he must have been provoked by my immodesty and his frustration with his life. I haven't gone back to see her in a while and I have only just begun to make his life hell.

22. I miss having sex with girls.

23. I've had to be quiet while having sex my entire sexual life. I HATE it. The few times I haven't had to be, I love groans and screams. I want to hear my partner's sounds as well. It gets me off so well.

24. I've never been in a threesome. I'd love to try it sometime. It sounds awesome.

25. I am not even slightly interested in anal sex. Fortunately, neither is anyone else I've ever slept with.