Monday, January 25, 2010

1. My first kiss was at age 12 with a Chinese boy with a mullet. I knew nothing about him and have never seen him since. It was unremarkable.

2. I estimate that since then I have probably kissed around 300 people. I love kissing.

3. I lost my virginity when I was 16 with a boy I managed to convice myself I was in love with, on a sofa bed in his living room. It was sore, awkward and left me feeling disillusioned. I thought I was abnormal for not enjoying it until me and my friends started discussing sex in depth a couple of years later. I have since come to the conclusion that no one enjoys their first time.

4. As I write this I am 3 weeks shy of my 21st birthday and have had sex with 46 men. I can name 45 of these men and am on friendly terms with around 30 of them.

5. I have also slept with 4 girls. I'm a lot fussier when it comes to girls.

6. My first serious relationship, he was a virgin, I wasn't. He loved me, I didn't reciprocate. I stayed with him for two years then broke his heart. I still feel guilty for this, and for taking his virginity.

7. He was the first person I ever watched porn with. At the time, I found it hilarious and couldn't get off on it. Three years on, not much has changed. I often watch it with my current boyfriend just for the comedic value.

8. Erotica, on the other hand, drives me wild. My boyfriend often returns home to find me masturbating while reading erotica on his laptop.

9. I cannot remember when I started masturbating, I just know that it felt wrong, which in turn made it feel oh so good.

10. If I'm alone in bed I cannot get to sleep without masturbating. Same goes for getting up in the morning.

11. My last serious boyfriend taught me a lot in the bedroom. Thanks to him I know I love a bit of pain and humiliation. He would often tie me to his bed, whip my ass raw then leave me there while he grocery shopped.

12. While fucking me from behind, he would often choke me til I almost passed out. I enjoy this so much it scares me a bit, but it's something that is definitely reserved for people I trust implicitly.

13. I hate receiving oral, but giving is another matter entirely. I'm a massive fan of surprise fellatio, whether my guy is busy with something or just waking up in the morning. Never fails to drive him wild.

14. In between every serious relationship I go through a bit of a 'slut phase' and have lots of short flings and one night stands. During one of these one-nighters I pushed the guy off me, got dressed and went back to the club where I had picked him up, much to my friends' amusement. Yes, the sex was that bad. He is the only one of my 46 I can't name, and has been nicknamed 'Fresher guy.'

15. I have only ever owned one vibe. I was not impressed; can get myself there much quicker and I never run out of batteries.

16. Last summer I dated a French boy for 3 weeks simply because I got seriously wet whenever he said "Fuck me" in french. I have since discovered this works with anyone. This has to be the strangest thing that turns me on.

17. I love anal sex but after a horrible incident with a random hook-up it's another thing I'll be saving for trusted partners.

18. The horrible incident: I had been fucking this guy for a few days, his was easily the largest cock I've ever had inside me, in girth as well as length. He suggested anal; I was wasted so I agreed on the condition that he stopped if I told him to. It hurt. Like hell. I said stop. He kept going. When he was finished I went home and cried for hours. I'm still unsure as to whether this counts as rape.

19. Cock size has never bothered me too much, as long as they're over 4 inches. I love the male genitalia and find it incredibly fascinating and arousing.

20. I'm a trained acrobat and have had sex in some interesting positions, but nothing beats the classics. Less effort involved, for one thing.

21. There are two experiences that compete for the strangest I have ever had. The first one being a drug-fueled, baby oil-soaked foursome with a good friend and a couple who had come to his house party. People kept coming into the room to get stuff and a couple of them even joined in for a little bit.

22. The second one: Fucking my best mate's brother while my best mate fucked his girlfriend in the same bed. Me and the girlfriend then fucked each other while the boys watched and shared a beer.

23. The first girl I ever slept with was also my first real love. We would spend whole nights having sex on the roof of her parents' garage while listening to grunge music and drinking expensive booze stolen from her parents. She's the same age as me and now married with two kids and a mortgage. The last time I saw her we fucked in a coffee shop bathroom while her fiancé was outside with their children.

24. I'm immensely claustrophobic but also get turned on in really small spaces. God forbid I ever get trapped in an elevator with someone I'm attracted to.

25. I orgasm incredibly easily and have been known to just by having someone tell me what they want to do to me. As far as I can see, there are no bad points about this.