Wednesday, March 18, 2009

1. When I was younger, I felt very sexual but embarrassed by my urges. I remember doing a strip tease for my siblings and cousins and to this day, I feel a little embarrassed when I think back to that moment in my life. I must’ve been 9 or ten.

2. I remember masturbating in my little twin bed when I was in junior high. Most of the time, I was inserting my fingers into my vagina but I distinctly remember my first orgasm that I had while masturbating. I wasn’t quite sure what was going on.

3. I have a cousin who is 2 years older than me. When I was about 9 or 10 I’d sleep over at my aunt and uncle’s house because I was very close to his sister. One night he came into our room and I felt his sweaty hands slide under my jammies. His breath was hot and I could hear it and feel it on my ear. I pretended to be asleep. He slid his hand into my underpants and I felt his fingers touch my vagina. I felt a wetness between my legs. Out of fear and curiosity, I shifted but still pretended to be asleep. I let him touch me and do as he pleased. Then he quietly left. This happened a couple of times and then I think I stopped sleeping over. I never told anyone but later my sister told me she remembered him doing the same things to her. I still see this cousin but we have never talked about it. Throughout most of my life, I felt shame when I saw him. Now I just don't like being around him at all.

4. I lost my virginity when I was 15 1/2. When I lost my virginity, I wanted to dump the guy whom I lost it to. I was disappointed in the experience because it was not fun at all. He snuck into my room late a night and left after it was all over. It was painful and I felt that I had made a mistake.

5. I didn't have much sex after losing my virginity. I fell in love for the first time when I was in 11th grade. He was horrible in bed. I think I faked all of my orgasms. We slept with each other again, years later, and he was still horrible and I still faked it.

6. By the time I was 18, I had many fantasies about girls. I never went out with a girl before and kept those fantasies to myself.

7. When I was 18, I was invited over to a 33-year-old's house. I knew he was attracted to me but I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I went over to his house, and we proceeded to make out. I think at the time, I was quite naive. We went into his bed, which must’ve been a king size one. His home felt so grown up to me. He went down on me and I had my first orgasm I had ever had with someone. The lack of control I had over my body scared me. I felt taken advantage of. I felt my innocence was taken away and that the experience was way beyond my emotional maturity. I’d see him at work and he kept coming around and asking me to see him again. I refused and then quit my job.

8. I met a guy in college, although he wasn’t a college student, who was so fantastic in bed. He introduced to me good consistent sex, toys and light bondage. I stayed with him for the sex.

9. After college, I slept with some of my friends who were all very cute. I was quite sexual but I think I had no desire to be emotionally attached to anyone. Looking back on those days, the sex was quite vanilla.

10. I met my husband to be. He was much younger than me. He has a big cock and he was young enough to experiment with. His fantasy was to have a threesome. I had met a young woman who was bisexual. I asked her if she wanted to have a threesome. She said yes and the three of us spent the night together. Nothing happened. She slept between us but we were all to afraid to act on it. So we all spent the nice tossing and turning. Eventually she confessed that she was attracted to me. I had a few interludes with her but eventually my husband to be grew jealous and asked me to stop seeing her. I did. However, I continued to fantasize about sex with a woman. I still wonder whatever happened to her. I secretly snuck off to visit her some time later. She begged me to spend the night but I left.

11. I married the younger man and we had a kid. After having our first child, my desire dropped. I didn’t want him to touch me. He developed a crush on another woman. What was odd was that my desire for him returned. The thought of him sleeping with a woman turned me on. Other than that, I had no desire to have sex with him. We divorced amicably.

12. I discovered online sex. I was lonely but horny. I was in my forties and I found that my sexuality was returning with a vengeance. I wrote erotic stories and began posting them on the internet. Men wrote me their stories and I grew hornier. I masturbated a lot during this time but still remained single. Eventually, I met a couple and had my first threesome. It was wild to meet two people, and then find myself in bed with them. I figure it was noncommittal sex.

13. I began an erotic exchange with a man 12 years older than me. He wrote me the most beautiful words. He added to my stories. He wanted to meet me. It was a cold rainy day and we met at a cafe. He was older than I thought he’d be and he looked nervous. I swore to myself I wouldn’t invite him home. Well, I did. We kissed madly and then built a fire. We laid down on the floor and I asked him if he minded if I took my pants off. I have been with him ever since.

14. I have had threesomes with my current lover but so far they have been much more fun to fantasize about than the reality of it. I am addicted to having sex with my lover. He is attentive, giving, wild and gentle. He is willing to experiment with me.

15. I am a bit of an exhibitionist. I have had sex in front of people at clubs. I also enjoy not wearing underwear under my skirts. It turns my lover on.

16. I have gotten off watching my lover with another woman.

17. I like talking dirty. I like when someone talks dirty during sex, not demeaning, but dirty. I love hearing my lover's fantasies while we are having sex.

18.Since turning 40, I have had the best sex.

19. When I cum, I often laugh and on occasion I have cried.

20. If I don’t trust my lover, it is a total turn off and yet, if I fantasize about them having sex with someone else, it turns me on. I don't get it.

21. Loyalty in regards to sex is important to me.

22. I don’t like watching porn that involves men.

23. If the sex is good, I am willing to overlook the bad in a relationship.

24. The sight of manly hands on my erogenous zones turns me on.

25. Intelligence, laughter, and humility are turn ons.