Wednesday, June 3, 2009

1. I am a gay man who lost his virginity at 16. It wasn't special. I never saw him again. I don't regret it.

2. I am now 20, and I have never had sex with a woman. Sometimes I'm curious, like when I mistakenly think a boyish lesbian is a cute guy, but usually I'm not.

3. I've lost track of my "number." I would guess it's somewhere in the 40s. I don't know half their names. I'm neither proud nor remorseful.

4. Sometimes people think they are dating me when they aren't. I don't know who gave them the idea. I certainly didn't. Apparently they're being cheated on when I sleep with other people, but I'm not cheating on anybody.

5. I haven't come from just a blowjob since I was 17. This means that sometimes I never come during a hookup. It's fine. I still got what I wanted.

6. I discovered the joy of anilingus (anal-oral sex) from someone whose dick was too big for me to consider putting inside me. I didn't think I could thank him enough, but a year later I did thank him by letting him put it inside me. It was like fucking a can of Red Bull.

7. I've had sex on my roof in front of God knows how many witnesses peering out their windows, but I don't consider myself an exhibitionist. I just liked the cold air.

8. The first time I slept with a Black man I found out the myth was false.

9. The first time I slept with an Asian man I found out the myth was false.

10. The first time I slept with an Asian man I found out I have an Asian fetish. It makes me feel racist.

11. If I want to sleep with an older man, I tell him I'm 18. I've done it since I was 16. I will probably be able to pull it off until I'm 28.

12. Sleeping with a "straight" guy is not one of my fantasies. It's happened, but not by seeking it out. They always think they're doing me a favor. In actuality, it's the other way around.

13. I don't go to gay bars or clubs. Maybe it's because I don't have a formidable collection of fitted tees. It's probably because I don't want to dry hump a boy on the dance floor, I want to fuck a man in my bed.

14. If I'm drunk, the chance I'll forgo a condom rises. It really does just feel better. I know it's a bad idea at the time, but I still do it.

15. After sex the last thing I want to do is cuddle. I want to take a shower and leave. Or make the other guy leave.

16. After sex I hate it when men ask me about the picture of my family on my bedside table. If I remember, I'll turn it around beforehand so as to avoid the conversation. The picture doesn't really bother me. It's just a picture.

16. Porn has destroyed my ability to think of my own sexy scenarios while masturbating. I'm okay with that.

17. In college I decided to check out getting paid for sex. I didn't need the money - I was curious. It was really easy to get paid to be worshiped for an hour or two. Clients have written me poems, tipped me 200% more than the initial fee, and rented rooms in five-star hotels just for the pleasure of my company. And my ass. I stopped because I got bored with it. Sometimes clients will still email me asking to schedule an appointment. Sometimes I do it.

18. I like to flirt with men until they want me more than anything else. At that moment I walk away. I find it empowering.

19. I have a fantasy about being fucked in the kitchen. When the opportunity arises, I find that my kitchen counter is too tall for most men to be able to reach me.

20. Sometimes I like dirty talk and sometimes I don't. I don't think I'm very good at it. In response I just moan louder. Usually I'm faking it.

21. I don't think semen is sexy. I wish there was an option to forgo ejaculation but still have the orgasm. I know it's possible, but I don't have the patience. I want a button.

22. I usually play into other men's fetishes. I'd pee on a man if he really wanted it, but I haven't encountered such a situation yet. I don't think it would turn me on.

23. I hate the terms "top" and "bottom." Anyone who says they are only one or the other is a liar fooling no one. I guess I'm "versatile," but I don't like that one either.

24. Mine is, but I don't care if a dick is circumsized or not. I find it gross when people complain that the man they went home with had an uncircumsized dick. It's rare that that man actually got to make that decision, anyway.

25. I've been exposed to HIV. When we hooked up, his last HIV test had been negative. We only used a condom part of the time. Two weeks after we hooked up, he tested positive. He didn't have the guts to tell me, so a mutual friend had to. I'm negative.