Tuesday, June 2, 2009

1. I've only had intercourse with one man.
2. I went into puberty early and spent most of my late childhood and teenage years both unbelievably horny and convinced that I was too fat for any boy to want to fuck. Not that I would have fucked many of the ones in my school--most of them were not attractive to me--but I would have appreciated the sentiment, I guess. In retrospect, I wasn't actually fat, either, but that idea has plagued me ever since.
3. I got my first boyfriend early in college, and he had a fat fetish. I'm not against odd fetishes in any sense, but you can imagine how it made me feel when he told me.
4. I've never gotten off on vaginal penetration alone. I've heard that it's common to need clitoral stimulation, but I still kind of feel like there's something wrong with me because of it.
5. Sex for me is a psychological thing. It's about power play down to its very roots, and if there's none of that going on, I probably won't be that turned on.
6. I'm probably what they call a switch, but most of the time, I like to be the dominant. But in my current relationship, that never happens. Sometimes I resent that.
7. I still fantasize about having sex with my high school senior English teacher. He was not a conventionally attractive man and was more than twice my age at the time, but I think if I had the opportunity now, I would do it.
8. My attraction to men always starts out intellectual and emotional. Being clever, funny, exceptionally good at something creative, or some combination of the three is the best way to get my attention, sexually. And an extra layer of charisma doesn't hurt, either.
9. I'm a hotbed of (relatively mild) fetishes. Most of them involve either feminizing men or being more masculine myself. That said, actually being a man or having sex with women holds pretty much zero allure to me. It's the gender play (and consequential power play) that's interesting.
10. Monsters (both literal and metaphorical) turn me on.
11. I read pornographic fan-fiction, but I find myself so frequently disappointed by it. I guess because I'm mostly interested in reading about kinky heterosexual sex. Most fan-fiction is either slash or catering to the wrong heterosexual fantasy.
12. I've found butts "exciting" since the very beginnings of puberty. I also have some interest in anal (as both the receptive and the aggressive party)--go figure.
13. In college I cheated on my boyfriend with my best friend. And that friend let me do things to him that my boyfriend has never allowed. That was probably the most fantastic sex I've ever had, and there was no genital penetration at all.
14. I'm more interested in being penetrated as a psychological concept than as a venue for sexual pleasure.
15. I am a major flirt with my close male friends.
16. My favorite part of sex is the conquest. I guess my brain is extremely male in that sense.
17. Sometimes I feel like I should have been born a boy. I've never been attracted to women (at least not enough to seriously consider having sex with them), but I've wanted a dick ever since I realized that boys had them.
18. Despite finding bestiality repugnant, I think it's hot when a woman poses nude with an animal. Not involving any sexual contact with the animal, but the animal is just there, and the nude woman is its master or something like that--that is sexy.
19. I also find goat legs sexy. Not on goats themselves, but on satyrs or fauns or demons--unf.
20. The best pornography implies a story and involves less-than-perfect people, physically. I'm honestly kind of repulsed by the chiseled physique that's idealized in the movies.
21. There is an exception to that--I know one guy with an excellent physique whom I would totally let in my pants, given the right circumstances. But he's smart and charming as hell.
22. Appearance-wise, I'm into looks that imply bookishness. I guess that's a side-effect of really being into smart guys.
23. Arrogance is also appealing, but part of that is because the idea of completely humbling a guy who's normally a puffed-up, strutting peacock in the bedroom is very, very enticing.
24. I have been punched in the cervix by my boyfriend's dick. It's big. That said, I think really big dicks are overrated. Probably by men, who are almost universally convinced that length is actually important. Boys, it's not, unless you really like punching your girlfriend in the cervix or something. (It hurts--please don't do that.)
25. I think my birth control pills might be sabotaging my libido.